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Rekindled Romance

Год написания книги
2018
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Shelby went willingly into the warm, familiar hug, clinging to the woman who had been her refuge throughout her childhood. The loving embrace siphoned off much of her fatigue and eased her fears. Coming home to Gramma had been the right thing to do. She stepped back, taking a quick inventory. Gramma’s hair was grayer, and there were more lines in her dear face. A few more pounds hugged the sturdy frame since she’d last seen her, but Gramma was still the same woman who had always loved her unconditionally.

“Child, let me look at you.” She frowned. “You look tired.”

Leave it to Gramma to get right to the heart of a matter. “I am. It was a long trip.”

“Well, I know you said you needed to rest, but I had no idea. You’re pale as a ghost.” Gramma shook her head. “Come on inside. I have sugar cookies for you.”

The moment Shelby stepped inside the old house, her senses exploded with memories. She inhaled the familiar aroma of furniture polish, potpourri and fresh sugar cookies. The wood floors creaked a welcome beneath her feet as her fingers gently touched the worn spot on the newel post.

Her gaze quickly traveled around the rooms. Nothing had changed. The furnishings were still in the same place, as if time had stood still. Shelby soaked in the comfort of the old surroundings. Her own life might be in turmoil, but Gramma’s house would always be her safe haven. “It’s good to be home, Gramma. I’ve missed this place.”

“Well, it’s right where it’s always been.”

A lump of shame rose in her throat. “I know.” Since leaving town, Shelby had stayed in touch with her grandmother and made the obligatory Christmas visits to her mother and stepfather’s home in Pensacola, but she had staunchly avoided a visit to Dover. She couldn’t risk running into Matt.

As they walked through the hallway, past the gallery of family photos, Shelby saw the picture of her aunt Teresa on the wall, and her conscience stung. She’d missed her aunt’s funeral, her mother’s only sister and a woman only ten years older than herself. Tween Scene magazine had been putting together their double Christmas issue at the time and that had seemed more important. Now Shelby winced at her callousness. “I’m sorry I didn’t make it back for Aunt Teresa’s funeral.” Shelby followed her grandmother into the kitchen.

“I understood, baby. Really I did.” Gramma smiled, handing her a plate of still-warm sugar cookies.

Shelby briefly thought about the dietary rules the doctor had laid out. Her mouth watered at the savory aroma, banishing her guilt. There was no need to start that healthy lifestyle right now. Tomorrow was soon enough. Sinking her teeth into one warm and sweet cookie transported her back in time. She was ten. Her father had deserted her and her mother. Shelby had run to Gramma’s, scared, confused and in tears. Ellen had baked a batch of cookies and they’d talked and watched movies well into the night.

Gramma pointed at the plate and raised her eyebrows. “Eat up. Those might be the last ones you get for a while.”

Shelby stopped midbite. “Why?”

“I work part-time at the church during the week, and I volunteer at the hospital whenever I’m needed. Besides—” Gramma planted her hands on her ample hips “—you’re not supposed to be eating all that sugar.”

Shelby pursed her lips. “I don’t think a few cookies will do any harm.”

Ellen frowned. “I see you haven’t lost your habit of avoiding the unpleasant. Is this how you rose to the top of your field? By avoiding things?”

“No, of course not.”

“You are following the doctors’ instructions, aren’t you? You’re watching what you eat and exercising, taking your medications?”

Shelby reached for another cookie. The sample medications the doctor had given her had nearly run out, and the prescriptions were still in her purse. Filling them would make this whole thing too real. Too final. “I’m going to.”

“Going to? When?” Gramma huffed out a puff of irritation. “Shelby Kay, you’ve got to take your heart disease seriously. This isn’t something you can avoid. Baby. I’ve already lost a husband and a daughter. I don’t want to lose you, too.”

The pleading in her grandmother’s voice punctured her defenses and exposed the gnawing fear in her spirit. Tears welled up in her eyes and clogged her throat. She was a lost and confused child again whose world was crashing in around her. Gramma’s love was the only thing that had saved her. And God’s grace.

She pressed her fingers to her lips as the fear took hold. “Gramma, I’m scared. How could I have had a heart attack and not even know it? I thought it was indigestion.”

Gramma came to her side and pulled her shoulders. “Oh, my baby girl. I know. I’m sure the doctor explained to you that the symptoms are very different in women. But you can get through this if you’ll just rely on the Lord.”

Shelby shook her head. “It’s not only my health, Gramma. The company I work for, Harmon Publishing, was bought by a competitor. I might not even have a job to go back to. The new management assured us everything would continue as before, but it’s only a matter of time before the pink slips are handed out.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that, but it’s only a job, after all.” Gramma squeezed her shoulders again. “It’ll all work itself out.”

Shelby pulled away, wiping her face with her palms and shaking her head. “It’s more than a job. This magazine is my life.”

Gramma scowled. “Nonsense.”

“My career is who I am.” Shelby stood and paced a few steps. “This is what I’ve worked for my whole life, and now I could lose everything.” Shelby buried her head in her hands. Gramma came quickly to her side, patting her back.

