When, in the midst of my revolutions, my eyes will be turned upwards, they will look upon a sky of shadows, and far away in the background huge arches of smoke darker than the darkness itself. I shall see millions of red sparks flitting about, which upon coming near to me will turn into birds of fire;—and this will go on for ever and ever.
It may be that, upon certain gloomy nights of winter, those who have died upon the Place de Grêve may meet together, for is it not their domain? It will be a pale and bleeding crowd, and assuredly I shall not be absent from it. There will be no moon, and we shall all speak in a low voice. The Hotel de Ville will be there, with its mouldering walls, its dilapidated roof, and the clock that had no pity for us.
A guillotine from Hell will be erected, where a demon will execute a headsman. The hour will be four, and we shall form the crowd round the scaffold.
Probably things will be like this. But if the dead do return, in what shapes will they appear? What part of their incomplete and mutilated body will they keep? Which will they choose? Shall the head or the trunk appear as a spectre?
Alas! what has Death done with the soul? What feelings does it leave to it? What has it taken away, and what has it given? Where does he put it? and does he ever lend it the eyes of the flesh to look upon this earth and weep?
O for a priest, a priest who can tell me this;
I want a priest, and a crucifix to kiss,
Always the same, my God!
CHAPTER XL
I have asked them to let me sleep a little, and have thrown myself upon the bed.
I have a rush of blood to the head, which makes rest necessary to me. This is my last sleep in this life. I have had a dream.
I dreamt that it was night, that I was in my study with two or three of my friends, whose names I do not recollect.
My wife was asleep in a room hard by, and our child was with her.
My friends and I spoke in a low voice, so that we might not alarm them.
All of a sudden we heard a strange noise in some other portion of the house; it was like a key being turned quietly, like the creaking of a bolt.
There was something in the sound that alarmed us. We imagined that it might be thieves who had got into the house.
We resolved to search the premises. I rose, took a candle in my hand; my friends followed me one by one. We passed through the bedroom where my wife was sleeping with our child by her side. Then we came to the drawing-room. There was no one there. The family portraits hung upon the wall, which was covered with red paper, motionless in their gilded homes. It seemed to me as if the dining-room door was not in its usual place.
We entered the dining-room, and searched it, I going first. The door that led into the staircase was closed, and so were the windows. Near the stove I noticed that the linen-closet was open, and the door drawn back forming an angle with the wall, as though to conceal something.
This surprised us; we imagined that there was some one hiding behind the door.
I tried to close it, and experienced some resistance. In astonishment I pulled harder, when it yielded suddenly, and behind it we saw a little old woman standing motionless against the wall, her eyes closed, and her arms hanging down in front of her.
She looked hideous, and my hair bristled.
I said, “What are you doing here?”
She made no answer.
I asked, “Who are you?”
She did not reply, nor did she move or unclose her eyes.
My friends said, “No doubt she is in league with those who have broken into the house with some evil design. Upon hearing us coming they fled, but she having been unable to escape hid herself here.”
I again questioned her, but she continued silent, motionless, and sightless.
One of my friends pushed her. She fell to the ground like a log, like some inanimate object.
We pushed her with our feet, then we raised her again, and stood her up against the wall; but she showed no sign of life, and remained dumb to our questions, as though she were deaf.
At last we lost patience; anger began to mingle with our fright.
One of us suggested—
“Put the flame of the candle under her chin.”
I did so; then she half opened one eye, a vague, dull eye with no expression in it.
I moved away the candle, and said—
“Will you answer me now, you old witch?”
The open eye closed again.
“Ah, this is too much,” cried the others. “Give her the candle again—she shall answer us.”
I put the flame again under her chin.
Then she opened both eyes slowly, and gazed upon us all round; then, bending her head abruptly, she blew out the candle with a breath that froze like ice; and at the same instant I felt, in the darkness, three sharp teeth pierce my hand.
I woke trembling, and bathed in a cold perspiration. The good old priest was seated by my side reading his prayer-book.
“Have I slept long?” asked I.
“My son,” replied he, “you have been sleeping an hour. They have brought your child to take leave of you, she is in the adjoining room. She is waiting for you, but I would not let them wake you.”
“My child, my child!” I exclaimed; “bring me my child!”
CHAPTER XLI
She is young and rosy, and has large eyes; she is a pretty child.
She wears a dear little dress that becomes her well.
I have taken her up in my arms, and placed her upon my knees, and kissed her hair.
Why is her mother not with her? She is ill, and her grandmother is ill too.
She gazed upon me with an air of astonishment; she permitted me to caress her, embrace her, and devour her with kisses, but from time to time she cast an uneasy look at her nurse, who was weeping in a corner of the room.
At last I was able to speak.
“Marie!” said I. “My little Marie!”