The Little Book of Zlatan

What makes Muhammad Ali, Ayrton Senna, Usain Bolt and Maradona the greatest of all time? Is it the success they achieved or the way in which they achieved it?

As an obsessive fan of Zlatan Ibrahimović it can be easy to descend into hyperbole, and clearly it may be a step too far to put him on a pedestal with some of the greats above. In fact, it might be argued that, in the era of Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo, Zlatan cannot even be compared to his brilliantly gifted footballing contemporaries, let alone the most legendary athletes of all time.

So why write a book entirely dedicated to the third best player on the planet? Why celebrate a man who is renowned for his volatility as much as his extraordinary aerial prowess?

The answer – perhaps reassuringly in an era of big data, football academies and sports science – lies in the cult of personality. Zlatan is an icon not just because of his extraordinary records on the field, but because his personality has never had to take a back seat on the journey. Would Zlatan be a good guest at a party? The answer is yes, of course! Would Zlatan make a good big brother? Definitely. Would Zlatan have been successful if he had chosen a different career path, perhaps as a teacher, a builder or a karate coach? There is a very good chance he would have excelled in all three – all at once …

Zlatan Ibrahimović has an undeniable gravitas and charisma that makes us want to follow him on and off the field. He has a mercurial likeability that makes us want to laugh at his jokes, score his goals, forgive his errors and support the causes he supports. Does it matter what is fact and what is myth? When all’s said and done, we simply have to acknowledge Zlatan’s status as one of the most complex, most original and above all most interesting characters in the game, someone who will certainly and deservedly be remembered as ‘one of the greats’.

This is only a little book, but it is a tribute to the personality, humour and talent of a true giant. If in some small way it helps to cement Zlatan’s incredible legacy – not that he needs that help – it will have served its purpose.

Zlatan, we salute you!

MALCOLM OLIVERS, June 2017

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ZLATAN ON … ZLATAN (#ulink_843190ac-0a53-5f7c-aaa8-79e8e51bea47)

‘Zlatan doesn’t do auditions.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘When you buy me, you are buying a Ferrari.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘The only time Zlatan was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘First I went left, and he did too. Then I went right, and he did too. Then I went left again, and he went to buy a hot dog.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘I can’t help but laugh at how perfect I am.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘Zlatan’s computer has no “backspace” button — Zlatan doesn’t make mistakes.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘My dog picks up its own mess. Zlatan will not take shit from anyone.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘One thing is for sure. A World Cup without Zlatan is nothing to watch.’

Zlatan Ibrahimović

‘I think I’m like wine. The older I get, the better I get.’