The Complete #LoveLondon Collection

‘Well?’

‘I didn’t lose her Christian. We haven’t gone shopping and got momentarily separated. She’s dead. I will never see her again.’ She spoke through clenched teeth, sobs rising up in her throat. ‘Do you understand that? And yes, people die, but she wasn’t supposed to go for years. When your parents get old you know you’re going to have to deal with at some point but not when they’re in their mid-sixties, and die of a massive, sudden heart attack.’

The argument had gone on for half an hour after that, until, exhausted and wracked with grief, she’d run out of their flat with no shoes or coat on, no handbag or belongings. Christian had pursued her, calling her name, but she’d been in such a state she’d sprinted across the road and into the path of a car. She remembered the impact, the feeling of pressure, the sound of crunching glass, the poor driver’s alarmed face, but she didn’t really remember any pain. That came later, when she woke up in hospital to be told her leg was broken and she’d fractured three ribs on one side. Ribs that, as it turned out, never healed entirely right.

The recovery period in hospital gave her time apart from Christian. Hours of staring at light green walls, or gazing at mindless TV, reassessing her life. She hadn’t meant to run out in front of the car, it hadn’t been some death wish to join her mum, she’d just been careless and driven by loss. But the accident did give her space and distance. Enough of a breather that when Christian came to pick her up, she told him she wasn’t going home with him, would never go home with him again. He’d let her down too badly and the last few weeks had changed her too much. She wasn’t happy with him, with their life together.

***

‘I am sorry,’ he repeated, lifting his second cocktail and gesturing for her to do the same, ‘really. Give me another chance. What do you say?’

‘I’m sorry too. I know the way I broke up with you, how sudden it was, must have been hard. And what you’ve done today, the letters and hunt, are incredibly romantic. If you have genuinely changed, maybe-’

The sound of Christian’s ring tone interrupted her answer, and several nearby customers gave him and Frankie dirty looks.

He glanced at the screen. ‘I need to get this. Apologies, I’ll be back in thirty seconds.’

She gaped after his departing back. Or he hadn’t changed at all. Taking a sip of her cocktail she rooted around in her bag, finding a brief Ok, Good Luck x text from Kate. She selected another unopened message.

Hey, weird girl! Just to say Happy New Year, whatever you’re doing tonight. See you in 2015! Z x

No matter what, Zack always made her smile. Could she say the same about Christian? But did she want, or need, either of them in her life? And if she did, in what role?

She drained her cocktail, feeling light-headed and a bit drunk, on top of the champagne in the limo earlier. Christian had been gone a lot longer than thirty seconds. What on earth was he doing? Signalling to the waiter to keep their table, she wandered out into the main lounge area, creeping up behind Christian as he sat in a winged chair, in animated conversation on the phone.

‘Yes, it worked, she loved it, said it was really romantic. Yes, I’ll send the bank transfer later tonight. I’ll be recommending the service to my friends. Thank you.’

‘You didn’t organise this yourself?’ Frankie’s outraged voice made Christian jump and he fumbled his phone, dropping it on the floor.

Scrambling to pick it up, he turned around. ‘Frankie, what are you doing out here?’

‘Finding out that you haven’t changed at all apparently,’ she replied, crossing her arms over her chest. ‘Same old Christian, throwing his money around. Whoever that was, they wrote all the clues, right? Picked everything out?’

‘It’s the thought that counts.’

‘When you put the effort in yourself, not when you pay someone else to do it for you!’ She could see from the look on his face that he just didn’t get it. And she didn’t think he ever would. ‘Tell me what really happened. Why aren’t you in Bali? It’s not like you to give up a trip like that.’ She stepped right into his space, eyeballing him. ‘You may as well be honest. You’ve blown this anyway.’

‘But what about the dress and the earrings? What about dinner? I’ve booked a table.’

