Wild Ride Cowboy

“Clara, you’re not handling this. You as much as admitted that you’re not paying your bills. You don’t want to sell, but if you don’t pay for stuff, you’re going to get it taken from you. And whatever you feel about being busy right now... It would be for the best if we can get the ranch to the point where it’s self-sustaining. I know that you’re going to get some money from the military, and until then I’m willing to put my own money into this place.”

Suddenly she felt drained. Felt defeated. Because while part of her wanted to stand here all evening and wage war with Alex, the fact of the matter was she’d already lost.

She let out a long, slow breath, then walked back to the stove, dumping the contents of her pan into a small bowl. “I’m going to eat,” she said. “Do you want to join me?”

“No thanks. I don’t order off the kids’ menu anymore.”

She shoved a bite of canned pasta into her mouth. “Your loss.”

“I’ll take a Coke.”

“Go right ahead,” she said, talking around her bite. “You probably have dominion over the Coke too.”

“The fridge, maybe. The contents, probably not.”

“Help yourself, anyway,” she said, tugging her bowl toward her and hunching over it ferally.

He took a soda out of the fridge and popped the top on it, and for some reason, she watched as he brought the can to his lips, watched as his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down while he took a long swallow of the beverage.

She looked back into her bowl of SpaghettiOs. “So what’s your brilliant plan for fixing my life? What are you going to invest in? I mean, this is your ranch now. I guess you can make it whatever you want. Buy a bunch of big-ass cows.”

“Like you said, there’s a lot of competition for beef. And frankly, this operation just isn’t big enough to play in that arena. But I do have an idea. And it kind of goes with your...bees.”

She let out an exasperated sigh. “What?”

“Bison. There’s a market for lean beef, organic stuff. We can get away with having a smaller scale operation. We would need to get better fencing, but most everything that you used for the cattle would work. And frankly, the farmers’ market idea is a good one.”

“Are you suggesting I sell honey, tomatoes and bison?”

“Yes. That’s exactly what I’m suggesting. I have the money to invest in this. I want to do it. And I think it’s the best thing for you.”

Clara bristled. “You think it’s the best thing for me. Based on speaking to me all of five times in my entire life? Based on the fact that you knew my brother? You don’t know what I want, Alex.”

“Okay. What do you want?”

His green eyes were intense on hers, and she didn’t know what to do with that. Didn’t know how to answer the question, mostly because she hadn’t expected him to pose it.

She had the fleeting image of Asher. Of him living in this little house with her. Enjoying a simple existence. Keeping bees, making honey. He could make artisan coffee and maybe they could have goats. She could make room in her garden for kale. She didn’t like tomatoes either, and she grew those.

She wasn’t going to tell Alex any of that.

“I’m not really sure,” she said. “I would settle for not being further traumatized by life at this point.”

Those eyes softened a little. “Unfortunately, none of us gets that guarantee.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“Think about it.”

She shoved another bite of food into her mouth. “What’s the point in me thinking about it, Alex? You own this place. Your word is law.”

“It was never my goal to come in here and take over everything.”

She snorted. “That is completely not true. Of course it was your goal. That’s why you’re here. To claim ownership. To take control.”

“Maybe it is. Why would that be a problem for you? You can continue to do what you’re doing. I’m just going to help get things more established, that’s all.”

“Excuse me for not exactly buying into this idea that you’re being a philanthropist here on my ranch. This benefits you financially. Or, it will.”

Alex’s jaw tightened, his face so still it had the look of granite. “I don’t need your money, Clara. But you need my help. And whether or not you believe it, I’m here because Jason asked me to be. Because I fought alongside him and that means something to me, Clara. Whether you can understand it or not, it does.”

She swallowed hard, feeling unsettled, feeling uncertain. First off, she didn’t know why she cared that he was here. Except that he was so large, broad and confrontational. Except that he made it feel so real that Jason was gone. Really gone. He knew things she didn’t know about her brother’s final moments, she was certain. She was also certain she didn’t want to know them. At least, not now.

But if Alex wanted to pour his money into the ranch, if he wanted to add another stream of revenue, there was nothing really to fight about.

She closed her eyes for a moment and had the oddest sensation that she was adrift on a river she didn’t want to be on. Drifting toward God knew where. On a raft she had never consented to get onto in the first place.

No control. None at all. But then, what else was new?

“Fine. Get your bison. Fix stuff. Whatever you need to do to feel like you’ve seen to Jason’s final wishes.” The word final stuck in her throat, snagged on a notch of emotion, making it feel as if she couldn’t breathe.

“I will.” He stood, gripping the brim of his hat and tipping it forward slightly. “I’ll be at the ranch bright and early tomorrow morning.”

“And I’ll be at work.”

His lips twitched. “But first, getting coffee again? Since you like it so much.”

Her face heated, and she fought against the blush she knew was intensifying. She was not a thirteen-year-old girl with a crush. She resented him for making her feel like one.

“Yes,” she responded. “Getting coffee again. My favorite.”

He lifted a brow but said nothing. “I’m sure I’ll see you tomorrow at some point.”

She nodded, and then Alex turned and walked out.

For some reason, as soon as the door closed behind him, a tear rolled down Clara’s cheek. And then another one. Maybe having Alex here should have felt like the answer to something. A wake-up call at the very least. That somebody had come in and seen just how unprepared she was to deal with all of this.

To move into a life that had to function without Jason in it. Forever.

And whether or not he intended to be, Alex Donnelly was a symbol of that.

CHAPTER THREE (#ub52b326e-27c8-53a8-9ff6-3bb8e53b0c8c)

ALEX WAS IN a mean mood by the time he got back home. It was late, and he was starving, and he was still replaying the scene with Clara over in his mind. He really should have gone to see her sooner. He had noticed the stacks of mail sitting on the counter. Had noticed the general state of disrepair of the place.

But he had a plan now, one that had been affirmed when he’d gotten there and spoken to her.

Bees.