Just Friends To . . . Just Married

“You have a girlfriend, and you think you have to neglect her while you baby me.” She grasped his hand with both of hers. “That’s it, isn’t it? Well, you don’t have to. I’d love to meet her,” she said. “I don’t want to screw up your social life. But that’s exactly what I’m doing. You want to be with her and you have to babysit me.” She felt terrible guilt. “I’m such a selfish—”

“No,” he interrupted gruffly. “You’re not a selfish anything. And there’s no other woman I’d rather…” He paused, cleared his throat. “I have no one serious in my life at the moment, so don’t beat yourself up for no reason. You know me well enough to know if I didn’t want you around I’d…” He paused, looked as though he had a troubling thought.

“You’d tell me?” she prompted.

He glanced at his coffee cup, picked it up and took a gulp, then set it down heavily. “Yeah—right.” After a second, he returned his attention to her face.

She showed her doubt by narrowing her eyes. “I don’t know that I do know that, Jax. I can’t remember you ever telling me to get lost as a kid. And I must have been an awful annoyance at times. A twelve-year-old kid tagging after a fifteen-year-old teenager.” She cuddled up to him, hugging his arm with both of hers. “You never, ever told me to get lost. How could I know you’d tell me to now?”

“I never told you to get lost?”

She smiled. “Never. I would remember because I’d have been crushed.”

He shifted his gaze to the fire. “Apparently I have a high tolerance for awful annoyances.”

“So you’re okay with me being here?”

He watched the fire without speaking.

“Jax?” she coaxed. “Did you hear me? Are you okay with me being here?”

“Sure,” he said quietly. He glanced at her and nodded, his smile brief but as welcome as the fire’s warmth. “Of course.”

“I’m glad.” She lay her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. “Doesn’t the fire smell nice?”

He didn’t respond. At least Kim wasn’t aware of any response. She was exhausted from the emotionally draining day. Stress had taken a toll, sapped her, and Jax’s nearness felt so comforting. When sleep beckoned, she floated toward it, entirely relaxed for the first time in…too tired…to think…

Jax sat motionless, almost not breathing. Kim’s scent coiled around him like a siren with no regard for the mortal soul damned to eternal loneliness by her flagrant yet innocent cruelty. Her breasts, pressed against his arm, burned seductively. His gut clenched with hot desire.

Steeling himself, he glared unseeing into the fire, its mellow, woody smell a poor second to the sweet essence of the woman cuddled there, unknowingly laying waste to his heart. After a mercifully short time, he could tell she slept by the low, even rhythm of her breathing.

To keep from waking her, he carefully disengaged himself from her grasp and lowered her head to a pillow. He covered her with a cashmere throw and turned off the table lamp. For a moment he couldn’t move, so captivated by the sight of flickering firelight setting her hair aglow. A glossy tendril fell across her cheek. With no capacity or desire to resist, he smoothed it away from her face, then kissed the freckled cheek where the curl had rested.

She stirred, sighed, the slight, throaty sound piercing his heart. Abruptly he straightened and grabbed his cup, then retrieved hers. He had two choices, either clean up the kitchen or ravage the woman he wanted desperately not to love. Gritting his teeth on a curse, he distanced himself from her before he did something unforgivably stupid.

CHAPTER FOUR

THE next morning at the office, Tracy made it clear that Jax had seen better days. She was right. He hadn’t slept much last night, either. And as was Tracy’s way, she dragged every bit of information out of him that he was willing to share. The part about the kiss and his urge to debauch a defenseless, sleeping woman remained his guilty secret.

“So Kim’s a professional meeting planner, you say?” Tracy asked, drawing him back from his reverie.

In Jax’s office, where they often ate, the pair lunched on veggie subs, at Tracy-the-health-nut’s insistence. She didn’t consider lunchtime off-limits for strategy planning meetings. At least his office made these business lunches endurable, due to their bird’s-eye view of Lake Michigan.

“Yes, she’s a meeting planner,” he said.

“That could work for us.” Tracy sipped her herb tea.

He didn’t understand. “What could work for us?”

“I’m saying we could put your troubling little houseguest to work. Have her be the official hostess for the Japanese CEOs coming to your country place.”

Jax didn’t like the sound of this, and shook his head. “I don’t think—”

“You don’t have to think, Jax Man, because since you mentioned it this morning, I’ve done all the thinking that’s necessary on the subject.” She laid aside the last bit of her sandwich. “I’ve been stewing about this meeting ever since we decided to do it, and I believe Kim fell right into your lap at the perfect time.”

“Stewing?” That wasn’t a word he associated with his take-no-prisoners partner. “What have you been stewing about? Why haven’t I heard about it?”

