Nobody

"When did it happen?"

He laughed again. "A fair question. Well, it came about last summer.

You recollect our talk one Sunday in the rain?"

"O yes!" —

"That set me to thinking; and the more I saw of you, – yes, and of Mrs.Armadale, – and the more I heard of you from Mrs. Barclay, the more theconviction forced itself upon my mind, that I was living, and hadalways lived, a fool's life. That was a conclusion easily reached; buthow to become wise was another matter. I resolved to give myself to thestudy till I had found the answer; and that I might do ituninterruptedly, I betook myself to the wilds of Canada, with not muchbaggage beside my gun and my Bible. I hunted and fished; but I studiedmore than I did either. I took time for it too. I was longing to seeyou; but I resolved this subject should be disposed of first. And Igave myself to it, until it was all clear to me. And then I made openprofession of my belief, and took service as one of Christ's declaredservants. That was in Montreal."

"In Montreal!"

"Yes."

"Why did you never say anything about it, then?"

"I am not accustomed to talking on the subject, you know. But, really,I had a reason. I did not want to seem to propitiate your favour by anysuch means; I wished to try my chances with you on my own merits; andthat was also a reason why I made my profession in Montreal. I wantedto do it without delay, it is true; I also wanted to do it quietly. Imean everybody shall know; but I wished you to be the first."

There followed a silence. Things rushed into and over Lois's mind withsuch a sweep and confusion, that she hardly knew what she was thinkingor feeling. All her positions were knocked away; all her assumptionswere found baseless; her defences had been erected against nothing; herfears and her hopes were alike come to nought. That is, bien entendu,her old fears and her old hopes; and amid the ruins of the latter newones were starting, in equally bewildering confusion. Like little greenheads of daffodils pushing up above the frozen ground, and fairblossoms of hepatica opening beneath a concealing mat of dead leaves.Ah, they would blossom freely by and by; now Lois hardly knew wherethey were or what they were.

Seeing her utterly silent and moveless, Mr. Dillwyn did probably thewisest thing he could do, and drove on. For some time the horsestrotted and the bells jingled; and by too swift approaches thatwilderness of lights which marked the city suburb came nearer andnearer. When it was very near and they had almost entered it, he drewin his reins again and the horses tossed their heads and walked.

"Lois, I think it is fair I should have another answer to my questionnow."

"What question?" she asked hurriedly.

"You know, I was so daring as to ask to have the care of you for therest of your natural life – or of mine. What do you say to it?"

Lois said nothing. She could not find words. Words seemed to tumbleover one another in her mind, – or thoughts did.

"What answer are you going to give me?" he asked again, more gravely.

"You know, Mr. Dillwyn," said Lois stammeringly, "I never thought, – Inever knew before, – I never had any notion, that – that – that youthought so." —

"Thought so?– about what?"

"About me."

"I have thought so about you for a great while."

Silence again. The horses, being by this time pretty well exercised, needed no restraining, and walked for their own pleasure. Everythingwith Lois seemed to be in a whirl.

"And now it becomes necessary to know what you think about me," Mr.

Dillwyn went on, after that pause.

"I am very glad – " Lois said tremulously.

"Of what?"

"That you are a Christian."

"Yes, but," said he, half laughing, "that is not the immediate matterin hand. What do you think of me in my proposed character as having theownership and the care of you?"

"I have never thought of you so," Lois managed to get out. The wordswere rather faint, heard, however, as Mr. Dillwyn's hand came just thenadjusting and tucking in her fur robes, and his face was thereby nearhers.

"And now you do think of me so? – What do you say to me?"

She could not say anything. Never in her life had Lois been at a lossand wrecked in all self-management before.

"You know, it is necessary to say something, that I may know where Istand. I must either stay or go. Will you send me away? or keep me 'forgood,' as the children say?"

The tone was not without a touch of grave anxiety now, and impatientearnestness, which Lois heard well enough and would have answered; butit seemed as if her tongue clave to the roof of her mouth. Mr. Dillwynwaited now for her to speak, keeping the horses at a walk, and bendingdown a little to hear what she would say. One sleigh passed them, thenanother. It became intolerable to Lois.

"I do not want to send you away," she managed finally to say, trembling.

The words, however, were clear and slow-spoken, and Mr. Dillwyn askedno more then. He drove on, and attended to his driving, even went fast; and Lois hardly knew how houses and rocks and vehicles flew past them, till the reins were drawn at Mrs. Wishart's door. Philip whistled; agroom presently appeared from the house and took the horses, and helifted Lois out. As they were going up the steps he asked softly,

"Is that all you are going to say to me?"

"Isn't it enough for to-night?" Lois returned.

"I see you think so," he said, half laughing. "I don't; but, however – Are you going to be alone to-morrow morning, or will you takeanother sleigh ride with me?"

"Mrs. Wishart and Madge are going to Mme. Cisco's matinée."

"At what o'clock?"

"They will leave here at half-past ten."

"Then I will be here before eleven."

The door opened, and with a grip of her hand he turned away.

CHAPTER XLVII

PLANS

Lois went along the hall in that condition of the nerves in which thefeet seem to walk without stepping on anything. She queried what timeit could be; was the evening half gone? or had they possibly not donetea yet? Then the parlour door opened.

"Lois! – is that you? Come along; you are just in time; we are at tea.

Hurry, now!"

Lois went to her room, wishing that she could any way escape going tothe table; she felt as if her friend and her sister would read the newsin her face immediately, and hear it in her voice as soon as she spoke.There was no help for it; she hastened down, and presently perceived toher wonderment that her friends were absolutely without suspicion. Shekept as quiet as possible, and found, happily, that she was veryhungry. Mrs. Wishart and Madge were busy in talk.

"You remember Mr. Caruthers, Lois?" said the former; – "Tom Caruthers, who used to be here so often?"

"Certainly."