Captivated: Letting Go / Seize the Night

“I’m sure she is. We never had children. My ex, Steve, wanted a son. But we never got pregnant.” She hesitated, then cleared her throat. “It’s a good thing, really. If I’d had a child with him, I’d never have been able to leave him.”

He wasn’t going to argue with her about that, though he knew plenty of people who hadn’t stayed together for the sake of the kids. “You’ve been divorced for...?”

“Officially, three years.” Colleen took her mug, warming her hands but not drinking. When she put the mug back on the tray and fixed him with a look, Jesse braced himself. He’d seen that sort of look before. “I just want you to know something. Last night... I’m not usually like that.”

“Hey, no judgment.” Jesse shook his head. “We’re both grown-ups. It seemed right at the time. It doesn’t mean I think less of you or anything. And, believe it or not, I’m not usually one to just hop into bed with any random stranger, either.”

“But when you do, you make sure you’re prepared.”

“Learned my lesson the hard way,” he told her lightly. “I love my kid more than anything in the world, but it sure did make me a helluva lot more careful about sex.”

“It’s not the sex. Well, yes, the sex,” she amended. “But not the fact we did it. Just...how it was.”

He smiled at her. “You mean fantastic?”

Color rose in her cheeks, and her eyes glittered. “I mean how I was. With you. Telling you what to do and... Well, I’m not really that controlling, I’m really not like that. I don’t have to have it all my way.”

Her voice cracked. She picked up her mug and sipped, grimacing. She must’ve burned her tongue. The cocoa spilled over her fingers, and she yelped. Jesse grabbed up a paper napkin and pressed it to her hand, blotting the spill and taking the mug from her at the same time with his other hand. He set it down.

“You okay?”

“I’m fine!” She was clearly anything but fine as she got up to pace in front of the fireplace. “I just wanted you to know that I’m not like that. That’s all.”

“Like what? Powerful? Strong? Sexy as hell?” Jesse watched her without getting up.

She whirled to look at him. “Uptight and controlling and demanding and...needy! You think I needed you to fix my fireplace? That I couldn’t do it on my own?”

“You didn’t do it on your own,” he pointed out.

“That doesn’t mean I couldn’t!”

Jesse bit back his defensive response, which left nothing but silence between them. She was breathing hard, her color high. Snow from earlier had melted in her hair, making it gleam. Like starlight. And damn him, he still wanted to bury his face in it and let her do whatever she wanted with him.

“I didn’t think you were uptight or too controlling,” he told her finally. “If you want to know the truth, I liked it when you took charge.”

For a moment longer, she said nothing. Then she scoffed, “Sure you did.”

“Colleen, do you really think I didn’t have a good time last night?” Jesse got up to approach her, but she took a step back and he stopped. “It was amazing, being with you. When you told me to keep still. The way you moved. I don’t have to tell you how sexy you are.”

“I’m not begging for a compliment, Jesse.”

“It’s not a compliment. It’s an opinion.”

Colleen’s eyes narrowed, and she bit her lower lip. “You liked being bossed around?”

“Well. I can’t say I love being bossed around in regular life, no. But in the bedroom, yeah. A little bit.” He took a deep breath, thinking about it. “Okay, a lot.”

“I’m not a dominatrix,” she said flatly. “If you’re expecting me to pull out the whips and chains and leather, you’re going to be disappointed.”

The idea of that, no lie, did get his cock a little thick, but he kept his expression neutral. “I’m not disappointed.”

Colleen put her hands on her hips. “I just didn’t want you to think that’s how I am.”

“But that is how you are,” Jesse said.

“You think I like telling you what to do?” Her eyes blazed, but she didn’t look angry. Not quite.

“Yeah.” He took a step closer, waiting for her to pull away. She didn’t. “I think you do. I think you get off on it, the way I get off on you doing it.”

“Bullshit.”

“What’s bullshit is you trying to act like being in charge sexually makes you a controlling bitch, when one has nothing to do with the other.” Jesse took another step toward her. Close enough now to grab her, though he made no move to do so.

“My ex said—”

“Maybe,” Jesse told her, “you should think about letting go of what your asshole ex-husband said and just do what makes you feel good.”

She stifled a gasp. “You think fucking you made me feel good?”

“I know it did. And I’d like to do it again. And again, until you come so hard you can’t stand up.”

He’d blown it. Gone too far. He could see it in her eyes and the twist of her mouth and the way her shoulders squared. But Colleen surprised him.

“Take off your clothes,” she said. “Now.”

His hand went to his belt at once. Unbuckled. Unbuttoned. Unzipped. He shoved his jeans down his hips, past his thighs, and stepped out of them. She glanced at them when he kicked them away, but only for a second or so before her gaze fixed on his face. Jesse held Colleen’s stare with his as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed that, too. Standing in only his socks and boxer briefs, his cock already straining the soft fabric, he hooked his thumbs in the waistband and waited. Heart pounding.

“Everything,” she told him. “I want you naked.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He’d tried to sound light, but failed. His voice was as thick with need as his hardening dick.

Colleen groaned softly, drawing out her reply, spoken so softly he barely heard it. “Fffffffuck.”

Naked in front of her, cock bobbing, he should’ve felt ridiculous. But when she circled him, admiring, letting one hand reach to trail along his shoulder blades and then down the line of his spine, all he could do was close his eyes and enjoy the caress. When she slid a hand to cup his balls, then stroke him, his knees buckled.

“Get on your knees,” Colleen whispered. There was nothing of whips or chains in that command, nothing harsh. She said it as though she expected his worship, but did not yet believe she deserved it.

He didn’t so much get on his knees as much as he melted onto them. His hands went naturally behind his back, wrists crossed at the base of his spine. He didn’t think about why. She hadn’t asked him for that. It just seemed right.

At the soft touch of her hand on his hair, he shuddered. Gooseflesh broke out all over him, though he was anything but chilled. Her hand passed over his head and then cupped his chin. She tilted his face to look up at her.

“You can go,” she told him. “I can’t make you stay. Or do this.”

In reply, he turned his face to kiss her palm. He spoke against her skin. “Tell me what you want, Colleen. And I’ll do it.”

“I don’t know what to ask.” Her voice rasped. “I’m not sure how.”

He leaned to press his face to her belly. She wore leggings. When he pushed his mouth between her legs he could feel the heat of her through them. He breathed out, adding the heat of his breath. Then the pressure of his mouth and chin.