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More Portmanteau Plays
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2018
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JOHN
It was my duty as head of the family to protect you.
NATHANIEL
I didn't ask for protection. I wanted understanding.
JOHN
A boy of eighteen must not be allowed freedom.
NATHANIEL
Perhaps not, John, but he must be allowed to grow toward his goal. Eighteen is not too young for a man to fly through the air in defense of his country, or you. The burden of the world today is on the shoulders of men from eighteen to eighty, share and share alike.... I wanted to be a writer—
JOHN
And our brother Henry wanted to be a musical composer and our sister Emily wanted to be an actress! A fine putout for the leading commercial family of this state!
NATHANIEL
Well, John, our brother and our sister have paid the final penalty. They have died. Henry left a handful of worthless little tunes and Emily left a trunkful of costumes as monuments to their folly. And now Emily's boy is here under your wing.
JOHN
He's a dreamer like all the rest of you.
NATHANIEL (with interest; tenderly)
Yes?
JOHN
He spends all his leisure time playing with that fool toy there.
[He points to the model theatre.
Nathaniel smiles and crosses to the piano and lifts the cloth that covers the theatre; then he looks at the placard and laughs joyously.
NATHANIEL
"Zenobia." " Alexander Jefferson, Sr."
JOHN
He pretends that's his name—Alexander Jefferson, Sr!
NATHANIEL
People like to have other names. Look at all artists—like writers, pugilists, and actors, and base ball players. And the Sr. Is an effort to appear older.
JOHN
Well, I'm breaking him of all that nonsense. I allow him only a certain number of hours for play. Emily used to spoil him and it's been a task to conquer him.
NATHANIEL
Jonathan is fourteen. When I was fourteen—What are Jonathan's tastes?
JOHN
He reads all the time and he wants to write plays and poetry; but I am conquering that silliness.
NATHANIEL
I think I am going to like my nephew. John, I'll come into the house shortly. I think I'll look at this toy a moment and I'll get Aunt Letitia to show me some of Emily's things. A mere matter of sentiment.
JOHN
Now don't put any foolishness into the boy's head.
NATHANIEL
I promise you I sha'n't try to change the boy's head, brother.
JOHN
I play golf from five to six.
NATHANIEL
Oh, you've taken up athletics?
JOHN
The doctor's advice. Will you join me?
NATHANIEL
Thank you, no.
JOHN
Very well. I'll see you at dinner.
NATHANIEL
Thank you. (John goes out. Nathaniel looks musingly at Letitia who has been sitting silently on Emily's trunk, knitting, Nathaniel crosses to her and sits on a stool at her feet) Does John always talk to you so much, little church mouse?
It was my duty as head of the family to protect you.
NATHANIEL
I didn't ask for protection. I wanted understanding.
JOHN
A boy of eighteen must not be allowed freedom.
NATHANIEL
Perhaps not, John, but he must be allowed to grow toward his goal. Eighteen is not too young for a man to fly through the air in defense of his country, or you. The burden of the world today is on the shoulders of men from eighteen to eighty, share and share alike.... I wanted to be a writer—
JOHN
And our brother Henry wanted to be a musical composer and our sister Emily wanted to be an actress! A fine putout for the leading commercial family of this state!
NATHANIEL
Well, John, our brother and our sister have paid the final penalty. They have died. Henry left a handful of worthless little tunes and Emily left a trunkful of costumes as monuments to their folly. And now Emily's boy is here under your wing.
JOHN
He's a dreamer like all the rest of you.
NATHANIEL (with interest; tenderly)
Yes?
JOHN
He spends all his leisure time playing with that fool toy there.
[He points to the model theatre.
Nathaniel smiles and crosses to the piano and lifts the cloth that covers the theatre; then he looks at the placard and laughs joyously.
NATHANIEL
"Zenobia." " Alexander Jefferson, Sr."
JOHN
He pretends that's his name—Alexander Jefferson, Sr!
NATHANIEL
People like to have other names. Look at all artists—like writers, pugilists, and actors, and base ball players. And the Sr. Is an effort to appear older.
JOHN
Well, I'm breaking him of all that nonsense. I allow him only a certain number of hours for play. Emily used to spoil him and it's been a task to conquer him.
NATHANIEL
Jonathan is fourteen. When I was fourteen—What are Jonathan's tastes?
JOHN
He reads all the time and he wants to write plays and poetry; but I am conquering that silliness.
NATHANIEL
I think I am going to like my nephew. John, I'll come into the house shortly. I think I'll look at this toy a moment and I'll get Aunt Letitia to show me some of Emily's things. A mere matter of sentiment.
JOHN
Now don't put any foolishness into the boy's head.
NATHANIEL
I promise you I sha'n't try to change the boy's head, brother.
JOHN
I play golf from five to six.
NATHANIEL
Oh, you've taken up athletics?
JOHN
The doctor's advice. Will you join me?
NATHANIEL
Thank you, no.
JOHN
Very well. I'll see you at dinner.
NATHANIEL
Thank you. (John goes out. Nathaniel looks musingly at Letitia who has been sitting silently on Emily's trunk, knitting, Nathaniel crosses to her and sits on a stool at her feet) Does John always talk to you so much, little church mouse?
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