Fool’s Quest

‘I think she is a bright child,’ I conceded. Then, disloyally, I added, ‘But I am sure that all fathers think their daughters are clever.’

‘Well. Some fathers do. I hope you are one of them. Nettle was startled that her sister was developing very differently from how she had feared. When the news reached me, I was very pleased. And intrigued. I had feared the child would not survive, let alone prosper. But my intent is that we will send for her, and then I can see for myself.’ She folded her hands and rested her chin on her fingers. She waited.

‘Perhaps the next time I come to Buckkeep, I will bring her with me,’ I offered. I hoped my desperation did not sound in my voice. Bee was too little, too different to be brought to court. How much did I dare tell Kettricken?

‘Then you do not intend to stay long with us?’

‘Only until the Fool is hearty enough to endure a Skill-healing.’

‘And you think that will be so soon that your little daughter will not miss you?’

Oh, Kettricken. I did not meet her eyes. ‘Probably later rather than sooner,’ I admitted reluctantly.

‘Then we should send for her now.’

‘Travelling conditions are so harsh now …’

‘There is that. But in a comfortable carriage, accompanied by my personal guard, she might do well. Even through the storms. I am sure they will manage to find respectable inns every night.’

‘You’ve given this a lot of thought.’

The look she gave me implied her plan was immutable. ‘I have,’ she said, and with that settled, she changed the topic. ‘How fares Lord Golden?’

I started to shake my head and then shrugged instead. She had made her plans for Bee, but I would let her distract me while I planned my own campaign. ‘Better than he was, in some ways. Warm, clean, fed, and some of his lesser injuries have begun to heal. But he is still closer to death’s door than to the gates of health.’

For a moment, her years showed on her face. ‘I could scarcely believe it was him. If you had not been there to vouch for it, I would never have suspected it. Fitz, what happened to him? Who did this?’

I wondered if the Fool would want his tale shared. ‘I am still drawing the full tale out of him.’

‘When last I saw him, years ago, he said he would return to the place where he was taught.’

‘And he did.’

‘And they turned on him.’

Kettricken could still take me by surprise with her leaps of intuition. ‘So I believe. Lady Kettricken, I am sure you recall how private a man the Fool was.’

‘And is. I know what you will next suggest, that I visit him myself. And I shall. In truth, I have already called on him twice, and each time found him sleeping. But my visits would be much easier for me if you and Lord Chade had not squirreled him away into your old den. I’m a bit old to be stooping and scuttling through narrow hideaways. Surely he would be better off in a chamber that offered him light and air.’

‘He is fearful of pursuit, even within the stout walls of Buckkeep. I think he will sleep best where he is right now. And as for light, well, it means little to him now.’

She shuddered as if my words were arrows that had struck her. She turned her face away, as if to hide from me the tears that filled her eyes. ‘That grieves me beyond words,’ she choked out.

‘And I.’

‘Is there any hope that with the Skill …?’

The very question I still pondered. ‘I do not know. He is very weak still. I do not wish to restore his sight if it takes the last of his strength and he dies of it. We will have to be very cautious. We have made some small progress already, and as he eats and rests and gains strength, we will do more.’

She nodded violently to that. ‘Please. But, oh, Fitz, why? Why would anyone treat him so?’

‘They thought he knew something, and was keeping it from them.’

‘What?’

I hesitated.

She turned back to face me. Weeping seldom makes a lady lovelier. Her nose had reddened and the rims of her eyes had gone pink. She no longer tried to disguise the tears running down her face. Her voice was harsh. ‘I deserve to know, Fitz. Do not play Chade with me. What secret could possibly be worth resisting what they did to him?’

I looked at my feet, ashamed. She did deserve to know. ‘He knew no secret. He had no knowledge to give them. They demanded to know where his son was. To me he has said that he has no knowledge of any such son.’

‘A son.’ A strange look came over her face, as if she could not decide whether to laugh or weep. ‘So. Are you finally giving a definite answer to the question Starling put to him so many years ago? He is, then, a man?’

I took breath, paused, and then replied, ‘Kettricken, he is what he is. A very private person.’

She cocked her head at me. ‘Well, if the Fool had given birth to a son, I think he would remember that. So that leaves him only the male role.’

