Be My Baby

She had a kid, she was a mum. Well, that wasn’t surprising. She always wanted that, eventually. It was a timing thing, that was the only problem with them, back in the day. He was glad their issues hadn’t stopped her. The man ran a hand through the rough stubble on his chin and thought about it – well, he’d been the hurt party, she was the one who’d disappeared without a backwards glance or a telephone number. And if he was over it, why shouldn’t he stop by, see an old school friend? Especially when she was only down the road?

It felt like a sign. He’d been asking for a reason, a reason to turn on the lights, to leave the house, to engage his brain in any way. For the first time in the two weeks since he’d been back in the UK, Jamie MacAllister got up and actually smiled.

***

‘You know, Mollie would never have to know,’ Ruby fluttered her eyelashes and leaned in towards Jamie, her lips pouting.

Jamie snorted, taking a step back, ‘Rubes, either you’re a shit friend to Mollie, which I know isn’t true, or you’re testing me, which is a bit shit too, to be honest. So, what’s going on?’

Ruby leaned back and grinned, ‘Good. You passed. None of Evie’s or Chelsea’s boyfriends have ever passed.’

‘You kissed their boyfriends and they didn’t pull your hair out or give you a black eye?’ Jamie shook his head, ‘Girls are weird.’

Mollie walked over, frowning, ‘I told you not to do that shit any more.’

Ruby smiled, shrugging, her red curls bouncing on her shoulders, the school jumper wrapped around her waist. ‘He passed. He’s a good one. You have my blessing!’ Ruby waltzed off, grinning.

Jamie and Mollie were left leaning against the school fence, his arm around her shoulder.

‘I didn’t need your blessing, bitch!’ Mollie yelled after her, but she was laughing.

‘You know she’s kind of crazy?’

‘She’s protective,’ Mollie shrugged, leaning into him, closing her eyes as she rested her head against his neck. ‘But you’re in the good books now, so we won’t have any more problems.’

‘In life?’ Jamie grinned, stroking her arms, ‘So we’re not talking about what happens when we go to uni?’

Mollie looked up at him, her dark eyes boring into his, ‘What are you saying?’

He squeezed her, ‘I’m saying that we need a plan. If you’re in Bristol and I’m in York, we’re going to have to work hard to stay together. Even though, I could easily do my course at Bristol...’

‘And I told you I didn’t want you to make decisions based on me.’ Mollie pursed her lips, ‘You do you, and we’ll work the rest out.’

‘Why can’t I just be where you are? I can learn anywhere, but being with you makes me happy.’

‘Boys are so much younger than girls.’ Mollie rolled her eyes, ‘What if we’re still together, and you go to get a job that you’re turned down for, because you didn’t do the course you needed in York? I don’t want you to resent me, I want you to be happy, to miss me whilst we’re apart and be excited to see me.’

‘Treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen. Oh, you sly woman,’ Jamie held her to him, laughing as he kissed her, wrapping his arms around her, ‘you’re going to destroy me.’

***

Mollie couldn’t spend too much time worrying about the interview, she’d gone back to bed for a brief half an hour, before getting Esme’s lunch packed and insistently kissing her goodbye before Evie took her to school.

Mollie couldn’t whine, she had stuff to get sorted. Chelsea had arranged for a crate of free wine from a local bar to be delivered, in return for some advertising, some walk-ins had asked for information about renting the space for their daughter’s christening, and a couple of the neighbours had stopped by to congratulate Mollie on her TV debut. It had been non-stop – exciting, but exhausting. Add on the fact that the studio had an event that evening and Evie had been standing on a ladder, fiddling with a lightbulb for twenty minutes, and Mollie was not in the mood for things to start going wrong.

‘Couldn’t you just call Ty?’ Mollie sighed. Chelsea’s brother had discovered a talent for lighting, and had created a beautiful lighting set for their latest series, a collection of photographs from the Camden History Society, opening with a play that evening. Called ‘Our Town’, it was something that the local community were invested in – they were finally on their side, no longer questioning Ruby Tuesday’s rock’n’ roll influence, or dwelling on the drama of the opening. The Ruby Rooms was Camden, and everyone wanted to see what they were going to do next. Which was actually more terrifying than defending every move they made.

