Anything to Have You

Chapter Twenty-Four (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty-Five (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty-Six (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty-Seven (#litres_trial_promo)

Part V (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twenty-Eight (#litres_trial_promo)

Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)

“It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.”

—William Blake

Part I

NATALIE

CHAPTER ONE

End of January, Senior Year

I HEARD HER before I saw her. Music blasted from inside her car despite the fact that she was in a quiet neighborhood. I climbed in, and she turned down the volume.

“So fucking cold outside,” Brooke said as I buckled my seat belt.

“It’s winter, it’s supposed to be cold outside.”

She rolled her eyes and turned around in my driveway. “I’m moving to, like, California or something. I can’t stand this. Okay, so,” she said. “Justin continues to not notice me, despite my employment of slutty tank tops.”

“Who cares about Justin? He’s a junior, for one thing, and he’s related to Reed, which means he’s likely insane.”

“And I really thought this bra would do the trick, too.” She ignored me and pushed up her push-up. “My tits look totally awesome—there is no explanation for how he has not dropped to his knees in obsession yet. I mean, look at me, I am, like, an adorable fucking snow bunny.”

She raised her eyebrows at me, and I surveyed her pink cheeks, pitch-black mascara, ribbon-blond hair and absurd fluffy white coat.

Only this girl could pull that off.

I sighed as she looked back at the road.

“Well,” I said, “he is also friends with Aiden. Maybe he’s got some kind of...integrity?”

“Hah! That moron? Come on.” She shook her head, no doubt in the world. “He’s not picking up on it or something.”

I doubted that.

“All right, so he’s not aware that you’re trying to get him to want to bang you—”

“I want him to want to bang me. I would never actually do that with him. Ew.”

“Okay...so you want him to want to bang you. Maybe you shouldn’t be doing that.”

“I mean, I know that? But this isn’t about cheating on Aiden. Or breaking up with him or anything. I need to know Justin wants me, and that he would have me if he could.”

“You know that’s insanely selfish, right?”

“It is not.”

“Oh no, it is.”

“It’s an attention thing! Aiden and I have been together for what, like...a year?”

“More than that, but go on.”

“So, I mean, it has gotten a little...stale. And I don’t know...I totally don’t want to not be with him. But sometimes a girl’s got to get some attention on the side. I mean, come on. This is the last semester of high school that we will ever have. Shouldn’t I be living it up, being young and all that?”

“I still don’t understand why you want to stay with him if you need that.”

“Do you really not?”

“No, I don’t! You’re not even eighteen yet, and you’re in a relationship you clearly don’t want to be in. I’m just saying—”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“I am pret-ty stupid.”

“I’m sorry but you wouldn’t!” she said. “You’ve never really even had a boyfriend, Nat!”

“Yeah, that’s because when I know it isn’t right, I don’t stick around because he’s hot or because I wish I had those feelings.”

“Can we not argue about this?”

“We’re not arguing, we’re...discussing.” Things were tense for a split second before we both started laughing. “I’m just saying, I don’t think you should feel trapped into something that’s not right. You know your options are endless, and no one can blame you for wanting to—”

“You’re the one that we should be talking about.”

“Me? Why?”

“Because! You’re a freakin’ hottie with a body and yet you spend all your time at home nowadays.”

“A hottie with a body? What decade are you from? And hey, I’m not at home right now!”

“You know what I mean, Natalie. I don’t get why you do that. I’ll never understand it. You get asked out by guys more often than makes sense for how little you talk to people, and yet you choose to spend time all alone.”

“I choose me, Brooke!” I quoted the public service announcement on unhealthy relationships we had recently been forced to watch. Apparently none of the rest of the video had affected Brooke much.