It’s About Love

What you looking at?

“Strong silent type, are we?” she says, looking away.

I don’t answer, as I walk out into the rain.

I chose to come here.

I chose to catch two buses to reach a college on the other side of town. Mum and Dad didn’t even make me get a job. Dad said as long as I stick it out they’re happy to give me a little allowance, and what I saved from working with Tommy over the summer should last me till Christmas, if I’m clever.

Never had a bus pass before. Never needed one.

They had film studies at the Community College, which I could’ve walked to. But Tommy had started working for his uncle properly as a builder’s apprentice, and Zia had to take the supermarket job to prove to his dad he’s dedicated enough to join the family business, so it’s not like I would’ve been with them anyway. Plus the film course here looked wicked. Theory stuff, but the prospectus said there’d be lots of writing and practical bits too. Maybe I’ll get to make something of all these ideas. That’s why I came. New start. Blank page.

A place far enough away that nobody knows me.

And a place where nobody’s heard his name.

I walk in soaked.

Everyone stares.

I try to tilt my face down without making it obvious.

Get your head up, you idiot.

The tables are arranged in a squared horseshoe facing the front. No more circles and name badges. The teacher guy’s half sitting, half leaning on his desk. I look straight to the back of the room. The umbrella girl’s sitting in the back left-hand corner. The chair next to her is empty.

“Is it raining?” says Teacher Guy.

A few people laugh. I feel my face getting hot as I scan the room for another empty seat. There aren’t any.

“Have a seat, we’re just talking favourite films.” His voice is local, with a bit of somewhere else mixed in. He’s younger than most teachers I’ve known, but what does that really mean? I avoid everyone’s eyes as I walk to the back and sit down next to Umbrella Girl. My socks are soaked and my jeans are stuck to my thighs.

The ring on her finger has something inside the amber, and I think of the mosquito from Jurassic Park. She doesn’t look at me.

Don’t look at her then.

Teacher Guy carries on. “So. We’ve had Twilight, Avatar, and, what was the last one?”

A kid with blond hair and a suntan puts his hand up. “Avengers, sir.”

Teacher Guy points at him. “Right. The Avengers. Thank you. You can put your hand down, and less of the ‘sir’, OK? I’m Noah. We’ll stick to first names, I think.”

Great. Another ‘cool’ teacher who wants to be friends. Call me Noah, I’m just like you, let’s be mates. Tell you what, Noah, let’s not, yeah? Hows about you just teach us a bunch of stuff about film and shove the rest of it—

“Is there anyone here whose favourite film isn’t a huge Hollywood blockbuster? Not that there’s anything wrong with blockbusters, but something different. How about you, at the back?”

He means me. Everyone turns to look.

“Waterboy!” says the blond kid, staring back, and nearly everybody laughs. Hot needles prick my face and my hands ball into fists under the table. I spotted him first day. He looks like he should be in a toothpaste advert.

Teacher Guy’s standing up now, and I can tell he takes care of himself. His hair’s the dark curly bush that mine would be if I let it grow, but he’s got that stubble I’m years away from having. He’s wearing dark jeans and a light blue linen shirt and his shoulders look strong. Noah. I dunno if I could take him, but he’d know he’d been in a fight.

His eyes are on me. Everyone’s are. Umbrella Girl’s turned in her seat. Better choose something good. I can taste rain as I look straight ahead and say, “Leon.”

Noah’s face flickers briefly and his expression changes, like he’s gone from just wanting my answers to trying to see behind my face. Other people in the room look confused as their eyes go from me, to him, then back to me again, and even though I don’t want to be looked at, I feel good. I’ve surprised him. The blond kid’s staring back at Umbrella Girl and I can feel her smiling. Noah’s still looking at me, his head tilted like he’s remembering something. Then he nods. “I see. Interesting choice.”

Umbrella Girl sticks her hand up. “I love that film too, sir, I mean Noah.”

Noah looks at her, then at me, and it’s kind of like everyone else goes out of focus.

“All right then. You two can be partners.”

He claps his hands and everyone’s back.

“Right. Everybody turn to the person next to you. If you don’t know them, introduce yourself. You’ve got fifteen minutes. I want discussions – best films, worst films, important films, funniest films, films that matter. Get everything down, make notes, scribbles, doesn’t matter, no idea is stupid, get talking. Go!”

Shuffling and chatter. The blond kid’s looking back at me again. I wipe my forehead with the back of my hand and cold water runs down to my elbow.

“It’s a love story, you know. Leon,” says Umbrella Girl. She’s doodling on the cover of a new A4 lined pad.

I peel off my jacket and let it hang inside out over the chair. My black T-shirt is dry, but my arms are cold as I take my notebook out of my bag. It’s a new one. Ring bound. I pull my biro out from the binding and open it up, tensing my bicep more than I need to. I don’t look at her. I’m glad she’s on my right. “No, it’s not.”

I start to write the date, like we’re still in school, then scribble it out hoping she didn’t notice.

“Course it is,” she says. “Not a conventional one, but it’s a story about love.”

The fact that she’s even seen it makes me like her, but it’s not a love story.

“It’s about revenge,” I say.

My right arm is still tensed as I scribble over the date again and I can smell cucumber shampoo. Umbrella Girl stops doodling. “No, revenge is what starts it, what she thinks she wants, but it’s about sacrifice. The choice to love.”

I look at her. Who speaks like that?

Her skin’s the colour of wet sand, like Dad’s, and her ear has almost no lobe at the bottom, like an elf’s.

“I guess we saw it differently,” I say.

“Which is why it’s so good! Tragic love story. Amazing soundtrack, too. I’m Leia.”

I blink longer than I should do. You’re kidding me.

She drops her pen and holds out her hand.

Leia? I look around the class. Everyone’s deep in discussion and right now, in the moment, I feel older. Like school was a long time ago.

I shake her hand. It’s smooth and cool and only half the width of mine.