A Vow, a Ring, a Baby Swing

“Don’t worry about me. I’m a big boy. I know my own mind.”

“Okay, big boy. What are we talking here? Lifetime commitment? Open-ended arrangement? Specific time frame? What?”

He paced to the sofa and stopped to look out the windows as he rubbed the back of his neck. “How about this?” he said, turning back. “We stay together until the baby is born. Then we figure out where we go from there.”

“Renegotiate in six months?” She thought about that. It felt so cold and wrong to consider marriage in the same breath as negotiation, which, as far as she was concerned, was a euphemism for splitsville. The Big D. Divorce. Maybe she was too much of a romantic, but she couldn’t help it. She’d cut her teeth on fairy tales, and that was hard to shake.

“I’m sorry, Steve. I just can’t do this. Not to you.”

“You’re not doing anything to me. It was my idea, remember? This is about you. This is a practical solution to your problem.”

“Practical? Be still my heart.”

“You know what I mean, Ro.”

Yeah, unfortunately she did. She’d always imagined blowing him away with her triple whammy: beauty, brains and body. But over the years she’d seen the women who attracted him and, invariably, they were her complete opposite. Tall, leggy blondes. The night she’d gone to his apartment Rosie had finally gotten the message. She would never be tall enough, or pretty enough, or skinny enough to steal Steve’s heart. And she didn’t even want to get into the hair thing. She didn’t have the time, money, or inclination to make hers straight and golden.

She was what she was. She was okay with being short, curvy and brunette. She’d come to terms with her type. But she would rather face The Look from her parents than marry Steve because it was practical.

Rosie shook her head. “It’s out of the question.”

“You’re still worried about me?”

“Not entirely.”

“Did it occur to you that you would be doing me a favor?”

Her heart gave a little leap. Maybe she had jumped to conclusions. Maybe he did care for her. Maybe this wasn’t merely a sensible solution. He could have feelings for her. Stranger things happened.

“How would this be a favor for you?” she asked cautiously.

“Your parents.”

Rosie felt like a punctured balloon. Deflated. Her tiny bubble of hope collapsed. “What about them?”

“If you have a husband when you tell them about the baby, it will save them anxiety. I’m in their debt, Rosie. If it wasn’t for Flo and Tom, it’s anyone’s guess what my life would be like today.”

“So this is like that thing where you save someone’s life and they own you forever.”

“Sort of. But I don’t feel like I’m their lackey,” he said with a fleeting grin. “This is definitely payback. I owe them more than I can ever repay.”

“If you knew my parents the way you think you do, you would know that they’d never ask you to sacrifice yourself on their behalf.”

Her voice trembled on the last word and Rosie caught her lip between her teeth. She had experienced some low moments where Steve Schafer was concerned, but this had to be the world’s-record, low-down, bottom-of-the-lake, slimy low. She would probably live to regret this, but a girl had her pride. She wanted to receive a proposal that in some way reflected his tender feelings about her. Steve was asking her to marry him for her parents’ sake. It was too humiliating.

“I know you’re sincere. Truly I do. I care about my parents, too. But they’re tough. They’ll get through this like every other crisis they’ve weathered. Together. My answer has to be no.”

“For God’s sake, Rosie, be reasonable.”

“I think I’m being exceptionally reasonable under the circumstances. Let me ask you something.”

“Shoot,” he said.

“What about love?”

“What’s that got to do with anything?”

“It has everything to do with everything, especially marriage. It should be the reason two people tie the knot, jump the broom, get hitched.”

“I don’t believe this.” He turned away and paced in front of the windows, the same place she’d worn a path earlier.

Suddenly Rosie was exhausted. “Go home, Steve. I’m fine. Your work here is finished.”

He stopped and looked at her. “I already told you, I’m not leaving without you.”

“And I told you that I’m not going home yet.” She practically collapsed onto the love seat as if to say, “And you can’t make me.” That’s mature, she thought.

He sat on the couch at a right angle to her, his knees barely touching hers. Leaning forward earnestly, he rested his elbows on his thighs. It was such a profoundly masculine pose that she felt a tiny catch in her chest, a slight escalation in her breathing.

“It’s the right thing to do,” he said.

“By ‘it,’ I assume you mean marriage?” she asked.

When he nodded, she acknowledged that he must be serious. Would it be easier to believe if he were down on one knee? Then it hit her why she was so adamant about not marrying him. She knew better than to believe for even a second that his motives had anything to do with tender feelings for her. From the time she was a little girl following him and Nick everywhere, she’d believed he walked on water. He had always included her when her brother would have ditched her.

As a vulnerable teenager she’d believed in “happy ever after.” She had imagined Steve Schafer asking her to marry him. He would go down on one knee, take her hand and look longingly into her eyes and “pop the question” because he loved her to distraction. The proposal fantasy had never once consisted of “Yo, babe, let’s get hitched so I can make an honest woman of you.”

Oh, she knew he hadn’t said that. But that’s the way it felt. From the moment he had brought up the subject of marriage, it had been a complete and profound violation of her girlhood dream.