Rules Of The Game

‘If you want me to, although I can’t see why you didn’t tell him yourself today. Why didn’t you?’

‘I didn’t really get the opportunity. I had to leave because he had a phone call to make.’

‘Umm. Well while he was on he warned me that we can expect a considerable amount of activity up and down the lane for the next few weeks. The manor is practically derelict and he’s getting an architect in to work on it, modernise it.’

Modernise it! Vanessa repressed a brief shudder. She could well imagine the results, a tasteless, brash amalgam of all that was modern and gimmicky. For the first time since she had left Jay’s office reality impinged. They were two people who were worlds apart and until today his world was one she would never have dreamed of wanting to enter. She still didn’t want to. But she did want Jay. The next move was up to him. Would he get in touch with her again once he knew who she really was, or was he too, having second thoughts? Had she only appealed to him as ‘Nadia’ March the famous model?

CHAPTER THREE (#u2bbd2ad7-2c46-5749-a018-a0831d3c6b56)

IT was Gavin who informed her of the exact nature of Jay’s thoughts, when he returned from his meeting with him. They had no work on that day and Vanessa had elected to give the lodge a good cleaning. She had just finished and was sitting down with a cup of coffee when she heard the Volvo in the drive. Gavin got out looking elated, waving a thick bunch of papers.

‘The contract,’ he told her as she opened the door. He grimaced when he saw her coffee mug on the small table in the living room. ‘I think we deserve to celebrate with something a little better than that.’ He glanced at his watch and announced. ‘I’m taking you out to lunch, go and put your glad rags on, and we’ll go.’

Apart from her lemon suit there was little in her wardrobe to deserve the description ‘glad rags’, and in the end she selected a white cotton skirt and a pretty pastel toning tee shirt which had been a cast off from Nadia, who claimed that it was far too big for her.

Although both girls were slender, Nadia maintained an almost flat-chested model’s proportions while Vanessa was more femininely curved, so that the tee shirt fitted snugly to her body.

As they drove through the countryside, now in full bright green June leaf, Vanessa recognised the route to what had been a favourite family haunt— an old coaching inn which had been preserved and remained much as it must have appeared in Dickens’ time.

Because it was mid-week they had no difficulty in getting a table, the landlord immediately recognising both of them. The inn specialised in local produce, Vanessa opted for a sea-food cocktail followed by steak, new potatoes and asparagus, both vegetables being grown locally. They had reached the main course before Gavin started to talk about his meeting with Jay Courtland. He waited for the wine waiter to move away and then started to tell her about the contract. ‘It gives us the exclusive rights to do all the photographic work for Supersport, and all the publicity connected with the team. It’s a relief to know that everything’s tied up legally now,’ he confided to Vanessa. ‘Business has been too slack recently. I suppose London is really the place for a photographer to make a real success.’

‘You’ve been doing very well,’ Vanessa protested.

‘Not as well as you think,’ he told her ruefully. ‘I haven’t wanted to worry you by telling you how much we needed the money from this contract. I only found out after he died that Dad raised his share of the money for that last expedition by mortgaging the house. Unless we pay back a hefty sum this year, the bank could foreclose and we’d lose it.’

‘As bad as that! You should have told me.’

‘And have you worrying yourself to death about losing the lodge?’ He shook his head. ‘I must admit I was beginning to get desperate until I learned about the contract. And he was very nice about the mix-up yesterday. He seemed more amused than annoyed.’

‘You did tell him that I wasn’t Nadia, didn’t you?’

There was a brief silence, and Gavin’s expression changed, his face flushing slightly. ‘You haven’t told him have you?’ Vanessa breathed. ‘Oh Gavin …’

‘Look I know I said I would, but the thing is, Van, he wants you to pose with the team; for a gimmick he said. He was so keen on it that I could hardly turn round and tell him the truth. Not when he’d just said that finding out you were my assistant was what had swung the deal our way. I couldn’t tell him.’

Vanessa went pale, pushing her half empty plate away from her. ‘But Gavin, that’s dishonest. Letting him think I was Nadia …’

‘Not really. It is you he wants to model with the team. After all he’s seen you in the flesh and he hasn’t seen Nadia.’

‘But he thinks I am Nadia,’ Vanessa protested, ‘and the truth is bound to get out. The whole town knows who I am. Unless of course you’re proposing deception on a grand scale.’

He had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. ‘Look Van I know it places you in an awkward position, but what else could I do? There he was saying the contract was ours with one breath and then with the other suggesting that you wouldn’t object to posing with the team as a publicity gimmick.’

‘I can see that it was difficult for you, but surely no more difficult than it’s going to be when he finds out the truth?’

‘Need he do?’ Gavin fiddled awkwardly with his cutlery. ‘Look Nadia’s out of the country at the moment, I checked before we came out, a modelling job in Gambia and besides, she never comes back here. You know that.’

‘Gavin you can’t expect me to deliberately deceive someone; to pretend that I’m someone I’m not. Tell him the truth and if he still wants me to pose, then fine …’

‘I don’t see how I can now.’ Gavin sounded truculent and Vanessa sighed. Her brother didn’t want to admit to Jay Courtland that he had allowed him to believe she was Nadia, and she could understand that, but surely he could see how potentially dangerous it could be to deliberately allow him to go on under the same misconception. Apart from her own dislike of the thought of the deceit and subterfuge necessary to keep up the pretence.

