His Girl Next Door: The Army Ranger's Return / New York's Finest Rebel / The Girl from Honeysuckle Farm

“You’re beautiful.”

Jessica closed her eyes and tried not to cry, fighting happiness and tears at the same time. As confused as she’d ever been.

She tried not to shake her head. Thank goodness the light was off so she didn’t have to see the look on his face when he realized.

“You are. You’re more beautiful than I ever could have imagined you’d be.”

Jessica wanted to tell him she wasn’t, admit what he’d find when he took off her final layer, but she held her words in, too scared to say them out loud.

Ryan stopped, as if he were questioning her, but Jess responded by staying still, waiting for him.

She held her breath. Terrified.

When his hand touched her bra, her entire body went stiff, rigid.

She couldn’t do it.

“Stop.”

His hand hovered then fell.

“I can’t, Ryan,” she whispered, distraught.

He dropped his hands to hers, and lowered himself to rest beside her. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

Jessica closed her eyes and pushed away the pain. Tried to figure out what exactly she could tell him.

“I have, well …”

He brushed the back of one hand gently across the side of her face, touching her cheek with the softness of a feather.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

Jessica smiled bravely at him. She did want to, that was the problem, but she didn’t know how to deal with the embarrassment of what he was about to find.

Because even with the lights out, without being able to see, he would be able to feel. The scars were minor, the surgeon had done a great job, but the evidence was real and he would notice. There was no way not to.

She took a deep breath.

“Ryan, I have scars. I don’t want …”

“Shhhh.” He bent forward and kissed her, lips hovering over hers. “You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

She shook her head. “I do. My breasts, they’re …”

He waited, fingers stroking her hair.

“I have scars because I had surgery. My breasts aren’t real,” she finally blurted out.

Ryan didn’t say anything. He dropped another kiss to her lips before trailing his way down her neck, delicately across her collarbone, until he reached the lacy edge of her bra.

He paused and looked up at her. She could make out his face even in the dark.

“You’re beautiful, Jessica, and I don’t care what you’ve had done or about any scars.”

With an incredible sense of relief exploding inside her, her body felt like it had turned into a marshmallow. Her fears faded, and her body responded to his touch again. By his lack of reaction, he obviously just thought she’d had a breast augmentation. Realizing she’d managed to put off telling him the truth for a little longer, she trembled. Right now, he didn’t need to know why she’d had cosmetic surgery. If he didn’t care, then why should she?

Her body still thrummed with tension as he slipped off her underwear, but she forced herself to enjoy his touch. She couldn’t help but stiffen when he kissed first one breast then the other, his fingers gliding softly over her skin.

“See, they’re beautiful, just like I knew they’d be,” he whispered. “Just like the rest of you.”

Jessica finally relaxed into his touch, closed her eyes and sighed as his hands explored her body.

Tonight was about feeling good and enjoying herself. Losing herself in the moment. All this time she’d been terrified of showing someone her new body shape, worried what the reaction would be and if she’d even want to be intimate again.

But this—this was what she’d needed. To feel loved and wanted by a man like Ryan. A man who made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman in the world, like he truly wanted her.

Even if it was only just for tonight. Or until he went away again. Because if the light had been on, she could have looked into his eyes and seen his honesty, his integrity. Yet what she couldn’t see in his eyes, she could feel in his touch.

When Ryan inched his way back up her body and started to kiss her again, she pushed away her barriers, made herself think of nothing but the way he was touching her. The way his fingers felt against her skin, and the way his lips brushed hers in a motion she’d never tire of.

If this wasn’t heaven, then she didn’t know what was.

CHAPTER EIGHT (#ulink_62c14e7d-9007-5bcf-830c-76289fc0cfb4)

Dear Jessica,

It’s funny, now I know I’m coming home for sure and that we’re going to meet. I should have asked you for a photo, but then we probably don’t look like either of us expects.

You know, I’ve enjoyed this life for so long, but now the thought of coming back and sleeping in a comfortable bed, of not having to get up at the crack of dawn, sounds pretty appealing. I can hardly imagine what it will be like not to be with my unit, here in the desert, because it’s been so long. But I’m sure looking forward to meeting you.

I’ll see you soon.

Ryan

RYAN WOKE WITH a smile on his face. It had been a long while since he’d woken up grinning, but then it had also been a long time since his arm had been taken captive by a beautiful woman.

Jessica lay in the crook of his arm, face turned into him, cheek against the edge of his chest. Her mouth was slightly parted, her long hair falling over his skin and spilling out onto the white pillow.

He didn’t move, hardly let himself even breathe. Ryan could have stayed there forever, watching her. Content in what had happened between them. In the way his trip home had turned out after so many months of dreading it, after years of denying himself the luxury of returning. Of putting up barriers and refusing to confront what he’d left.

When he’d promised his son that this tour of duty would be his last, it had been a decision he’d made as a father.

But now? Deep down, he knew that part of that decision had been influenced by how he felt about Jessica. He wanted to come back for his son, but he also wanted more from this woman lying in his arms. Part of his decision had been because he wanted a real chance at making a future with her, too.

And that meant he had to let her in. A week ago, he’d have never thought it possible, but now he wanted to open up to her. To tell her the final chapter he’d kept behind lock and key from everyone but himself until now.

Jessica stirred. He shifted his body to face her, looking at her face as she started to wake.