He nodded. “It was a waste, really. He was a smart guy. He should have had a better life.”
“Yes.”
He gazed at her levelly, wondering if he really wanted to get into the next level of this discussion. Did he want to cut a vein and just let it bleed all over the night? Not really. But he might as well explain a little more about why he’d been the way he was when they were younger.
“You know, for years I really was leery of having a relationship with a woman that lasted more than twenty minutes. It just didn’t seem worth the risk from what I’d seen.”
She wrinkled her nose at him, as if she thought he was being silly. Still, he plowed on.
“But I have a new perspective on it now. I spent the last eighteen months or so in Singapore working with a great guy name George who is married to a wonderful woman named Peggy. I lived in their house and saw their entire interaction, and it helped me understand that decent, loving relationships are possible. I had to look harder at myself and wonder if I had what it takes to have that. I mean, it may be possible, but is it possible for me?”
Jill stared at him. She’d had no idea he had such deep misgivings about lifetime relationships. It made her want to reach out to him, to hold his hand and reassure him. There were plenty of women in the world who didn’t treat men the way his mother had. Didn’t he know that?
“And what did you decide?” she asked tentatively.
He flashed her a quick grin. “The verdict isn’t in yet.”
She started to argue about that, but she stopped herself. How could she wrestle him out of opinions that had developed from real life experiences? She didn’t have as many bad ones as he did. Maybe it got harder as they piled up.
“Where’s your mother now?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I’m not sure. I think she moved to Florida to live with her sister, but we don’t keep in touch.”
She thought that was a mistake, but she held her tongue. Maybe later she would try to talk to him about how much could be lost when you lost your parents. Instead of going into it directly, she decided to tell him about her background.
“Here’s what happened to me,” she said. “And Sara. When my mother was alive, we were a happy family. At least, that’s the way I remember it. But my father’s second marriage was a horror show right from the beginning. That’s why Sara and I never warmed to our stepmother, Lorraine.” She shook her head.
“She was such a terrible choice for him. And it probably didn’t help the marriage that we couldn’t like her. He was a good guy, gentle, warm. And she was a shrew.”
“Wow,” he said, somewhat taken aback. He wasn’t used to such strong disapproval from Jill. “That’s a pretty negative judgment on the woman.”
She shrugged. “Of course, I saw the whole thing through the perspective of a child who had lost her mother and found her father bringing home a new, updated version that didn’t please her at all. We were very resentful and probably didn’t give her much of a chance, especially after she had a baby. Little Kelly was cute, but it didn’t make up for Lorraine. And she didn’t like us any better than we liked her and she made it pretty obvious.”
“Little Kelly is the one who died last week in a car crash?”
She nodded. “The one I wish we’d been kinder to.” She shrugged, but her eyes were sad and haunted. “Too late now.” She looked at him again. “And that’s what I want you to think about. Don’t wait until it’s too late to contact your mother again.”
He gave her a quizzical look. “Okay. Point taken.”
She nodded, then yawned. He smiled.
“You look like a sleepy princess.”
She’d traded in her uniform for a short fuzzy robe over the long lacy white nightgown and she looked adorable to him.
“What?” she said, laughing.
“In that gown thing. Even with the little robe over it. You look like you should be in a castle.”
She was blushing. Connor had a way of letting her know how pretty he thought she was and she was so hungry for that, it almost brought tears to her eyes.
She smiled back. “I guess we’d better go to bed.”
“You’re right. We need sleep. I’m only glad we survived the day.”
He rose and turned to pull her up beside him and he didn’t let go of her hands once they were standing face-to-face, looking at each other.
“I’m glad you came back,” she told him, her breath catching in her throat as her pulse began to race. Was he going to kiss her? Or was she going to have to do it herself?
“Me, too.” His eyes went so dark, they could have been black instead of blue. He leaned closer, pulling her body up hard against his. “Jill...” he began, and at the same moment, the cell phone in his pocket began to vibrate.
She felt it right away. Sharply drawing in her breath, she stepped back and looked at him. He pulled the phone out, looking for a place to set it down. She reached out and took it from him. Flipping it up, she glanced at the screen and handed it back to him.
“Message for you,” she said, and her voice showed no emotion. “How interesting. It’s Brad.” Her face didn’t reveal a thing, but her eyes were strangely hooded as she turned away and started for the stairs. “Good night,” she said over her shoulder.
He cringed, though he wouldn’t show it. He stuck the phone back in his pocket and didn’t answer it. He hadn’t been answering Brad’s calls all day. Why should he start now?
But he wished she hadn’t seen that.
CHAPTER EIGHT (#u1ad57c9d-4828-5ebb-a3c1-a037efa478bd)
SLEEPING ON THE couch was getting old fast. Connor stretched and hit the armrest before he had his legs out straight.
“Ouch,” he muttered grumpily, wondering why he was awake so early when he was still so tired. Then he noticed the problem. The twins were running around the furniture and yelling at the top of their lungs. He groaned. He really preferred a normal alarm clock.
He opened his eyes just enough to see them. They were pretty cute. But loud. He was going to have to give up any chance for more sleep. He stretched again.
“Great game, kids,” he told them groggily, swinging his legs over the side of the couch and sitting up with a yawn.
The boys stopped and stared at him. He stared back. Tanner pretended to bark like a puppy. Timmy made a sound like a growling monster. He shook his head. They wanted him to respond. He could tell. And he couldn’t resist.
Just like the day before, he burst up off the couch, waving the covers to make himself look huge, and gave them a monster growl they wouldn’t soon forget.
They screamed with scared happiness and charged out of the room, pushing and shoving to both fit through the door at once.
Jill came in and glared at him. “They won’t be able to eat their breakfast if you rile them up too much,” she warned.
He waved his sheet-covered arms at her and growled. She shook her head and rolled her eyes.
“How come you’re not scared?” he complained.
“Because you look so ridiculous,” she told him. She laughed softly, letting her gaze slide over his beautiful body. What on earth did he do in Singapore that kept him so fit? His muscles were hard and rounded and tan and a lot of that was on display. His chest was all male and his pajama bottoms hung low on his hips. He took her breath away.
“But you do look cute as a scary monster,” she allowed, trying to avoid an overdose of his sexiness by looking away. “We might be able to use your skills at Halloween.”
“Hey, no fair,” he said as he looked her over sleepily. “You already changed out of your princess dress.”
“I’m going incognito for the day,” she told him. “They don’t let princesses bake Bundt cakes.”