The Horseman

“Damn it all, I wish you were coming back with me!” Stuart exclaimed, his handsome face marred by an angry expression.

“You don’t begrudge me my vacation, surely?” She winced. Even with her sunglasses on the sunlight was much too bright.

“I simply want you with me.”

“I know.” Stuart had been simmering ever since he’d joined her and Raul Montalvan the previous night, leaving her with the sensation she was caught in the eye of a storm. Even when they met up at breakfast, she’d sensed the continuation of his mood, but as a guest in her grandfather’s house he could scarcely vent feelings of outrage or jealousy. She was very much aware he’d had to make a huge effort in the final hours of the party. The celebrations had continued unabated until after two in the morning. When they’d left the mansion, the grounds were thronged with the staff of the firm that supplied the huge marquees and the tables and chairs, among other things.

Cecile tried to remain calm. Inside she knew she was approaching her own crisis point in life. It was a real struggle to hide it; harder yet to fight back.

“I just hate the idea of your being away from me,” Stuart said tersely, equally off balance.

“Goodness, it’s only a month!” She tried a soothing, sideways glance. “We’ll be speaking to each other every day.”

“Count on it.” He stared moodily out the window. “That bloody Raul made a hit with your grandfather.”

“That’s not very nice, is it, bloody Raul.”

“I know it isn’t, but I can’t help it. He’s too suave, too charming by half.”

“That’s his Latin blood,” she offered by way of explanation. “You’re not going to blame him for being charming?”

Stuart had the grace to look embarrassed. “I just wish he hadn’t turned up. He’s the sort of guy that stirs everything up.”

God help her, hadn’t Stuart put his finger right on it? “You are in an odd mood, Stuart. No sleep?”

“Not when you wouldn’t join me,” he said, sounding painfully rebuffed.

“Not with a house full of relatives, Stuart. I told you that wasn’t likely to happen.”

He gave an angry snort. “Sometimes I think you don’t give a damn if you sleep with me or not.”

Her heart was beating painfully fast. She hadn’t asked for any of this. It had just happened. Anyone could become madly infatuated. It was what one did about it that counted. “That’s not true, Stuart.” Even to her own ears her response didn’t sound terribly convincing, yet she enjoyed their lovemaking. Stuart was a considerate lover, able to give satisfaction and not lacking finesse. “Do we really have to ruin a beautiful day with all this? I promised to marry you, didn’t I?”

“But, Ceci—” Stuart twisted in the passenger seat to stare at her “—you won’t set the date. You’ve no idea how insecure that makes me feel. Hell, it’s like Justine says. We should be married and expecting our first child by now. You told me you loved children. I’m no longer sure.”

Normally slow to temper, she felt intensely irritated. “What an alliance you and my mother have formed! Both of you pushing me into marriage and motherhood like I was the wrong side of forty. I do love children, Stuart. I think my choice of a profession proves that. If you and my mother continue to hound me—” She broke off, breathing a sharp sigh of frustration.

“It’s not like that.” Stuart reached out to stroke her arm. “Darling, it’s not like that,” he said softly.

Nothing. She felt nothing. She was greatly shocked.

“We would never be guilty of that.” Stuart faced front again as though he thought it crucial he, too, mind the road. “Justine just wants the best for you, Cecile. You can be very difficult sometimes.”

That was grossly unfair. She shook her head weakly. “I thought I rarely gave trouble. In fact, I was the model child. Ask anyone. I always did exactly what was expected of me. I had to be top in everything, grades, sports, ballet, piano. I worked so hard to keep my mother proud of me. I was never under that kind of pressure from my father, thank God. I was always obedient and respectful. I’ve never played around. I’ve never touched drugs. My mother wants her idea of the best for me, Stuart. I’m not my mother. I love her, but I’m not like her. She means well, but she spends every day of her life making plans for me. She had to give up on Dad. I want her to stop. I’m twenty-six, but she continues to act as though one day I’ll screw up. Maybe she’s right. Now there’s a thought! My mother has always been too focused on me as her only child. I wish to God I’d had brothers and sisters. Anyone to take the heat off me. It won’t stop even after we’re married. Not with you encouraging her. Or is that going to stop when you’ve finally won the prize?”

Stuart’s whole face turned stony, an expression she rarely saw and decided she didn’t like. “I don’t deserve that, Ceci,” he said coldly. “Of course you’re a prize, but I’m genuinely fond of your mother. She’s a marvelous woman.”

“It’s a pity you didn’t meet someone like her,” Cecile shot back. “You have so much in common.”

