Child Wanted

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. That was probably too personal of a question for me to ask.” She pushed the fabric of her skirt aside to place more of the fish in an empty space, ignoring the way his eyes studied her, making her feel as though he somehow sensed the torment in her soul.

She needed her son in her life, and this magnetic man was her biggest obstacle.

God, please help me.

He took a deep breath, let it out and answered, “I’ve wanted to adopt Jerry for three years now, ever since I saw his story on the news.”

Lindy’s pulse accelerated so quickly she could feel her blood pushing in her veins, but she managed to hang onto the sponge fish and quietly asked, “His story on the news?”

“You may have seen it—” he shrugged “—or not. I made a point to watch for it each night after I heard about what happened. He was just over a year old and had been abused. I couldn’t stand the thought of a child being hurt, beaten by his father.”

“Bless his heart.” Though anyone would make the same statement, no one would mean the words as much as Lindy. She hated that Jerry had been hurt, and she’d done her best to stop it.

She just hadn’t been strong enough.

“I decided that I wanted to take care of him, to adopt him. I wanted to be the kind of father to him that he never had.” He lifted a shoulder. “I missed him this weekend. I just met him, and I missed him already. Hard to believe, huh?”

“Yes.” Did she believe him?

“I went back to Birmingham for the weekend,” he said.

“So you aren’t staying in Claremont?” If he was driving back and forth from Birmingham, a two-hour drive each way, he’d have less time to spend with Jerry.

“Oh, no, I’m staying here for the summer.” He scooted backward to rest against the wall, settling in as though he planned to chat a while. “I just had to go get my things from my house.”

Lindy pushed her back teeth together to fight the urge to frown. He wasn’t driving back and forth each day. And he owned a house. A place where Jerry could live that probably had a neighborhood filled with potential friends, a big backyard where he could play and maybe even keep a puppy, and was undoubtedly located in a good school zone.

The kind of place she’d always wanted to live with her son.

She, on the other hand, was staying rent-free in a small room above the sporting goods store. Free, until you get on your feet, Mrs. Bowers had said.

How long would that take? And would the court believe she could ever get on her feet? Would anyone trust her to take care of her son?

The first attorney she’d contacted after being released had homed in on the fact that would hurt her the most in court. Regardless of whether or not she abused Jerry, she hadn’t stopped Gil or reported him to the authorities. Lindy knew she should have, but she also knew that he would have killed her if she did.

Then who would’ve protected Jerry?

That attorney had turned her case down, but the one from this morning had sounded as though he was considering representing her.

Ethan shifted his large frame against the wall, and Lindy found her attention focusing on his broad shoulders, the hard plates of his chest, visible in spite of his shirt, and biceps that didn’t appear to have come from merely lifting papers in a classroom.

More goose bumps traipsed across her skin. She was so easily captivated by this beautiful man.

“I hadn’t planned on staying here for the summer,” he admitted, while Lindy tried to focus more on his words and less on his appearance. “I actually thought I could pick Jerry up last week, take him home and foster him until the adoption finalized. I went through the ten weeks of fostering certification classes and everything, but then the social worker and the state decided I should spend more time with him first, so he doesn’t end up going through another placement that doesn’t work out.”

She was glad she’d been focusing on his words; she hadn’t heard anything about a prior placement for her son. “What do you mean, another placement that doesn’t work out?” She knew very little about what had happened to her baby over the past three years, but this hint at Jerry’s past didn’t sit well with her. What had happened to him?

“The previous family decided they didn’t want him.” Ethan shook his head. “Gotta tell you, it’d probably be a very good thing if I never meet that couple who’d decided not to keep him.”

Lindy’s stomach instantly churning, she turned to face him as he tucked more fish in and around the blue water. “Why didn’t they want Jerry?” She’d assumed he’d always been in homes like Willow’s Haven. Of course, Lindy had only learned bits and pieces about Jerry’s location from the state social worker who’d had pity on her after she’d been released from Tutwiler Prison. She’d had to put the woman’s cryptic clues together to even find out where the state had placed him. But she’d found him. And now she had to figure out how to get him back in her life permanently.

