David's Little Lad

I looked at my watch again, it was four o’clock. I must speak.

“David,” I said, “do you love God better than any one?”

The agitation in my voice must have penetrated to David’s heart at once; he turned round and looked at me.

“I do love Him better than any one, Gwladys; but why do you ask?”

“You would never be angry with God whatever He did?” I said, again.

“Angry? no, no; what a strange question.”

“I have a reason for asking it,” I said.

“Gwladys, you have been keeping something from me; what is the matter, what is wrong?”

David was excited now, he took my hand in his with a grasp which unconsciously was fierce.

“There is something wrong,” I whispered.

“Something you have been keeping from me?”

“Yes.”

“All day?”

“Yes.”

“How dared – ” checking himself – remaining silent for a second, then speaking with enforced composure.

“Tell it to me, my dear.”

But I had given way, I was down on the grass, my face hidden, my sobs rending me.

“Is anything wrong with the mother? Gwladys.”

“No, no, she is well.”

“Or Owen?”

“No.”

“The mine is all safe, there has been no accident?”

“The mine is safe.”

A long pause, I was sobbing, David was breathing hard.

“It isn’t, oh! my God, there is nothing wrong with the little lad?”

“It is him.”

“Not dead.”

“He is dead.”

I raised my head now to look at David. David put out his hand to ward me back.

“Don’t speak to me,” he said, “don’t tell me anything more about it yet. I must be alone for a little, wait here for me.”

He disappeared out of the doorway, he did not return for two hours; during those two hours I prayed without ceasing for him.

Chapter Seventeen

Sight to the Blind

All this time I had completely forgotten Owen. Never once during the whole of that day had I given Owen a thought. His agony and his sin were alike forgotten by me; his very name had passed from my memory.

At the end of two hours David returned to my side, sat down quietly, and asked me to tell him what I knew.

I did not dare look in his face. I repeated as briefly, as impassively as I could, what I had witnessed and heard this morning. To make my story intelligible, it was necessary to mention Owen’s forgetfulness of the old shaft; this brought Owen back to my mind, but with only the passing thought essential to the telling of my tale.

To my whole story David listened without a comment, or the putting of a single question. He sat, his head a little forward, his hands clasped round his knee. I saw that the veins had started prominently forward in the strong hands. When I came to the part of my tale where Owen appeared and bent over the dead child, he started for the first time, and looked me full in the face; then he rose to his feet, put his hand on my shoulder, and said —

“Come, my dear; we will go home. I must find Owen!”

“Find Owen!” I repeated, too surprised to keep in my hasty words. “Do you want him so quickly? has he not brought this trouble upon you?”

“Hush, Gwladys, in God’s name – this is an awful thing for Owen!”

Once or twice as we travelled back to Ffynon, as quickly as horses and steam could take us, I heard David say again under his breath, “This is an awful thing for Owen!”

His first question when we got back, and mother raised her white, agitated face to his, was —

“Where is Owen? I must see Owen directly!”

“Oh, my boy! he is not here; he has not been here all day. Oh, my dear, dear boy; I am so terrified about him!”

“Not here all day, mother! Have you no idea where he is?”

“No, my son; he left the house when he heard of the accident, and has not been back since. David, you won’t be hard on him – you will – ”

“How can you ask me, mother? Will you never understand what I feel for Owen?” he said, impatiently, and in pain; then, turning to leave the room, “I am going to find Owen at once! – but stay! where and how is Gwen?”

“Gwen is upstairs; she is very ill; she blames herself most bitterly. She has been asking for you.”

“I will see her for a moment before I go. Don’t come with me, mother and Gwladys; I will see her alone.”

David had been with Gwen for five minutes, I heard Gwen sobbing, and David talking to her quietly, when at the end of that time I entered the room.