Plays on the 5,6,7,8,9,10 people. Collection №4

YURA (businesslike): So! Again with the topic jumped. So, today we are going to find me a life partner! Or have you changed your mind to help me in this difficult task?

SANEK (smiling contentedly): What are you, old boy! Where are you without your old friend, wise bitter experience in the field of gender relations? Of course, I will help, I have already made some sketches, so to speak, variants. We are going to place an ad about Dating on the Internet?

YURA (delovo): Well, where else? Not on the fence as in the middle ages…

SANYA (business): There! I figured out how to correctly compose the ad text, so that, you know – to hook! To attract! To catch the hook of such a girl, with whom you will then swim all your life in the ocean of passion!

YURA (rather admiringly): That's what an experienced friend means! As I said! Come on, come on. What are the options you came up with?

Sanek is all of himself, he feels the master of the situation, he is the "king of the world".

SANYA (business): So, we need to show your strengths, in the most attractive light to present to the court of single girls, or not singles, this is already… you know, things happen, your person. So. Option one!

YURA (intrigued): Right?

SANEK (pathetic): A seasoned alpha male, in the Prime of life, with excellent health and a well-established genotype, is looking for a worthy candidate for the post of a faithful reliable life partner!

Sanek pauses, waiting for a reaction.

Yura looks at him indifferently.

SANEK (pathetic): What's it like?

SANEK (disappointed, drooping): Listen well… I don't know, of course, what's wrong with the genotype. About health – well… unless… Yes, I'm not exhausted by work, but I would hardly be accepted into the Olympic reserve, as if… everything is not so smooth for me. And last – a seasoned alpha male! I have no idea what to do with the girl, how to go where and what Makar, and how to get to the stage of relevance of this issue? What kind of alpha am I? Where did you find the male in me? (embarrassed) No, thank you very much, but it's not true, is it?

SANEK (cheerfully, fervently): Ha, yurok, made me laugh. Who writes the truth in ads on Dating sites? And in General, in principle, in ads. This is the most that neither is advertising! And advertising works only when it is able to convince the average person that this product, product, service or… (takes a breath, points to a friend) in this case, a person, just needs it! We have to make you the kind of macho man that hundreds of women, thousands of girls, and maybe even a dozen men will want.

Sanek twists his smile, jokingly shows his tongue.

Yura shudders at the last thing he heard. His face reflects a premonitory state.

SANEK (cheerfully, fervently): Yes, I'm joking, relax, (with a dig) although…

Yura's look makes it clear that he does not Intend to joke, not the mood.

SANEK: okay. A lot will depend on the quality of your profile picture!

YURA (timidly): A..... is it necessary?

SANEK (pressing): Of course! This is almost the most basic point! The most important first factor that will determine whether you will start to study in detail or immediately scroll through the General pile of questionnaires.

YURA (uncertainly): Listen, well… well, what about the soul there, interests… essence of man. You can't just judge someone by their appearance!

SANEK (sarcastically): Yes? You flipped through these sites in front of me last week! I saw you there looking for a soulmate, sweeping left and right all those who did not conform to the categories is not something that even a miss of a city or region, but something even a miss world or miss universe, not every you have arranged for a photo in the profile! Well… you can talk?

GEORGE (indignantly): This is different! After all, I'm a man, it's important to me that my girlfriend was beautiful!

SANEK (with sarcasm): And… so it's important for you that the girl is beautiful, well-groomed, and so on, and the girl, do you think, does not care what her possible future chosen one looks like? Yes, girls study us even more carefully in this sense, even though they say that appearance is not important. But they say a lot of things, and they've never exchanged me for a handsome man! So…