‘That’s your problem, not mine.’ A tingling feeling ran over her shoulders, like a weight she hadn’t known she’d been bearing had lifted away. ‘I felt bad about ending things the way I did,’ she shared, ‘and I’m sorry if I hurt you and this is some odd the one that got away thing you’re doing, but I’ve changed. And I don’t think you’re ever going to.’

Christian’s face tightened. ‘You didn’t hurt me that badly, don’t worry. My girlfriend and I broke up last week and I didn’t care to go alone, that’s all.’

‘So you had a gap to fill?’

‘No! I’m not that bad,’ he softened, ‘I- I got this wrong. I’m sorry.’

‘All right then, take care.’ Nodding, she spun on her heel.

‘Frankie, wait, where are you going?’

She looked over her shoulder, ‘I’m going to get the wrap and find somewhere I can get some air. Alone,’ she emphasised. ‘Then I’m going to spend the rest of New Year with my friends.’ Smiling at the thought, ‘I’ll get the rest of the things returned to Harvey Nicks as soon as I can. Take care Christian, and good bye.’

‘Stay,’ he exclaimed, talking to her back. ‘Have dinner, relax. It’s on me.’

‘No, thanks.’

He sighed heavily, ‘You won’t owe me anything, it’s an apology. I miscalculated. I’m leaving, don’t worry.’

She hesitated. Was she really going to turn dinner at The Ritz down out of principle?

‘Please.’ He walked past her, ‘I’ll let the waiter or someone know. Stay. Call a friend to join you. Try and have a happy new year, if I haven’t ruined it for you.’

Softening - he wasn’t all bad - she laid a hand on his arm. ‘Fine, I’ll stay. Thank you.’

Nodding briskly, he tucked his phone in his pocket and strode away. He didn’t look back.

She decided to dine alone at a leisurely pace. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity, especially now Christian was gone for good. She also needed time to think things through without distraction, or conversation. No advice from Kate, or Davey – she texted him to say she’d join them later - no instinctive reaction about her single status. She ate a sumptuous three course meal that she was convinced ruined her taste buds for all other food, and reflected on the last year, and everything today had shown her.

Sometimes to go forward, you have to look back, Zack had said.

By the time she finished eating, the restaurant was nearly deserted. She went back into the Rivoli Bar and pulled out her phone.

I need to see you. Can you come & find me? F xx

She attached her location to the message using Googlemaps and sat down to wait.

Two hours later, she stood shivering on the roof terrace of The Ritz, overlooking Green Park and Westminster. Four large copper lion statues guarded the corners of the roof, and the London Eye was lit up with the night’s festivities. Barges and boats floated on the Thames and music sounded on the air. She couldn’t see the crowds of people down by the river, but she knew they were there.

‘You look extraordinary Frankie.’

‘Zack!’ she swung around to look at him. ‘You made it. Thanks for coming. And thank you for the compliment. But was there a but in there?’

‘Yes. You look extraordinary, but not like you. I kind of prefer the tight jeans and off the shoulder tops with your stiletto boots. Like that time at the pub for Fiona’s leaving do. It was sexy.’

‘Really?’ Hope flared, making her nerves jangle.

‘Yes.’ He made his way over to her.

‘Do you think I’m sexy?’ she demanded, stumbling closer to him.

‘Are you drunk?’

‘Nooo,’ she may have ruined it by her eyes crossing at that precise moment, ‘all right,’ she held a thumb and finger up and squeezed them together, ‘maybe a little bit.’

‘Weird girl,’ he sighed, ‘what have you been doing to yourself? And why are you here?’

‘So, I’m here because my ex set up this scavenger hunt thing where I had to follow these clues, and I got my hair and make-up up done at Harvey Nicks and they put this dress on me and then there was a limo ride here.’ She blurted in a rush, and then took a breath. ‘But I did not put on the earrings,’ she said sternly. ‘I had champagne, and cocktails, then a gorgeous red wine over dinner. I think there may have been cocktails after that,’ she shrugged, ‘I can’t quite remember.’