‘Ty doesn’t live in London, smarty pants. And I’m not calling him to change an effing light bulb. Electrician course, remember?’ Evie groaned, reaching up on her tiptoes, ‘I can do it.’

‘Did Esme seem okay this morning? We had words last night,’ Mollie leaned on the doorframe of the kitchen, watching her friend’s dark curls shake as she wobbled on the ladder.

‘She wants you to date her friend’s dad.’

‘She said the other kids are being mean because she doesn’t have a dad, do you think I need to report it to the school or something?’

Evie twitched her lips, ‘Um... not really qualified to give an opinion here, babe. I mean, in Badgeley maybe ten kids in the year had their dads on the scene. You’d be more likely to be bullied for having one.’

‘So, I should let my kid be bullied because I wasn’t quick enough to go out and get her a stepdad?’ Mollie winced, shaking her head.

‘Oh leave off, you are joking? You have raised that kid in spite of Linda, in spite of your age, your situation and being alone. You have done an amazing job. Esme is stronger than any of that bullshit. I think maybe she just wants to make sure you’re happy. She wants you to have your happy ending, it’s simple as that.’

‘Yeah,’ Mollie shrugged, ‘maybe.’

‘Definitely.’

Mollie took a deep breath, tightened her ponytail and clapped her hands, ‘So, today, what’s the timescale?’

‘You’re in the kitchen, being awesome. By the way, I made sure your flyers for the Mollie Makes... workshop were sped up, they’ll be here this afternoon, so you can put them out on the sides. Hopefully we’ll get some interest from your TV performance this morning. The photographer from the Journal will be here about five, then the drama group. Kick off around seven.’

‘I love that you’re more organised than you look.’

‘Heart surgery looks like murder halfway through. Plus, the timeline is on the whiteboard in the conservatory. Just remember to take the delivery for the flyers, they never seem to find the entrance, no matter how much I explain the massive red door.’

‘I’ll leave it open, probably better whilst I’m making hundreds of canapes anyway,’ Mollie nodded.

‘And Killian’s going to pick up Esme in the van today, then drop her off before heading off to deliver his day bed.’

Mollie nodded, suddenly so grateful for all these people and how they had become involved in her and her daughter’s life. She hadn’t done this alone at all. She had more support than a nuclear family. She couldn’t be bitter. She could just be pissed off at those dickhead eleven-year-olds.

And maybe have a glass of wine with Max. Obnoxious, older, but slightly alluring Max. But all of that could wait until the pastry cases were fully cooked.

Mollie had her cooking habits, her creative habits, the same as the others. Some weeks Chelsea didn’t say anything, she just turned up at the studio, walked into the conservatory and put on some jazzy hip hop. Mollie would sometimes watch her dance from the kitchen, how her friend seemed to suddenly take up so much more space, she stretched and breathed life back into herself. Evie blared eighties rock from the back room before launching herself at a canvas like it was a lifeline, moving desperately and angrily until she let out whatever was inside. And Mollie was different again. She went into a zen state, smooth and simple with the Beatles playing on the speaker system, a little dance as she moved from the trays in the kitchen, back to the oven.

Time passed in a way it didn’t with anything else, when Mollie was cooking. She felt like everything else stopped and all that mattered were shapes, temperatures, smells, textures... things that could be seen and felt and tasted. Things that were obvious. The Beatles sang ‘Here comes the sun’ and she heard herself singing along, believing them as they said, ‘It’s all right...’

‘Hello?’

A voice echoed from the studio front door, and Mollie yelped, turning down the music. The poster delivery guy.

‘In here, door’s open!’

She wiped off her hands, but the buzzer started going for the mini quiches, so she grabbed her polka dot oven mitts and grabbed the tray, poking her head around the door to catch the delivery guy.

It was at that moment, wearing her Wonder Woman apron, with flour smeared on her cheeks, that Mollie dropped a tray of mini quiches, and realised she was staring at Jamie MacAllister.

***

‘Look, nothing has to change for you,’ Mollie said resolutely, hand on Jamie’s arm. His face was pale and he seemed to look past her, his eyes glassy and vacant. She scanned his features for anger, sadness, indifference. He was blank, but for the shock. Perhaps just the littlest bit of wonder creeping in around the edges. But maybe she was just being hopeful.