The Mist and the Lightning. Part 16

“How many?!”

“Thirty-two, maybe a little less or a little more. But about thirty-two.”

“Maybe more?”

Lis shook his head.

“No, I remember. Daniel Crassus asked my mother. And then, my father told me too.”

“And when is your birthday?”

“Well, I don’t know the exact number, of course. What? Doesn’t look like it?”

“Honestly, no offense, but no. You look older. And you are a little older than Karina, and you were very young when you met.”

“Yes,” said Lis, “but I fought on the side of the reds for several years then.”

“I thought you were at least thirty-five. It turns out that if not for Nik, you would not have lived to be thirty-five. I would just die of tuberculosis or ulcers.”

“Or died in battle. Kors, what's the difference, only my mother tried to kill me three times and couldn’t, and also Karina. And the red ones. And the blacks wanted to hang me not so long ago. I've been walking on the edge all my life.”

“You really have nine lives!”

“Yeah, and each is crappy.”

“I don’t argue, you have experienced a lot of humiliation and suffering, and they didn’t make you better, but only embittered you. I'm sorry. But you had your father's respect. You had the power and you were the winner.”

“Yes, I had no less than you, Kors.”

“Again you are measuring against others. What a habit – to constantly compare yourself with others! To each his own. You know, Nik and Arel also despise people, they don’t care how great a person is, for them he is still a leather bag of shit. And for you, all people are better than you. Maybe you should learn from the Demon and stop considering others so glorious, stop trying to prove to people that you are no worse than them?”

“When will you stop teaching? Read your lectures on how who should behave? You teach all the time. Is this your support?”

“I will ask for you! Even if I get punished for it. I'm already painted and decorated as well as you.”

“Yes,” said Lis, “the game was equal, two pieces of shit played it.”

“Stop it! Lis!”

“Why did you stop calling me Alis?”

“I don’t want. This is your mother’s name, it is… as you say… ignominy.”

Lis chuckled.

“Your mother… she began to engage in this activity, falling into difficult life circumstances, and where was your red father?”

“Kors, he just played with the black girl and forgot about her.”

“She went back to blacks, and they punished her?”

“Yes.”

“Was she in jail?”

“Yes.”

“Where were you at that time?”

“I was with her, women are often imprisoned with their young children, you know. Then we were released.”

“But she was shamefully marked as a whore and made indelible arrows on her eyes, right?”

“What do you think?” said Lis.

“I can't imagine how it feels…”

“Really? You have them drawn on you too.”

Kors swallowed the mockery:

“I seem to be getting used to your unrestrained language. And you know, the name Atley really doesn’t suit you. And the name Sigmer – it is too alien, unusual, this is the name of the reds. Your nickname really suits you best, and even Karina calls you that,” Kors smiled.

And Lis smiled back at him. Seeing his triangular teeth, Kors couldn’t restrain himself and shook his head.

“I now understand that I acted biased. That I was tactless and rude. But you never crushed me in full force, endured. You only hurt me through my daughter.”

“I love her. You began to understand something, but you still didn’t understand about Karina and me. I endure in this relationship! She is my weakness. She will die and I will die!”

“But why, then, are you dragging her everywhere you go and pushing her to the front line?!”

“Yes, because I can’t live without her for a minute!”

“That’s what gives you the strength not to love the Demon, you have Karina! But she also loves you, don’t doubt, I know,” Kors said confidently and remembered about Nija. And about Prince Arel, and Nikto, and Zaf, yeah…

And Lis took a cigarette and silently lit it.

Kors entered the room with the bear on the wall.

Nikto was lying on the bed without moving.

But Kors was determined to ask for Lis with a firm intention to stop this chaos at last.

“Nik?”

Nikto didn’t answer or move.

“Nik, is everything all right?” Kors asked cautiously, something was wrong, and he felt it.