The Amish Mother

She paused, closed her eyes and prayed. Please, Lord, help us to become a family. Don’t let me lose everything I gained when I married Abraham. A family. A home. Children who needed her.

Mary Ruth’s and Hannah’s sweet behavior would have made her feel at peace, if not for the knowledge that Zack would return soon and disturb the life she’d made for herself with the children.

Ah, Abraham, I’m sorry. ’Twas my fault that you’re no longer with us.

Tears filled her eyes as she plied needle to cloth in tiny, even stitches. She recalled her husband’s face and his eyes, which had eventually looked at her with more than kindness, with caring that had turned into love. In the months before he died, Abraham had begun to see her as a wife rather than a housekeeper and helpmate.

She sniffed as she set down her sewing and rose. She was tired. She undressed by candlelight, carefully removing the straight pins securing her dress, and got ready for bed. She brushed her hair, recalling with a smile when she’d brushed out her youngest daughter’s hair earlier.

Her hip ached and she reached for the menthol and camphor salve to rub on the sore and swollen joint. The scent was strong, but she was used to it, welcomed it because any little pain relief was worth it. She could take aspirin or ibuprofen, but she’d used so much of it recently, she decided it was best to save it for when the pain became unbearable without it.

She moved toward the bed, pulled back the quilt and climbed onto the mattress. She heard a gentle knock on her bedroom door. “Ja?”

“Mam?” The door swung open, and her youngest daughter, Anne, peeked inside, holding a flashlight.

“Anne,” Lizzie murmured. She waved her in. “What’s wrong?”

Her daughter approached the bed. “Mam, do you think our grossmama will like us?”

Lizzie smiled reassuringly. “She will love you,” she said, believing it to be true. “You are her granddaughter. All of you children are her grandchildren. Why wouldn’t she love you? Love all of her kins kinner?”

Annie tilted her head as she regarded her with unusually grown-up eyes. “Will she love you, too?”

Lizzie smiled, unable to assure her when she didn’t know. “You are worrying too much, Anne. They will come and all will be well.”

The child smiled. “I am glad. I want us all to be happy together. It is time for us—you—to be happy.”

Lizzie reached for the girl’s hand, pulled her close. “I am happy,” she said sincerely. “You and your sisters and brooders make me very happy.”

“Even though Mary Ruth can be sharp to you?”

She nodded. “Ja, no matter what. I am happy with you all, and I love you.”

Anne grinned and leaned over to hug her. “I love you, Mam.”

Lizzie closed her eyes as she held on to her daughter. “I love you. You all are everything a mudder could ask for and more.” She released her child to pat her cheek. “Now run off to bed. We’ve a busy day tomorrow.”

Annie nodded vigorously and spun to race out of the room, pausing on the threshold to glance back at Lizzie. “Danki.”

Lizzie raised her eyebrows in question.

“For being my mam,” Anne explained before she hurried on and shut the door behind her.

Lizzie blinked against happy tears as she leaned to blow out the candle. As the room plunged into darkness, she relaxed and lay back against her pillow. She felt sleepy and hopeful for the first time in a long while.

* * *

The next morning she was up and ready to begin her day. Now that the dawdi haus was prepared for guests, she needed to clean the farmhouse. She made breakfast first, and soon the children joined her in the kitchen, ready to eat. Lizzie beamed at them as they sat down.

“Hungry?” she asked. “I made pancakes, bacon, sausage and eggs.”

“It looks goot,” Hannah said.

“It tastes goot.” Matt had grabbed a piece of bacon and popped it into his mouth.

“Matthew, mind your manners and put some on your plate.”

“Ja, Lizzie.” Matt nodded, looking solemn, and then he grinned.

Lizzie laughed; she couldn’t help it. The boy was looking at her with such delight that the pure joy of the moment deeply touched her. It was nice to hear laughter in the house again.

Her older children helped the younger ones get their food. Lizzie watched with fondness as Rebecca cut up little Jonas’s pancakes for him.

This is what family is about, she thought. Had she ever felt so lighthearted when she was a girl? She couldn’t recall laughing at the dinner table. Her mother had treated her differently than her siblings because of her disability. It was as if she’d been unable to accept that her daughter wasn’t perfect.

“Anne, be careful with your milk,” Lizzie warned without anger.

Anne set her glass down and smiled at her with milk-mustached lips. “When do ya think Onkel will be here?” she asked.

“Onkel Zack,” Hannah corrected.

Lizzie sat down and filled her plate. “I don’t know. Surely by next week.”

“What else must we do to be ready for him?” Hannah asked.

Lizzie looked at her fondly. “I thought we should clean our haus next. We wouldn’t want Onkel Zack, Grossmama and Endie Esther to see a dirty haus, would we?”

“Nay!” the children chorused. The family teased each other as they ate breakfast, and when they were done, Lizzie and her daughters rose and tackled the kitchen first before moving on to clean the rest of the house. She sent the boys outside to make sure that there were no sticks in the yard and the porch was free of any balls and play items. She’d asked Matt to check the honeysuckle bush near her vegetable garden to see if it needed to be pruned back.

Later that afternoon when the children were at the kitchen table enjoying a snack, Lizzie heard a car in the barnyard. She hurried toward the door in time to see Zachariah Fisher climb out of the front passenger side of the vehicle and then reach to open the back door. A woman alighted as Zack went to the trunk and waited while the driver met him. The Englisher lifted out two suitcases and set them on the ground.

She saw Zack exchange words with the driver. Then he and the woman approached the house. Lizzie stepped out onto the porch to meet them. She heard the children behind her, chatting happily after seeing who had returned.

Lizzie was startled to see him. She hadn’t expected him back so soon. His gaze locked with hers as he drew closer. Her heart started to pound hard.

Chapter Three (#ulink_13dcf876-4a83-56bf-aaa4-1c926bacc48d)

He inclined his head. “Lizzie.”

She swallowed against a suddenly dry throat. “Zack.”

He drew the woman forward. Lizzie saw that she was older than Zachariah but not enough to be his mother. “This is—”

“Esther,” Lizzie said with a smile. “Your schweschter.” She was pleased to note Zack’s surprise when she’d addressed his sister by name. “We’re glad you could come and stay with us.”

Esther’s gaze warmed. “And you’re Lizzie.”

Lizzie nodded. “Are you hungry? May I offer you a snack to hold you until supper? There are cookies and apple crisp. The cottage is ready for you. I believe you’ll be comfortable there.”