‘Why not? Unless you do feel guilty?’ Blue-grey eyes bored into her. ‘If he dazzled you with his wealth and charm that doesn’t make you a gold-digger. When you start out with nothing it’s easy to be swept off your feet—to welcome the idea of lifelong security and easy wealth. There is no need for guilt.’
‘I wasn’t dazzled by his wealth. I always vowed that I would earn my keep every step of the way.’ Wouldn’t set foot on her parents’ path. ‘I wasn’t after Hugh’s cash.’
And yet...
A small hard lump of honesty formed in her tummy. ‘But I suppose with hindsight I am worried that I was dazzled by the idea of a family. He said he wanted kids, and...’
Yes, there had been that idea of it being within her grasp—the idea that she’d finally found a man who wanted a family. Not a man like Steve or Gary but a man who could provide, who needed her and wanted her help to heal him... What a sucker she’d been. Never again—that was for sure.
‘I assume he lied? Like he’s lying now? That is his bad. Not yours. So fight him. I had you down as a fighter.’
‘I can’t win this fight. Hugh Farlane is too big to take on. It’s unbelievable how much clout he has. He has enough money to sink a ship...enough publicity people to spin the Bayeux Tapestry.’
‘What about right and wrong?’
‘That’s subjective.’
It was a lesson she had learnt the hard way. She’d fought the good fight before and lost her siblings. Lord knew she was so very happy for them—joyful that Tom and Edie and Philippa had found an adoptive family to love them all. But it had been hard to accept that they would never be the happy family unit she had always dreamed they would be.
So many dreams...woven, threaded, embroidered with intricate care. Of parents who cleaned up their alcohol and drug-fuelled life and transformed themselves into people who cared and nurtured and loved... And when that dream had dissolved she had rethreaded the loom with rose threads and produced a new picture. An adoptive family who would take them all in and provide a normal life—a place where love abounded along with food, drink, clothes and happiness...
She’d fought for both those dreams and been beaten both times. Still had the bruises. So she might have learnt the hard way, but she’d sucked the lesson right up.
‘Yes, it is.’ His voice was hard. ‘But you should still fight injustice. You owe it yourself.’
‘No! What I owe myself is to not let my life be wiped out.’ Again. ‘I’ve worked hard to get where I am now, and I will not throw it away.’
‘I don’t see how denying these allegations equates to chucking your life away. Unless...’
A deep slash creased his brow and she could almost hear the cogs of his brain click into gear. For a crazy moment she considered breaking into a dance to distract him. But then...
‘Has he forced you to silence? Threatened you?’
Ethan started to pace, his strides covering the resin floor from the grill station with its burnished charbroiler to the sauté station where she stood.
‘Is that why you aren’t fighting this? Why you haven’t refuted the rubbish in the papers? Why Farlane knows he can slate you with impunity and guarantee he’ll come up drenched in the scent of roses.’
Just freaking fabulous—he’d worked it out. ‘Leave it, Ethan. It doesn’t matter. This is my choice. To not add more logs to already fiery flames.’
His expulsion of breath tinged the air with impatience. ‘That’s a pretty crummy choice.’
‘Easy for you to say. You’re the multimillionaire head of a global business and best mates with the Rafael Martinezes of the world.’
‘That is irrelevant. I would take Hugh Farlane down, whatever my bank balance and connections, because he is a bully. The kind of man who uses his power to hurt and terrorise others.’
Ruby blinked; the ice in his voice had caused the hairs on her arms to stand to attention.
‘If you don’t stand up to him he will do this to someone else. Bully them, harass them, scare them.’
‘No, he won’t.’
‘You don’t know that.’
‘Yes, I do...’
Ruby hesitated, tried to tell herself that common sense dictated she end this exchange here and now. But, she couldn’t. Her tummy churned in repudiation of the disappointment in his gaze, the flick of disdain in his tone.
‘The whole engagement was a set-up.’
The taste of mortification was bitter on her tongue as the words were blurted out.
Ethan frowned. You two were faking a relationship?’
‘No. We weren’t faking. Hugh was. It was a publicity stunt—he needed an urgent image-change. His public were disenchanted with his womanising and his sex addiction. Hugh was keen to get into the more serious side of acting as well, and he wanted to impress the Forsythe sisters, who are notorious for their high moral standards. So he figured he’d get engaged to someone “normal”. I fell for it. Hook line and sinker.’
His jaw clenched. ‘So it was a scam?’
‘Yup. I thought he loved me—in reality he was using me.’
Story of her life.
‘I resigned because he asked me to—so that I could be by his side. He told me it was to help him. To keep him from the temptation to stray. But really it was all about the publicity. I can’t believe I didn’t see it. Hugh Farlane...rich, famous...a man who could have any woman he wanted...decided to sweep me off my feet, to change his whole lifestyle, marry me. He said we would live happily ever after with lots of sproglets.’ She shook her head. ‘I of all people should have known the stupidity of believing that.’
Her own parents hadn’t loved her enough to change their lifestyles—despite their endless promises to quit, their addictions had held sway over their world. Rendered them immoral and uncaring of anything except the whereabouts of their next fix.
‘How did you find out?’
Ethan’s voice pulled her back to the present.
‘He “confessed” when I found him in bed with another woman. A hooker, no less. Turned out he’d been sleeping around the whole time. He’d told me that he wanted to wait to sleep with me until we got married, to prove I was “different”.’
Little wonder her cheeks were burning—she’d accepted Hugh’s declaration as further evidence of his feelings for her, of his willingness to change his lifestyle for her, and her soul had sung.
‘In reality it was so that he could be free at night for some extracurricular action between the sheets.’
For a second a flicker of relief crossed his face, before sheer contempt hardened his features to granite. Both emotions she fully grasped. If she’d actually slept with Hugh she would feel even more besmirched than she already did. As for contempt—she’d been through every shade, though each one had been tinted with a healthy dose of self-castigation at her own stupidity.
‘Anyway, once I got over the shock I chucked the ring at him, advised him to pay the woman with it and left. Then his publicity machine swung into action. Hugh’s first gambit was to apologise. It was cringeworthy. Next up, ironically enough, he offered to pay me to play the role of his fiancée. When I refused, it all got a bit ugly.’
Ethan halted, his jaw and hands clenched. ‘You want me to go and find him? Drag him here and make him grovel?’
‘No!’
But his words had loosed a thrill into her veins—there was no doubt in her mind that he would do exactly that. For a second she lingered on the satisfying image of a kowtowing Hugh Farlane and she gave a sudden gurgle of laughter.
‘I appreciate it, but no—thank you. The point is he said he’d never bother to pull a publicity stunt like this again. So I don’t need to make a stand for the greater good. To be honest, I just want it to blow over; I want the threats and the hatred to stop.’
Ethan drummed his fingers on the counter and her flesh goosebumped at his proximity, at the level of anger that buzzed off him. It was an anger with a depth that filled her with the urge to try to soothe him. Instinct told her this went deeper than outrage on her behalf, and her hand rose to reach out and touch him. Rested on his forearm.