“Hard to believe, isn’t it?” The concern in his tone sounded sincere. “Apparently, he wasn’t as social as they’d have liked, and he cried too much.” In his left hand was a fish, and Lindy watched as his right one curled into a fist.

Was he like Gil?

“I don’t have any sympathy for people like that, turning their backs on a child because of what he’s been through, as if he could control his past. Kids need someone they can count on.”

Lindy swallowed. “Yes, they do.” And Jerry could count on her. He could. If only a court would agree.

Ethan leaned a few fish against the corner. “I couldn’t wait to get back to Claremont and see Jerry this morning. I think that’s why I showed up so early.” He grinned. “And to help a lady in need with her window display.”

“I don’t need anything,” Lindy said quickly. Too quickly, from the way his eyebrows inched up and his mouth flattened. She cleared her throat. “I mean, I could’ve handled it, but I appreciate the help.”

A lie. An outright lie. But it was out there, and Ethan didn’t look as suspicious, so she let it stand.

Sorry, God. I’m out of my element here, and I’m clearly slipping.

A tap on the window caused both of them to turn toward a little redheaded, freckle-faced boy who was waving, while his mother stood behind him, also waving at the pair in the window. Lindy held up a hand, and Ethan did, as well. Then the two passed by the store and headed toward an old-fashioned barber shop, complete with a red-and-white-striped pole by the entrance.

“Maybe I’ll take Jerry there for a haircut one day, since we’ll be in Claremont for the summer. That’ll be some good father-son bonding, too.” He picked up a green fish and held it toward Lindy as he spoke. “I sure hadn’t planned on spending the summer fishing. Don’t know the first thing about it.” He shrugged slightly and gave an easy grin. “But it’ll be fun learning with my little man.”

His references to her son bothered her immensely, but she did her best to hide the emotion and prayed again that Ted Murrell would take her case, in spite of her inability to pay him anytime in the near future.

A group of children darted across the grass in front of the fountain, and Lindy leaned toward the window. “Is that them?” she whispered anxiously, then felt more anxious being in closer proximity to the man beside her. She cleared her throat and scooted back, glad that he didn’t seem to notice.

The cluster of six or seven kids entered the Tiny Tots Treasure Box, the toy store on the opposite side of the square.

Ethan checked his watch. “We still have twenty minutes until eleven, but I’m anxious to see them, too. Really looking forward to spending time with Jerry again.”

“I saw him yesterday.” She wasn’t sure why she divulged the information, but she’d started now, so she’d finish. “At church. I went to church with Mr. and Mrs. Bowers, and all of the Willow’s Haven kids came together.”

He put the fish against the window and nodded. “Candace mentioned that they all go to Claremont Community Church, and I plan to attend, as well. I couldn’t yesterday, of course, since I was in Birmingham. How did he seem? Did you get a chance to talk to him? I thought he started coming out of his shell a little on Friday.”

His concern seemed so genuine that Lindy was momentarily taken aback. Did he already care about Jerry? Really care?

But then she remembered the doting-father act that Gil put on in public.

“I didn’t get to talk to him.” The words hurt, because she’d hoped to communicate with her little boy, but the Willow’s Haven children all sat together, and Mr. and Mrs. Bowers had kept her busy meeting all of their friends after the service until the bus filled with children had returned to the home.

“Right. I’m sure there were a lot of people at the service. Not sure why I thought you would have talked to my little man.”

The “my little man” thing hurt, but she didn’t want him to think she didn’t care about Jerry. “I would have, but I didn’t get the chance.”

“Well, we’ll both see him—and all of the other kids from Willow’s Haven—soon, won’t we?”

Soon? She’d been counting the minutes. “Yes, we will.”

Scanning the display, he asked, “Do you have fishing rods that go with these practice fish? Maybe we could put a few against the sides so the kids can see them.”