My Secret Life

‘Sex toys, Ms Lang. You look surprised.’

Tressa gaped at him. Surprised? She was shocked, to say the least. ‘Catharsis funded you to look into issues in women’s health care.’

‘Yes, that’s precisely what we’re doing here. Women’s sexual health, to be precise.’

Oh, dear Lord. Tressa’s fingernails bit into her palms. Marco was right. It was exactly like that. She felt blind-sided. Nothing in her preparation for this meeting had indicated this was what was going on at Western University. Had her predecessor known?

She shook her head. ‘I’m sorry, Professor, but Catharsis can’t support something like this.’

As harmless and scholarly as the professor looked, his eyes went steely. ‘Like what? Billions of dollars have been spent studying erectile dysfunction in men. Are you saying, Ms Lang, that women’s sexual satisfaction is unimportant?’

‘Of course not.’ Not when he put it that way.

Walton sighed heavily. ‘Ms Lang, I have five graduate assistants relying on that money to get them to their degrees. Five young, brilliant women, as a matter of fact. Before you decide to cut our funding, at least take the time to learn more.’

Tressa wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do. There was clearly a double standard in play, but where did the ethics stand? He was studying sex toys. She needed to talk to the company’s lawyers and marketing at the very least, but all that attention would put the spotlight on her. This was not how she wanted to start her career as VP.

Her brain clicked fast. ‘Explain to me exactly what the research entails.’

The professor’s eyebrows jumped above the rims of his glasses in hope. ‘I can do more than explain it to you, I can show you.’

She held up her hand. ‘I won’t watch something like this.’

‘Don’t watch. Participate.’

Her mouth dropped open. ‘You want to use sex toys on me?’

‘How old are you?’

‘Thirty-two.’ But that was immaterial. It wasn’t going to happen. Was it?

‘Perfect. I need more data points in that age group. Most of my research subjects are in their early twenties.’

Tressa’s weight shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. She couldn’t actually be considering this – but she was. If the research was on the up and up and she cancelled it, women’s groups would surely come after Catharsis. Yet if the studies were strictly prurient, right-leaning political groups would come out with guns blazing. It was a no-win situation for her. ‘I suppose I should learn more. Let’s just look at our calendars and find a time.’

‘Let’s do it now.’

She stopped short. ‘Now? But …’

‘I don’t have another class for hours, and I do have the protocol established for my next study.’

‘But …’ She couldn’t think of a good excuse. She needed to clear up this mess as quickly and quietly as possible, but Marco was right outside, waiting for her.

Marco.

Oh God. Her body began humming again. What would he say if he found out? What would he do if he learned what had happened in here? In the back of her mind, she could hear him daring her. She’d worked for too long. Wasn’t it time she got some pleasure in return?

‘All right,’ she agreed. ‘But nobody can know about this.’

‘Nobody will. Your identity will be kept confidential.’ The professor’s shoulders relaxed. Now that he’d been given the chance to fight for his funding, he seemed more at ease. ‘I’m sure you’ll be happy with your decision. Is there anything in particular that you like? Is there an erogenous zone I should pay special attention to?’

Tressa squirmed. She’d die before she’d tell this analytical geek what got her off. ‘Where do we start?’

‘You can take off your clothes.’ Walton glanced about the room and drummed his fingers against his chin. ‘I need to get things ready. I wasn’t prepared to run a test case today.’

With that, he left her. Tressa didn’t know whether to laugh or be grateful when the studious man practically forgot her. He began puttering around the desk, and she hesitantly reached for her clothes.

The insanity of it all made her numb.

What was she doing? She was the VP for a Fortune 500 company. Had she seriously just volunteered to be a test subject for sex research?

‘Modesty is unnecessary.’ The professor glanced her way, but then went back to unloading books off a medical table she hadn’t noticed before. ‘I want you to feel secure and open to new experiences.’

With a deep breath, Tressa took off her suit jacket. The top that she’d thought too low-cut went next, but her hands were sweaty as she reached for the clasp of her bra. The need to hide her nakedness became too strong to ignore. She turned her back on the professor and felt her face heat with embarrassment.

Just get it over with, she told herself. It was too late to back out now.

She yanked on the zipper of her skirt with shaking hands. At last, the only thing holding it up were her clenched fists. Taking a deep breath, she lowered the skirt and stepped out of it.

‘The shoes, too,’ Walton said. ‘It arouses some women to keep them on, but I need you comparable to my control case.’

God, could he be more clinical? Still, it was only that impartiality that allowed her to continue stripping. Soon, she was standing in nothing but her skimpy white panties – the ones Marco had liked so much. She looked down at them.

She simply couldn’t.

‘Here, let me assist.’ The professor was suddenly in front of her. Kneeling, he pulled her underwear down to her ankles.

‘Oh!’ Tressa gasped. The cool air touched her private parts, and her nakedness was suddenly overwhelming. She couldn’t take the intimacy. This man was a stranger and his face was practically in her crotch! She covered her breasts with a forearm as her other hand clamped over the light-coloured curls at the juncture of her legs.

‘I need to get some measurements.’ Walton walked to his desk and returned with a notebook, a pencil and a tape measure. ‘Lift your arms, please.’

Lift her arms? She didn’t think so! Remembering the situation, though, forced her to act through her shyness. By fits and starts, she held her arms out to the side. Conflicting emotions ran through her, and she didn’t know quite how she felt about this.

‘Are your nipples always this turgid?’

He flicked one with his pencil, and she jumped. ‘No, not always,’ she stammered.

Instinct made her reach for herself again, but Walton had already wrapped the tape around her and was measuring her bust.

‘I’ll make a note of it. To ensure consistency, next time I’ll have to manipulate them to arousal before I take my measurements.’

Her stomach sucked in hard. Next time? ‘This is a one-time deal.’

He looked at her over the top of his glasses. ‘Yes, well, one can never tell.’

What did he mean by that?

Tressa yelped when he crouched down in front of her to take another reading. She shifted as embarrassment filled her again, only this time the discomfiture was tinged with arousal.