‘Van, I wouldn’t ask if we didn’t have so much at stake, believe me.’

‘But Gavin, we can’t go on deceiving him for ever.’

‘No, I realise that. Once the photographs have been done and I’ve shown him the quality of our work, “Nadia” can disappear and “Van” can return. He might suspect the truth, but as long as we’re discreet he isn’t going to question it—he won’t want to appear that foolish, and besides what harm will it do?’

How could she explain to her brother the delicacy of the situation between herself and Jay? As far as she was concerned there was no justification for deceiving him further, and now it was too late, she cursed herself for not making her identity plain earlier. But if she went to him now and told him the truth it would be humiliating for Gavin, and they could even lose the contract. She was in a cleft stick, faced with Hobson’s choice, neither path appealing to her.

‘Look Van,’ Gavin pressed, sensing that she was weakening. ‘You only need to do it for a week or so, no longer I promise you. You might even enjoy it,’ he added with a grin. ‘Haven’t you always wanted to know how the other half live; what it’s like to be our glamorous, sought-after cousin?’

‘Not at the price of my own integrity,’ she responded smartly, but inside she felt a tiny twinge of despair. He desired her, Jay had told her, but was it her he desired, or was it the woman he thought she was? Was it the cachet of possessing her cousin’s famous face and body that drew him? Would he still want her when he discovered she was simply plain Vanessa? Second best all her life and no competition at all for the glamorous Nadia; a candle in comparison to the sun.

‘I still don’t think it’s right, Gavin,’ she told him slowly.

‘But you’ll do it anyway? Steady, reliable Van, always weighing the pros and cons … Hurry up and finish your meal,’ he commanded her, ‘we’ve got a busy afternoon ahead.

‘Busy?’

‘Umm … If you’re going to be Nadia, you need costuming for the part. The only jeans I’ve ever seen her wearing are designer label. Jay was very curious about why you were behind the camera instead of in front of it. I told him you had wanted a break and that you were helping me out.’

‘Very inventive of you,’ Vanessa said dryly, following her brother as he made to leave their table. He paid the bill and then they were out in the warm June sunshine; the first really warm day they had had and it seemed to be almost criminal to waste it on shopping, but Gavin was adamant. It was just as well he had such decided ideas on fashion because alone she could never have found the enthusiasm to buy the clothes he was pushing at her. She didn’t even like touching them; silk dresses and blouses, fluid sensual clothes that conjured up a vivid impression of her clothes horse cousin. Clothes she would never have chosen in a million years.

‘You know you look just as good as Nadia,’ Gavin commented as he made her parade up and down in front of him, studying each outfit assessingly, ‘in your own way. Where Nadia is sensual, you are innocent. In fact Jay remarked upon it, and said how surprised he’d been by the lack of sensuality which comes over so strongly in your photographs. He seemed to find it very intriguing. We’ll have that one,’ he added, picking out the bright pink taffeta dress with its low cut neckline that she had been wearing. ‘And you’ll need something really grand for the ball.’

‘The ball?’

‘Umm. He announced this morning that once the alterations on the house are finished he intends to give a ball there, proceeds from the sale of the tickets to go to the local children’s home. It promises to be an extremely grand affair, but it’s months away yet, you can get something for that later. You still need a dress for now.’

She tried on a selection of dresses half-heartedly, liking none of them until the assistant brought in the soft silk taffeta sheath. She tried it on in breathless anticipation marvelling at the apparent delicacy of her figure and the undeniable pleasure of wearing something so alluringly feminine.

When she showed it to Gavin at first she thought he didn’t like it. The neckline revealed the smooth sweep of her shoulders and the rounded curves of her breasts, the narrow skirt outlining her hips. A very provocative dress she thought and she held her breath waiting for his comments, asking anxiously when he made none, ‘What’s the matter, is it too sexy, do you think?’

The smile he gave her was faintly crooked. ‘It’s not that, it’s just that I’ve suddenly realised what we’ve all done to you, and what you would have been if there’d been no Nadia, and only a Vanessa. We’ll take it,’ he told the saleswoman.

An hour later they were back at the lodge. Because of the new contract Gavin had some work to do, and rather than sit brooding on the deception she was forced to be party to, Vanessa picked up her Nikon and wandered down into their back garden, finding the gap in the thick beech hedge which gave access to the Manor’s overgrown wood. The wood had always been a favourite place of sanctuary during her childhood, a place where she could be alone to think and dream, and now she needed its solace once more. She had picked up her camera more out of habit more than anything else, but as she wandered along the overgrown bramble and nettle bordered paths she was glad that she had. Soon this small wilderness would be gone; this might be her last opportunity to record what had once been her secret place of refuge. Soon Jay Courtland and her false identity as Nadia were pushed to the back of her mind as she worked busily photographing the ancient oaks, the small, still pool where she had watched ducklings hatch; the stream where otters played and she had once seen a kingfisher. Gavin had once brought her here at night to watch the badgers, a truly magical experience; soon she was lost, wrapped in the dense silence of her surroundings transported from the materialistic and often alien world outside.