Confessions of a Lapdancer

‘Leave Tania out of this,’ I said, pulling Luke over to one side. ‘I don’t know if you’re on some kind of bet to see how far you can wind me up, Luke, but you won’t break me.’

‘What makes you think I’m trying to break you? I’m just trying to have a little fun here. Women like you are all the same. You’re so bloody obsessed with success that it turns you into hard-faced old boots.’

‘I’ve had just about enough of your shit for one day,’ I said. ‘You’ve been on my case since the moment I met you and I will not tolerate you talking to me like this, especially in front of our boss.’

‘Oh Christ, Carson,’ he said. ‘You don’t get it, do you? If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. And by the way, I wouldn’t fancy you if you were the last chick on the planet, you’re so bloody uptight …’

‘Fuck off, Cotterill, you know nothing about me, who I am or what I’m capable of. Just get out of my face.’

Daryll saw what was happening, from where he was standing with some of the Brothers, but did nothing. I could only conclude that Luke’s juvenile behaviour had been condoned by the boys’ club, as if they were putting me through some perverse kind of jousting competition to see who would be knocked off their horse first. It was all in a day’s sport for them.

I had to do something that would completely floor Luke. What would wipe the smug smile off his face, short of punching him?

Suddenly I knew instinctively what to do. I strode over to Ryan, beckoning him with my index finger. He looked around, hesitating and waiting for their approval. However, he knew what side his bread – and his bed – was buttered on, so he followed me over to the dance area.

I slowly unbuckled my jacket, peeling it off and easing my black polo neck jumper over my head, revealing a skimpy black camisole over a black lace balconette bra.

Blinking under the harsh spotlight, I felt utterly exposed but I had to brazen it out. Luke had successfully upped the stakes and was standing with his arms crossed, waiting to see what I would do next. Would I stand or would I fall? There was no turning back now …

Chapter Three

It was time for me to put up or shut up so, in full view of my team, I bent over and unzipped my black spike-heeled boots, taking them off in as teasing a fashion as I could manage, dangling them in one hand before I let them drop to the floor.

Luke and Daryll seemed mesmerised by my breasts, as if they had convinced themselves I didn’t actually have any. To be fair to them, I’d always tried my hardest to cover them up in the office.

Ryan, of course, had been allowed to enjoy them intimately on more than one occasion so he was looking very pleased with himself, as if he’d suddenly been promoted to leader of the pack.

I took a deep breath, kept my eyes on him as I carefully stepped backwards on to a podium and wrapped myself around the cold steel of the pole. First I slid my spine up and down, splaying my knees into a squatting position, before pulling myself up with my hands above my head, sashaying my hips side to side at the same time.

Remembering the dance I’d seen earlier, I hooked one leg around the pole and twisted around until I reached the floor. Just at that moment, ‘Raspberry Beret’, one of my favourite Prince tracks, started playing.

‘Right,’ I thought. ‘I’ll show you uptight.’

By this point I could see the bulge in Ryan’s trousers, and the boys in the team whooping and cheering me on behind him.

I licked my lips as I swivelled around the pole, feeling damn grateful that I’d spent so much time on Zeus, not to mention the countless hours in the gym.

I was confident enough in my fitness and the strength of my biceps and thighs to try some of the more ambitious moves I’d seen that night, so I thought, here goes nothing, grabbed the pole at eye level and swung myself upside down, making a V-shape with my legs.

It required a lot of concentration to maintain a degree of gracefulness and sensuality; I had to make it look easy, even if it wasn’t – but then I was used to doing that every day at the office.

When I looked up, Ryan was salivating and even Luke was looking vaguely impressed.

Adrenalin was pumping through my body, partly with the effort, partly with the sheer thrill of dancing in such an erotic way. I loved the feeling of power it gave me, especially seeing the effect I was having on Ryan and his idiotic pals.

Their eyes were filled with a mixture of admiration and sheer lust, which actually sent a bolt of electricity through me that seemed to heat me up and make my skin burn.

I carried on swivelling, spinning and arching my back to the music for a good five minutes and finished on an ambitious move. Bending forwards with my head near the bottom of the pole and my hands halfway up it, I levered my legs off the floor and up to the vertical, wrapping my legs around the pole and gripping with my ankles to pull myself up, grabbing the pole again with my hands and gently circling around with my legs pointed in opposite directions until I was back on the ground again.

I was operating in absolute fight-or-flight mode and would probably feel the pain later.

When I was back on my feet, I realised everyone in the bar had been watching me and not even the security guards who had been so keen to eject Luke earlier had tried to stop me.

Ryan was transfixed and the Brothers, along with the rest of the male clientele, gave me a standing ovation.

‘Geri, you go girl, that’s more like it!’ one of the guys yelled, while Luke was pushed towards the back. I was drenched in sweat but every nerve ending in my body was tingling.

‘Thanks, guys,’ I said. ‘I’m not making a speech, but suffice to say I had a ball.’

‘Well, I think it’s more that you’ve got balls, Geri,’ said Tania. ‘Bravo to you too.’

I wondered why they’d let a female customer get away with stripping off and using the club’s equipment when I clocked a man in the top booth signalling to security to hang back. It was the same dark-haired guy that I saw Tania talking to at the bar earlier. I couldn’t figure out how or why she knew him but I was so flushed with excitement I didn’t care.

Gathering up my clothes, I waved to the boys and motioned to Ryan to accompany me.

I couldn’t resist shooting Luke a triumphant look.

I put my top and boots back on and we hailed a taxi back to Ryan’s apartment on the Isle of Dogs.

‘Jesus, Geri, I mean … Jesus, that was fucking amazing … where the hell did you learn how to do that?’ gasped Ryan, trying to conceal his erection.

‘I guess I’m just a natural, sweetie,’ I teased. ‘You have to be damned athletic to pole dance and I’m practically an acrobat.’

‘The guys from the office couldn’t believe what they were seeing, especially Luke,’ he said. ‘That was just such a genius stroke to pull, but aren’t you worried about what’s going to happen when you go back to work tomorrow?’

‘To be honest, Ryan, I couldn’t give a flying fuck now,’ I said. ‘If women like Tania can flash their tits and still get a job, then why should I care about being one of the boys?’

‘Good for you, Geri,’ he said, grinning from ear to ear. ‘I can’t wait to find out what your new game is, babe!’

‘Ryan, I’m not your babe or anyone else’s,’ I replied. ‘Just shut up and come here.’

And with that I grabbed the back of his head and kissed him deep and hard, plunging my tongue into his mouth.

Our hands were all over each other as the taxi headed back to Ryan’s place. I didn’t give a shit about the driver getting an eyeful. After the club, I felt stripped of inhibitions. When the cab pulled up, I swung open the door and stood on the pavement with feet apart and arms crossed, waiting for him to pay.

I kept him at arm’s length all the way up to his third-floor flat and waited until we were both safely inside before I told him what I wanted to do to him.

He tore off his jacket and was about to unbuckle his belt when I interrupted him.

‘No, Ryan, I want you fully clothed,’ I said in my best dominatrix voice, pushing him into the front room, which overlooked the river and Canary Wharf all lit up. ‘Get that dining chair and put it in the middle of the floor.’

‘Yes, mistress!’ he laughed, but I could see he was slightly nervous.

‘Right, sit down and stay down,’ I said.

I went over to his iPod decking station and put on one of my favourite tracks from Massive Attack’s Mezzanine album.

I took off the silk scarf I was wearing and used it to tie his hands behind his back, running my hands through his thick black hair before striding off to strip down to my thong and black lace bra, but this time putting back on the stiletto-heeled black leather ankle boots I’d had to discard while pole dancing.