“Well…” She looked uncharacteristically embarrassed. “It probably seems petty to you, but remember that function last summer when we met with business owners from around the country?”

He nodded. “Sure.”

“Do you remember my complaining about how several of them handed me coats and snapped their fingers at me when they wanted coffee refills. Remember how questions were directed to you and how I was pretty much ignored?”

He frowned. “I think you must be exaggerating.”

“Not really.” She shook her head adamantly. “I’d say a good third of them treated me more like a waitress, a coat-check girl, a secretary, even once a freakin’ babysitter—and you know how I feel about kids—than your partner.” She exhaled loudly, rolling her eyes. “I don’t plan to let that happen again.”

“The Japanese are a very progressive people. I’m sure—”

“You’re probably right, but I’m not willing to take chances.” She eyed him unblinking, her stare deadly. “Have you ever changed the diaper of a baby with the runs? It’s no picnic, Jax. I don’t intend to be thought of as anything this time but your partner. Comprende? Some cultures don’t look at women the way ours does. They have more conservative notions about male vs. female roles and family values. Our Japanese guests may not have the slightest problem thinking of me, and treating me, as their equal. But at that thing last summer, with those good-old-boys snapping their fingers at me like I was a trained dog, well, it was humiliating, So even if there’s only a one-percent chance I’d end up waitressing or holding coats next week, it’s too chancy for me to cope with. I’ve been so worried I’ll be relegated to hostess status, it’s giving me an ulcer.” She banged the table with a fist. “Damn it, Jax, I’m not a waitress or a coat-check girl or a babysitter, and I don’t want those businessmen to assume I’m there for no other reason than to babysit their wives.”

She paused, grim-faced. “I do not intend to stand around serving tea and petit fours, talking about child rearing or husbands, neither of which I know squat about. Nor do I care to know anything. I will not babysit those wives. It’s not in my job description.” She sat back, lolled her head on the chair-back as though spent. “There I’ve said it.” She let out a long, weary exhale, then lifted her head to look him in the eye. “Do not tell me I’m being silly, because if you do, I’ll—I’ll…” She sat forward, aggressively. “I’ll quit. ”

Jax could hardly believe Tracy’s emotional torrent. Poor woman. Obviously Tracy’s summer experience hadn’t been good. She was truly frightened of being minimized at their upcoming conclave of Japanese CEO’s. He laid aside his sandwich and leaned across the corner of the table to touch her fisted hand. “I can’t believe I was so preoccupied with work I didn’t even notice.”

She smiled wanly. “I was a little hurt that you didn’t.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

With his reassuring touch, she visibly relaxed and placed her free hand on his. “You know me. Never admit fear or defeat.”

He grinned. “Yeah, well, from now on make an exception if it involves our partnership. Understood? I’ll have no more talk about quitting.”

She frowned, as though ashamed about her hesitance to reveal her apprehension. “Okay—well, now that you know my deepest, darkest fear, my thinking is, if we get Kim involved, we can kill two birds with one stone. She can get her Jax Fix, mend her fitful little heart and she can also make some money representing the traditional female role of hostess. That will leave me free to act as the equal partner I am. Is that an excellent idea or is it an excellent idea?”

Jax’s initial inclination was to say no, but with Tracy’s extreme anxiety, what could he do? “It isn’t as though the plan isn’t good,” he said, feeling his way. “Except—then Kim would be around that much longer.”

“True.” Tracy nodded. “But has she mentioned leaving anytime soon?”

Jax pursed his lips. Nothing Kim had done or said so far had the earmarks of an impending departure. “No,” he admitted.

“How long does she usually stay for these Jax Fixes?”

He shifted his gaze to stare unseeing out of the window, the view of Lake Michigan blocked by Kim’s face—the way she looked last night, asleep on his sofa. “A week—or two.” He flinched. Having Kim around, looking the way she did in the firelight—seemingly pliant and willing, yet in reality, oblivious and unsubmissive—would be like enduring two weeks crawling over broken glass.

“That’s perfect!” Tracy’s enthusiasm pulled him back in time to see her smile. “She’ll have almost a week to plan, which isn’t much, I’ll grant. But everything as far as food, location and accommodations is already taken care of. She’d really only have to be there to oversee things, watch after the spouses while we’re in meetings. That would be child’s play for a professional like your Kim.” She clapped her hands. “She’s made to order.”

He drummed his fingers, agitated. With this new wrinkle—the possibility of keeping Kim around to utilize her expertise—the burden of anxiety had clearly been passed from Tracy’s shoulders to his.