Censure was in his voice. “You sound pretty darn resentful, do you know that? As a psychologist, you ought to know it. Justine and I do have a lot in common. We both love you. Look, I don’t want to argue, Ceci. I’m like a bear with a sore head today. I had way too much to drink last night and I’m no drinker, as you know. It’s just that I’m worried about leaving you here, especially with that bloody Argentinian hanging around. They fancy themselves as great lovers, you know.”

Cecile took a deep breath, trying to rein in her anger. “Well, he certainly gives the impression he might be. You don’t trust me, is that it? You were furious I was dancing with him. Your coldness to him made it pretty apparent. You didn’t get the opportunity to take it out on me, not with a party going on. You’re acting as though I can’t conduct myself in an appropriate manner if you’re not around, just like you’re bloody well braking now with your foot while I’m driving the car. Do you think I’m going to fling myself at a complete stranger like in some fruity melodrama?”

“You want the straight answer? Yes,” he said in a goaded voice. “There’s so much about you, Ceci, that’s beneath the surface. You act so cool and composed, but that could be your training. There was something between you, Ceci. You’re trying hard to deny it, but I’m not a complete fool. I’m your fiancé, the man you’re going to marry. Need I jog your memory? I have the right to question you.”

“Really? I might have to start questioning if you’re the right man for me. I hate people who go on about their rights, Stuart, unless it’s the right to life, liberty and freedom. So to hell with your right to interfere with my freedom.”

Stuart scowled. “You’re being childish, Ceci. It’s not like you to rebel. Maybe you were on too tight a leash as a child. My aim is to protect you. I’ve always trusted you in the past.”

“How sad, then, I’ve committed a very serious breach.”

“Ceci, you of all people appeared to be encouraging him.” He turned to her, his expression deadly serious.

She groaned. “You just can’t leave well enough alone, can you?”

“You think I want to speak like this?” His voice was a rasp. “I feel I have an obligation to point certain things out. I do respect your high moral standards, my darling. It’s Montalvan I don’t trust. You don’t have much vanity, but you’re a very beautiful woman. Who could blame him if he was attracted to you?”

“How the heck do you know he was?” she demanded, her anger fueled by feelings of guilt.

“Oh, he’s attracted all right!” Stuart declared with great conviction. “You could have been alone on an island. Forget there were three hundred bloody guests all around you.”

“You have to stop this, Stuart,” she said. “My head is starting to pound. Jealousy is a terrible thing. Lots of relationships can’t survive jealousy. So we were enjoying the dance. No big deal. I reserve the right to choose the men I wish to speak to or dance with without consulting you, fiancé or not!”

Observing the hectic flush in her cheeks, Stuart backed down. “Of course you can, Ceci. It was the way the guy was holding you, looking at you, that put me in a rage. He knows bloody well you’re my woman.”

She felt like stopping the car and jumping out. It would be so much easier than trying to push him out. “Don’t you love to get your tongue around the word my,” she fumed. “You’ve got a whole list starting with my career, my ambitions, my political aspirations, my new house, my new Beemer, my fiancée. I’m right down the list.” She realized in her agitation she was over the speed limit and quickly slowed. “Raul Montalvan is a beautiful, natural dancer. Why not? Argentina is the home of the tango after all.”

“Ahhh, Ceci,” he groaned, “You’re making quite an effort to put me off the scent, but there was a little more to it than that. Even Sasha noticed.”

“Sasha?” Cecile gave an incredulous laugh. “The two of you were spying on me?”

“Of course not.” Stuart spoke in an aggrieved tone. “It was only by chance she spotted you.”

“I bet!” She swung her head toward him. “Sasha always was a troublemaker.”

“Actually she’s very fond of you. She wouldn’t want to see you put a foot wrong any more than I would. Women are very sharp. You catch on to things we men don’t. But the way the two of you moved together it would have crossed anyone’s mind, even trusting ol’ me. There was just some aura for all to see.”

“Could it have been an alcoholic haze?” she asked with some sarcasm. She was rebelling against the accusations, even as she knew she was in denial. “Sasha was sloshed. I could equally well point out you had no objection to Sasha’s clinging on to your arm.”

Stuart grimaced. “She doesn’t mean a thing to me and you know it. I bet you weren’t a bit jealous of Sasha even though she’s a damned sexy girl. Doesn’t that tell you something about our relationship?”

“I’ve learned to trust you, perhaps?” Cecile maneuvered the big car into the busy right lane so she could take the freeway turnoff.

“You can trust me. I don’t want anyone else but you, Ceci. And I have some ethics, if that bloody Argentinian doesn’t. Who is he, anyway? He appears out of nowhere and makes a beeline for you.”

She felt like she wanted to sleep for hours. Shut it all out. “One dance!” she said sharply. “You call that making a beeline?”

Stuart sat straighter, rubbing his trousered knees. “Steady on.”