I started to say that not every child was fathered in the same way. The thought of how King Verity had borrowed my body to lie with her, leaving me for a night in his old man’s skin, swept through my mind like a storm. I folded my lips on my words and looked aside from her.

‘I will visit him,’ she said quietly.

I nodded, relieved. There was a tap at her door. ‘I should go now, so you may meet your next supplicant.’

‘No, you should stay. The next visitor concerns you.’

I was not entirely surprised when a page ushered Web into the room. He halted inside the door while two serving girls entered with trays of refreshments. They arranged everything on a low table while we all looked at one another. Web scowled briefly at my disguise, and I saw him reorder his impression of the man he had glimpsed last night. It was not the first time he had witnessed me assume a different character. As he evaluated me in my new guise, I studied him as well.

Web had changed since last we had spoken. For a number of years following the death of his Wit-bird Risk, he had not re-partnered. That loss had wrought a change in him. When I had lost my wolf, I felt as if half my soul had gone missing, as if there was too much empty space in both my mind and my body. For a time, I had seen that same emptiness in Web when he and Nettle’s brother Swift would visit Molly and me at Withywoods. His eyes had lost their bird-brightness, and he had walked as if he were anchored to the earth. He had seemed to age decades in a matter of months.

Today he walked with his shoulders squared, and his gaze darted quickly around the room, taking in every detail. The difference was a good one, as if he had rediscovered youth. I found myself smiling at him. ‘Who is she?’ I greeted him.

Web’s eyes met mine. ‘He. Not she. A young kestrel named Soar.’

‘A kestrel. A bird of prey. That must be different for you.’

Web smiled and shook his head, his expression as fond as if he spoke of a child when he said, ‘We both have so much to learn of one another. We have been together less than four months. It is a new life for me, Fitz. His eyesight! Oh, and his appetite and his fierce joy in the hunt.’ He laughed aloud and seemed almost breathless. There was more grey in his hair and deeper lines in his face, but his laugh was a boy’s.

I felt a moment of envy. I recalled the headiness of the first days with a new partner. As a child, I had joined myself to Nosy without the least hesitation, and experienced a summer with the full senses of a young hound amplifying my own. He had been taken from me. Then there had been Smithy, the dog I had bonded to in complete defiance of Burrich and common sense. Lost to me when he gave his life defending my friend. They had been companions to my heart. But it had been Nighteyes the wolf who had wrapped his soul around mine. Together we had hunted and together we had killed, both game and men. The Wit bonded us to all life. From him, I had learned to master both the exhilaration of the hunt and the shared pain of the kill. Recalling that bond, my envy faded. No one could replace him. Could another woman ever be to me what Molly had been? Would I ever have a friend who knew me as the Fool did? No. Such bonds in a man’s life are unique. I found my tongue, ‘I’m happy for you, Web. You look a new man.’

‘I am. And I am as sad for you as you are glad for me. I wish you had a Wit-companion to sustain you in your loss.’

What to say to that? There were no words. ‘Thank you,’ I said quietly. ‘It has been hard.’

Kettricken had kept silent during our exchange but she watched me keenly. The Witmaster found a cushion and lowered himself to sit beside the table. He offered Kettricken a wide smile and then regarded the food with interest.

Kettricken smiled in return. ‘Please, let us not wait for formalities. Be at ease, my friends. It has given me great pleasure to watch Web recover his spirits. You should meet Soar, Fitz. I do not say that he might make you reconsider your decision to remain alone, but he has certainly given me reason to doubt my own un-partnered status.’ She gave a small shake of the head. ‘When I saw the pain you felt at Nighteyes’ passing, I thought I wanted none of that, ever. And again, when Web lost Risk, I told myself that I had been wise to refrain from sharing my heart with an animal, knowing eventually I must feel the tearing pain of departure.’ She lifted her eyes from watching Web pour tea for all of us and met my incredulous gaze. ‘But witnessing Web’s joy in Soar, I wonder. I have been alone so long. I grow no younger. Must this be a regret I take to my grave, that I did not understand fully the magic I possessed?’

She let her words trail away. When she turned to meet my gaze, there were echoes of hurt and anger in her eyes. ‘Yes. I am Witted. And you knew, Fitz. Didn’t you? Long before I suspected, you knew. And you knew the Wit that so endangered Dutiful when he was a boy came from me.’