His Very Own Baby

“It’s obvious you never loved me. Because you couldn’t bring yourself to marry me, I was denied the thrill of watching him grow inside you over the nine months you were pregnant. That’s not something I’m going to forget. But it’s in the past.

“All that matters now is that I love him. I plan to fight for him, Blaire. I know I can win. I have friends in high places, and I have the kind of money it takes to get what I want.

“I hope I’ve made it clear I want my son. When you call Rick, you tell him that for me. No matter how accommodating he’s been, let’s be honest. If he’s any kind of a man, he’ll prefer making his own babies with you.

“Here!” He reached in his trouser pocket and tossed his cell phone on the other bed. “Be my guest. Since I’m planning to stay the night, you’ll need to go in the bathroom and shut the door if you don’t want me to overhear your conversation.

“Before you go, toss me that nightgown and I’ll get this little tyke ready for bed. He just gave me a huge yawn, which reminds me how sleepy I am. This has been quite a day for both of us, hasn’t it, son.”

She struggled for breath. “You can’t stay here, Alik!”

“What are you worried about? I’m certainly not about to leap on an unwilling woman who left me and ran away because she couldn’t stand the sight of me. Remind Rick of that fact when he tells you he doesn’t approve of your spending the night in the same room with me.

“Of course if it’s a case of your sensibilities being offended now that you’re wearing his ring, you’re welcome to book another room for yourself. I’ll pay for it.”

Suffused by the white-hot heat of anger she cried, “I thought by doing the honorable thing that you—”

“No—” He broke in brutally. “You never thought about anyone but Blaire Regan. I suspect Rick is a good deal younger than I am, and doesn’t have a dime to his name. He’s probably panting to get you into bed if he hasn’t already, and is praying I’ll come through with enough child support to set you up.”

“How dare you!”

But those very words crucified her even as she said them because Alik had every right to be in a rage. The damage she’d done to him by breaking their engagement was so much worse than she’d supposed. And now she was forced to perpetuate a lie about a fiancé who didn’t exist. All because she’d wanted Alik to know he had a son. What have I done?

If he fought for custody, his family would get involved. After all his mother had threatened, if she were to find out it was Blaire’s child…

Blaire shuddered, not even wanting to think about that because Alik’s mother would never accept Nicky as a Jarman. The knowledge of his existence would create such enmity between Alik and his family, it would turn into a living horror story.

In the end Alik and Nicky would be the ones who were destroyed. She couldn’t do that to them. She couldn’t let it happen. Right now she needed the wisdom of Solomon to know where to turn, how to stop the precarious situation from escalating.

Feeling physically and emotionally ill, she turned out the light and sank down on top of the other bed to think. But the hopelessness of this nightmare overwhelmed her. Turning her back to Alik, she buried her face in the pillow to stifle her sobs.

After a few minutes, “Once upon a time those tears might have moved me,” came the gravelly male voice out of the darkness. “To have the thing you prized most in life snatched away without warning is a life-changing experience, isn’t it, Blaire? I have to say it’s one you’ve been long overdue.

“Do you know I used to lie awake nights planning different ways I would exact my revenge to make you suffer even one-hundredth of my pain? Little did I know that one day down the road, you would appear in my trailer to supply me with the perfect instrument to inflict that torture back on you.”

Unable to bear the stinging pain any longer, she drew herself upright, smoothing the hair out of her tear-ravaged face.

“Consider your revenge complete, Alik. I’m prepared to grovel because I can’t lose Nicky. He’s my life!”

“You mean Rick isn’t?”

This was one time she had to be totally honest. “Not in the same way.”

“The poor, stupid devil. You’re the kind of woman who needs to wear a warning sign, Love Me At Your Own Peril.”

Every thrust of his rapier tongue ripped apart what little of her heart his family had left intact. Now there was nothing more to shred.

“Name your price,” she said in wooden voice. “Just promise me you won’t bring the courts into it and sue me for full custody of Nicky.” Please don’t do that or your family will find out. “I—I’d rather be dead.”

A long, tension-filled silence ensued. The baby must have fallen asleep in his Alik’s arms. She hadn’t heard a peep out of him.

“That’s an interesting proposition,” he muttered silkily. “Let me think about it. I’ll give you my answer in the morning.” The sound of satisfaction in his tone made her tremble.

While both the baby and Alik slept, she spent the next three hours in a frantic state of torment trying to figure out what his answer would involve. The only possibility that made sense would be if he demanded she live in the same city so they could share custody.

But if he forced her to do that, then her bogus story about a fiancé would be exposed. There was no way on earth she could come up with a fake husband-to-be. It meant she would have to concoct another story about Rick not wanting to leave San Diego, so they’d decided to call off their engagement.

She could hear Alik’s mocking words when she informed him of that particular piece of news.

That makes two down, Blaire. How many more to go before the male of the species learns to look, then run for dear life in the opposite direction.

By the time Nicky started making hungry sounds, she’d come to terms with the fact that she might have to move to Warwick and rent an apartment until Alik’s work took him elsewhere. But whatever she had to do, it was worth it to keep her baby.

As for Alik’s parents, they still wouldn’t have to know anything about his secret child. Thank heaven Long Island was too far away to pose any kind of threat of her being seen in this area of the state.

Out of habit, she got up from the bed and flicked on the light switch to pour Nicky’s formula into a clean bottle. When she turned around Alik was right behind her, their fussy baby propped against his shoulder.

“I want to feed him. Show me what to do.”

He stood too close. She could feel his warmth. The familiar brand of the soap he used in the shower emanated from his bronzed skin, assailing her senses. His shuttered eyes reminded her of the way he used to look at her when his passion had been aroused.

Out of self-preservation she ran for the baby bag. “He needs to have his diaper changed first,” she called over her shoulder. “Lay him down on the quilt and you can do it.”

The next few minutes were instructive as he followed her directions with methodical attention to detail. Dr. Jarman was known as a perfectionist. He would be that way when it came to caring for his son.

Out of the periphery she saw the glow in his eyes, revealing the bursting pride in his little boy who was perfect in every way, shape and form.

When he’d finally managed to slip the baby into a clean shirt and nightgown, she suggested he sit at the head of the bed with Nicky nestled in his left arm.

His daddy had taken a little too long for his liking with all the baby wipes, ointment and powder. Now their son was all worked up and clamored for his food.

Averting her eyes, she placed a clean cloth over Alik’s broad shoulder, careful not to touch him for fear she wouldn’t want to stop. Then she handed him the bottle.

“Go ahead and put it in his mouth. He’ll do the rest. When he’s drunk a third of it, prop him on your shoulder and gently pat his back to get rid of the air bubbles. By the time he has drained the bottle, he’ll be fast asleep again. Give him one more burp and then put him in his crib.

“Be sure to lay him on his back before you cover him with his quilt. The doctor says a lot of infant deaths have been prevented by putting them in that position.”

She stood for a minute to watch. Nicky searched in frustration for the nipple, but couldn’t quite get hold of it.

“Insert it right into his mouth. He’s not a fragile piece of crystal.”

When Alik did her bidding, the baby started devouring his formula. He drank so fast and furiously, he made loud noises that sounded indecent. Alik’s laughter started in his throat and rumbled out to fill the hotel room.

She couldn’t help smiling. “As you’re discovering, he has your healthy appetite.” Before she gave her feelings away, she removed herself to the other bed.

“Do you want me to leave the light on or off?”

“On,” he murmured. “I still have trouble believing he’s real, let alone that he came from one night’s pleasure with you.”