Berry Tea. Become your own source of light in the dark

In his laboratory, he invited previously unfamiliar man and woman, whom he offered to answer 36 questions. People had to speak sincerely, empathizing with each other. After discussing the issues, the couple looked at each other for 4 minutes. It’s amazing what happened then – after six months, these people decided to get married.

The secret of this experience is that in answering such detailed, personal questions, people become open, vulnerable. Overall openness is very close. Having talked on such topics with a complete stranger and having listened to him carefully, you will very quickly gain his trust. In addition, these questions can be used in relationship therapy. A couple who are receding from each other can quickly refresh their feelings with the help of a confidential conversation. Here is a list of these amazing questions:

1. Choosing from everyone in the world who would you invite to visit for dinner?

2. Would you like to be famous? What would you like to become famous for?

3. Before you make a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

4. How do you see the perfect day?

5. When was the last time you sang alone with yourself? And for someone else?

6. What would you choose: to keep your body or mind 30 years old in the next 60 years of your life?

7. Do you have a secret premonition about how you die?

8. What are the three common features that you and your partner have?

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything in the process of your upbringing, what would it be?

11. In 4 minutes, tell your partner the story of your life in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow, having acquired a certain quality or ability, which / what?

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about your life, about the future, or about anything else, what would you like to know?

14. Is there something that you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why didn’t you do this?

15. Name the greatest achievement in your life.

16. What do you value most in your friends?

17. What is your most cherished memory?

18. The most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that within one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything in your current life? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What is the role of love and affection in your life?

22. Name the positive characteristics of your partner, about 5 points.

23. How close are your family members? Do you think your childhood was happier than most other people?

24. What do you think about your relationship with your mother?

25. Make three true sentences, starting with «we». For example, «we are both in this room thinking about…»

26. Continue this phrase: «I would like to share with someone…»

27. What should a partner know about you with whom you want to become close friends?

28. Tell your partner what you like most about him. Try to be extremely honest.

29. Share with your partner the most embarrassing moment of your life.

30. Remember when and from what you last cried.

31. What thing seems so serious to you that it is impossible to joke about her?

32. If you were to die this evening, what important would you like to say and to whom?

33. Your house with all your property caught fire. After rescuing loved ones, you have time to return to the house again and save some one thing. What is this thing and why do you choose it?

34. Which death of your family members would hurt you the most? Why?

35. Share your personal problem and ask your partner to advise how to solve it.

36. Tell us about your first love.

As Erich Fromm asserts in his book «The Art of Love» – love is not something easily accessible and accidental. Realizing their loneliness in this vast world, people strive to unite with someone who would understand them and support them. These questions very well connect even completely different people, because to think together about such important points means to get as close as possible to each other.

Carry out this experiment with your other half, and if it is not there, it does not matter. By discussing such issues, you can very quickly get close to someone you like. Psychology is a magical science, it can work wonders.

8

In the East, there is a belief that birds do not know how to be sad, because they are awarded with eternal freedom. When they are disappointed in something, they fly to the sky for a long time. The higher the better. They fly with the confidence that tears will dry under the gusts of wind, and the swift flight will bring them closer to a new happiness. People can learn a lot from birds. People need to learn how to fly, even if the wings are broken. You just need to want to get off the ground, soar towards yourself.

    9
    — In the world there is an absolute destructive truth, and it is a thousand times more important than whether you managed to get to the first line of the charts or not. This truth is this: if you really want to do something, do not wait when they ask you to.
    Do not ask permission.
    Do not wait until you are certified or until you are offered a certain amount of money. Instead, it is better to get ready for a possible defeat in advance and spit on what your friends, friends and relatives think.
    Whatever it is, whatever burns you from the inside – do it now. Tomorrow is too late. You should not expect that you will be given tomorrow every day.

10

– In this world there is nothing yours. Nothing belongs to you here. Yours is only that which is within you. These are your states, feelings and emotions. They are the main value for you, even if you do not understand. Or often forget.

Do you think you own your things? What did you buy? What was presented to you? This is not true. Your computer, on which you now read this text, from the point of view of the world is a bunch of atoms and molecules, like a litter bin, standing on the street in front of the entrance. The computer belongs to this world, and he does not know that it is yours. He does not care who it is specifically, even if nobody else. Like all your other stuff.