That was impossible, of course. Tess’s smile waned. She sighed. Some things might be changing in the way women perceived themselves but certain constraints of society could never be breached. One of them was the proper choice of a mate. She had standards to uphold. Duties to fulfill. She had already taken on some of the tasks inherent in running her father’s home, such as acting as hostess when he entertained the hoi polloi of San Francisco. There was no way to continue to do that if she turned her back on her place in the normal scheme of things.
A sadness settled over Tess the way the fog often shrouded the bay. Why was it so easy for her to accept Annie and others like her, yet fail to fully accept the person she herself really was?
Michael didn’t speak to his passengers again until he brought the buggy to a halt in front of the Clark estate. The way he viewed the situation, the less he tried to explain, the better. Besides, he hadn’t had time to sort out his thoughts regarding the astounding way Tess had reacted when he’d raced to the rescue and caught her.
I couldn’t stand back and let her fall, he insisted, wondering if perhaps he should have done just that. He was beginning to see that his strong sense of chivalry might prove to be his undoing—unless he was very, very careful in the future.
It was going to be at least another year, maybe longer, before he’d be financially able to support his mother. If she lost her job at the Clarks’ before that time, it would be a serious hardship. And if Gerald Clark had the slightest notion that his only daughter was being squired all over San Francisco by his cook’s son, that was exactly what would happen.
Michael steeled himself for the berating he was certain Tess would deliver in parting. As long as he remained duly deferential, no matter how much it hurt his pride to do so, he figured the evening would end fairly well, considering.
As he prepared to help the ladies disembark, a young groom joined him and took hold of the mare’s bridle.
Michael first helped Annie down, then offered his hand to Tess. So far, so good, he thought. Then he made the mistake of looking into those lovely eyes once again. They glistened like fresh drops of rain on a rose. And her cheeks reminded him of the velvety pink petals.
He blinked to clear his thoughts, to refocus on the task at hand without making a worse fool of himself than he already had. Unfortunately for him, Tess smiled and his heart sped as a direct result.
“Thank you,” she said pleasantly as she stepped down. “It was good of you to agree to accompany us this evening.”
Michael bowed slightly and released her hand, backing away as he did so. “My pleasure, ladies.”
He heard Annie make a sound that reminded him of wind whistling through a nearly closed window sash. Tess, on the other hand, laughed demurely.
He arched a brow. “Did I say something humorous?”
“Yes. But you did it in a very gentlemanly manner.” She giggled behind her hand. “I’m sorry. It was just so plain that you didn’t want to go, it tickled me to hear you claim it was your pleasure.”
“Perhaps it was the good company I enjoyed rather than your destination.” The instant Michael heard his words he rued them.
“Perhaps.”
“Or perhaps I simply like driving a nice rig.” He gestured at the mare. “That’s a fine animal.”
“Yes. She’s mine.”
“Really? If you chose her, you did well.”
“Thank you.” Instead of leaving him and going inside, she walked to the horse and began stroking its sleek neck with her gloved hand. “Actually, she was one of my father’s but I asked for her for myself. He finally gave her to me on my sixteenth birthday.”
“Nice gift,” Michael said, thinking about how little he was able to afford to give his mother no matter how much he wanted to please and honor her. In contrast, the gift of such a magnificent horse only served to point up the difference between his and Tess’s lives.
“I can have one of the stable boys drive you home, if you’d like,” Tess offered.
Michael shook his head. “That won’t be necessary. I’m used to walking.”
“And it’s almost all downhill from here.”
Boy, is that the truth, he thought, biting his tongue to keep from speaking his mind. It would be downhill for him for sure if he did what his heart and mind kept suggesting. The mere idea of pulling Tess Clark into his arms and kissing her rosy cheek the way he wanted to was enough to make him blush as well as tie his gut in a knot.
It was also a clear warning. There were few things he could do that would be worse than acting the swain. As a matter of fact, right then he couldn’t think of anything that would be more foolish. Or more appealing.
He touched the brim of his cap politely and backed farther away. “I’ll be saying good night, then.”
“Good night,” Tess replied.
Michael knew he had to be imagining the tenderness in her tone and the personal interest in her charming gaze. If there was something unusual there it had to be that she was toying with him, pretending to care to lead him on so she could have a good laugh at his expense.
Well, that was never going to happen. He might be a tad smitten if he were totally honest with himself, but that feeling would pass. Tess would never know her flirting had affected him at all, let alone given him thoughts of courting. He was too smart to yield to such impossible yearnings. Too smart and too determined to triumph on his own. He didn’t need anyone’s influence or money to succeed. He was well on his way to becoming a captain. Nothing else was as important as that.
Not even love?
His jaw clenched. The clomp of his boots echoed hollowly on the sidewalk as he began to trot down the hill toward home, back to the reality that was his daily life. There was no way that he might care that much for Tess, nor she for him. Love was an overrated emotion, anyway. His mother had always insisted that his father had loved her, yet Michael had never seen him demonstrate anything but disrespect—when he was sober. When he was drunk, which was most of the time, he was just plain cruel.
That was another reason why Michael wanted to succeed. It was his fondest wish to provide well for his mother in her old age. She had worked tirelessly to raise him, practically alone, and she had earned a rest. Soon he’d be able to give it to her. Soon he’d get the promotion he’d been working so hard for.
He slowed his pace and began to whistle a tune. His life hadn’t been easy but he’d come a long way since his upbringing as one of the immigrant children who were disparagingly called wharf rats. Someday, Lord willing, he’d be able to put that all behind him and never look back.
Chapter Five
Tess was barely inside the cavernous foyer of the family mansion and was standing in front of the mirrored hall tree removing her hat when she heard a familiar, attention-getting cough.
Annie immediately hiked her skirts and fled up the side stairs toward her own quarters.
Tess whirled to face the source of the cough. “Good evening, Father. How are you?”
“I might ask you the same thing,” Gerald Clark said. He hooked one thumb in his vest pocket, took a puff of the fat cigar in his other hand and blew out a smoke ring as he eyed his daughter from head to toe.
“I’m fine, thank you,” Tess replied. She would gladly have retreated to her room if her father had not placed himself directly in her path. To her chagrin, he was taking note of her meager disguise.
“Have you no decent wrap? I thought you had a much more suitable coat than that old one.”
“It was mother’s,” Tess said.
“I’m well aware of that.” His eyes narrowed in a scowl while he took in the familiar hat with its special, jet pin as part of the decoration. “Are you mocking me?”
Tess’s heart melted and she put aside her personal concerns in order to comfort him. “Oh, Father, it’s nothing like that. Honestly.” She stepped close enough to briefly pat his free hand. “We—Annie and I—just wanted something dark and unremarkable to wear into the city. I never intended for you to see us dressed like this. I would never do anything to hurt you. Surely, you know that.”
“I had thought so, until now,” Gerald answered. “Would you care to tell me why you chose to go out so late in the evening?”
There was nothing Tess could honorably do but answer truthfully. She busied herself removing her gloves so she wouldn’t have to keep staring into his face, wouldn’t see his disappointment when she confessed.
“It was all my idea. I wanted to hear Maud Younger speak at Mechanics’ Pavilion and Annie was good enough to accompany me.” She looked up in time to see a flush of color start rising in the older man’s face.
“So I have been given to understand.”
“Then you know I’m telling you the truth.”
“Yes. I find your actions quite disappointing. What do you have to say for yourself?”