“You don’t know that. You’re facing a lot of obstacles right now, but you have your brains and your experience. You can always find a job. This might be the best thing that ever happened to you.”

Shelby gritted her teeth against the idea. “How could losing my career be a good thing?” Her grandmother stiffened, and Shelby realized how belligerent and disrespectful she’d sounded. “I’m sorry, Gramma. But I don’t want to lose my job. It’s important to me.”

“Better your job than your life.” Gramma stared down at her. “Seems to me, you’ve forgotten who to turn to when you’re lost.”

Shelby sank back down onto the wooden chair and tried to swallow her irritation. She wasn’t surprised by her Gramma’s comments. Her grandfather had been a minister. “Church talk” had been commonplace here. There had been a time when she had embraced her faith, depended upon it, but after she’d left Dover she’d drifted away. She’d channeled all her energy into school and then her career. Along the way she’d lost her connection to her faith.

Gramma patted her hand and slid the cookie plate toward her. “Enjoy your cookies. Today is your homecoming celebration. Tomorrow we’ll face the changes you have to make.”

Shelby nodded, feeling the fear and anger ease a bit. She had resisted coming back to Dover, but now she knew it had been the right decision. A few days here under Gramma’s loving care would ease anyone’s stress. A new hope blossomed in her heart. She had six weeks in which to accomplish her goals. First, get a handle on her health. Second, avoid Matt Durrant at all costs. That shouldn’t be too difficult. She’d have no reason to go to his hardware store, and he lived on the opposite side of town. And maybe, if she could relax quickly enough, she could cut her leave in half and get back to work sooner, and that would decrease her odds of running into Matt.

Matthias Durrant. The only man she’d ever loved. They’d promised to love each other forever, to be together always, but it hadn’t worked out that way. Matt had changed the plan, and she’d been terrified of losing her dream.

She’d never regretted her decision. So why did she find herself wondering what her life would have been like if she’d stayed here with him? Followed his dream instead of her own? There was no point in thinking about it. The door to the past was closed forever and couldn’t be reopened.

* * *

Matt Durrant rested his wrists on the steering wheel of the old battered van, smiling as his passenger opened the door and got out. “Thanks for your help today, Carl.”

The man nodded and raised a hand. “My pleasure. That roof should have been repaired months ago. We need more volunteers.”

“Amen to that.”

“Thanks for dropping me off at the house.” Carl smiled. “It saved Nancy a trip to pick me up.”

“No problem.” Matt watched as his friend walked up the drive toward his house. The front door opened and his wife, Nancy, walked out to meet him, wrapping him in that special kind of hug only a wife could give. Matt looked away, ignoring the sudden ache in the center of his chest, and put the car in gear.

But the image replayed in his mind as he drove the Handy Works van toward his home on the opposite side of town. He’d once had that kind of love. Until three years ago, when cancer had taken his Katie away. He called up a memory, looking for the comfort that normally soothed his wounded soul, but it didn’t come. Instead he found a gray void.

For the first time he longed for a real moment, not a vision of what had been. His memories had sustained him, kept him afloat, but lately it had been harder and harder to find solace in the past. Seeing Carl and Nancy just now had cracked the protective wall around his heart, exposing his vulnerability. Loneliness.

He’d been lonely every second since Katie had died, but this was different. This was more like a yearning, a hunger for something more. He wasn’t sure what it was exactly. His heart would always be missing the piece that Katie had filled. That first year he’d struggled to manage his grief against that of his children, trying to find a balance between keeping Katie’s memory alive and not being crushed under the memory of her illness and death. The decision to leave Atlanta and move home to Dover had been another upheaval in their lives that couldn’t be avoided. The pressures of his job had stolen precious time from his children. And they were his primary concern now.

Katie had begged him to not stop living after she was gone. She’d wanted him to find love and happiness again, but the thought had been abhorrent to him. He had no desire to risk his heart or his children’s on that kind of loss again. None of them could survive it a second time. It’s why he’d made the decision to come home. He wanted to raise his children near their grandparents, in a town where family values were still cherished.

Matt turned the corner onto Willow Street. Envy. That’s what had stirred up those old emotions. He was envious of Carl and Nancy’s normal life. But he knew he had so much to be thankful for. Two amazing kids, a family that loved and supported him, a job that allowed him to be home a good bit—the van hit a pothole and every bolt rattled and shook. He smiled. And a ministry that helped the community and allowed him to help others. Handy Works had been his sister’s brainchild. A mobile neighborhood help program, manned by volunteers who would donate their time and talents to making repairs and cleanup for those in need. He and his friend Carl Young had taken advantage of a rare afternoon free from teaching classes at Wells Community College to devote time to repairing the roof of an elderly man who lived at the edge of town.

Inhaling a deep breath, he reminded himself of his abundant blessings. Too many to count. This sudden feeling of loneliness would pass. Katie was the only woman he’d ever loved. No. There had been one other woman. A long time ago. But she’d abandoned him.

Matt flipped the blinker to turn into his driveway. Funny. Katie abandoned him through death; the other woman had abandoned him by choice. Maybe he was destined to be alone. Losing Katie had shredded his soul. He would never, ever love again. The risk was too great.

* * *
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