Sea Urchins

“I mean,” said the skipper sharply, “one or two things which some people might have been proud of. But I’m proud to say that there isn’t a living soul knows of ‘em.”

“I can quite believe that,” assented the mate, and walked off with an irritating smile.

The skipper was about to follow him, to complain of the needless ambiguity of his remarks, when he was arrested by a disturbance from the foc’sle. In response to the cordial invitation of the cook, the mate and one of the hands from the brig Endeavour, moored alongside, had come aboard and gone below to look at George. The manner in which they were received was a slur upon the hospitality of the John Henry; and they came up hurriedly, declaring that they never wanted to see him again as long as they lived, and shouting offensive remarks behind them as they got over the side of their own vessel.

The skipper walked slowly to the focs’le and put his head down.

“George,” he shouted.

“Sir,” said the hero gruffly.

“Come down into the cabin,” said the other, turning away. “I want to have a little talk with you.”

George rose, and, first uttering some terrible threats against the cook, who bore them with noble fortitude, went on deck and followed the skipper to the cabin.

At his superior’s request he took a seat on the locker, awkwardly enough, but smiled faintly as the skipper produced a bottle and a couple of glasses.

“Your health, George,” said the skipper, as he pushed a glass towards him and raised his own.

“My bes’ respec’s, sir,” said George, allowing the liquor to roll slowly round his mouth before swallowing it. He sighed heavily, and, putting his empty glass on the table, allowed his huge head to roll on his chest.

“Saving life don’t seem to agree with you, George,” said the skipper. “I like modesty, but you seem to me to carry it a trifle too far.”

“It ain’t modesty, sir,” said George; “it’s that fortygraph. When I think o’ that I go ‘ot all over.”

“I shouldn’t let that worry me if I was you, George,” said the other kindly. “Looks ain’t everything.”

“I didn’t mean it that way,” said George very sourly. “My looks is good enough for me. In fact, it is partly owing to my looks, so to speak, that I’m in a mess.”

“A little more rum, George?” said the skipper, whose curiosity was roused. “I don’t want to know your business, far from it. But in my position as cap’n, if any of my crew gets in a mess I consider it’s my duty to lend them a hand out of it, if I can.”

“The world ‘ud be a better place if there was more like you,” said George, waxing sentimental as he sniffed delicately at the fragrant beverage. “If that noosepaper, with them pictures, gets into a certain party’s ‘ands, I’m ruined.”

“Not if I can help it, George,” said the other with great firmness. “How do you mean ruined?”

The seaman set his glass down on the little table, and, leaning over, formed a word with his lips, and then drew back slowly and watched the effect.

“What?” said the skipper.

The other repeated the performance, but beyond seeing that some word of three syllables was indicated the skipper obtained no information.

“You can speak a little louder,” he said somewhat crustily.

“Bigamy!” said George, breathing the word solemnly.

“You?” said the skipper.

George nodded. “And if my first only gets hold of that paper, and sees my phiz and reads my name, I’m done for. There’s my reward for saving a fellow-critter’s life. Seven years.”

“I’m surprised at you, George,” said the skipper sternly. “Such a good wife as you’ve got too.”

“I ain’t saying nothing agin number two,” grumbled George. “It’s number one that didn’t suit. I left her eight years ago. She was a bad ‘un. I took a v’y’ge to Australia furst, just to put her out o’ my mind a bit, an’ I never seed her since. Where am I if she sees all about me in the paper?”

“Is she what you’d call a vindictive woman?” inquired the other. “Nasty-tempered, I mean.”

“Nasty-tempered,” echoed the husband of two. “If that woman could only have me put in gaol she’d stand on ‘er ‘ead for joy.”

“Well, I’ll do what I can for you if the worst comes to the worst,” said the skipper. “You’d better not say anything about this to anybody else.”

“Not me,” said George fervently, as he rose, “an’ o’ course you—”

“You can rely on me,” said the skipper in his most stately fashion.

He thought of the seaman’s confidence several times during the evening, and, being somewhat uncertain of the law as to bigamy, sought information from the master of the Endeavour as they sat in the tetter’s cabin at a quiet game of cribbage. By virtue of several appearances in the law courts with regard to collisions and spoilt cargoes this gentleman had obtained a knowledge of law which made him a recognised authority from London Bridge to the Nore.

It was a delicate matter for the master of the John Henry to broach, and, with the laudable desire of keeping the hero’s secret, he approached it by a most circuitous route. He began with a burglary, followed with an attempted murder, and finally got on the subject of bigamy, via the “Deceased Wife’s Sister Bill.”

“What sort o’ bigamy?” inquired the master of the brig.

“Oh, two wives,” said Captain Thomsett.

“Yes, yes,” said the other, “but are there any mitigating circumstances in the case, so that you could throw yourself on the mercy o’ the court, I mean?”

“My case!” said Thomsett, glaring. “It ain’t for me.”

“Oh, no, o’ course not,” said Captain Stubbs.

“What do you mean by ‘o’ course not’?” demanded the indignant master of the John Henry.

“Your deal,” said Captain Stubbs, pushing the cards over to him.

“You haven’t answered my question,” said Captain Thomsett, regarding him offensively.

“There’s some questions,” said Stubbs slowly, “as is best left unanswered. When you’ve seen as much law as I have, my lad, you’ll know that one of the first principles of English law is, that nobody is bound to commit themselves.”

“Do you mean to say you think it is me?” bellowed Captain Thomsett.

“I mean to say nothing,” said Captain Stubbs, putting his huge hands on the table. “But when a man comes into my cabin and begins to hum an’ haw an’ hint at things, and then begins to ask my advice about bigamy, I can’t help thinking. This is a free country, and there’s no law ag’in thinking. Make a clean breast of it, cap’n, an’ I’ll do what I can for you.”

“You’re a blanked fool,” said Captain Thomsett wrathfully.

Captain Stubbs shook his head gently, and smiled with infinite patience. “P’raps so,” he said modestly. “P’raps so; but there’s one thing I can do, and that is, I can read people.”

“You can read me, I s’pose?” said Thomsett sneeringly.

“Easy, my lad,” said the other, still preserving, though by an obvious effort, his appearance of judicial calm. “I’ve seen your sort before. One in pertikler I call to mind. He’s doing fourteen years now, pore chap. But you needn’t be alarmed, cap’n. Your secret is safe enough with me.”

Captain Thomsett got up and pranced up and down the cabin, but Captain Stubbs remained calm. He had seen that sort before. It was interesting to the student of human nature, and he regarded his visitor with an air of compassionate interest. Then Captain Thomsett resumed his seat, and, to preserve his own fair fame, betrayed that of George.