The Secret Father

It was an odd beginning, but she went with him. “How could I forget?” She could have bitten her tongue off.

With a look of forebearance, Zach went to the counter where she’d set out a bowl. He ladled chili from the saucepan and sprinkled onions over the top.

“I knew someone in Chicago—a woman named Olivia Kendall.”

“Olivia Kendall? I’ve heard that name.”

He lifted his head so sharply chili spilled over the edge of the ladle to splatter the stove. “How? Did she write me here?”

“Huh?” Beth circled the counter to the family room and plucked a magazine from the stack beside her favorite chair. “No one wrote to you here. I always wondered why. I thought you surely had friends.” She showed him last month’s issue of Relevance. “I know her from this. How did you meet a woman like her?” All he needed was another Helene type.

“I’m not sure.” He shook his head and then lifted his spoon for a bite. Normally, chili was the next best thing to nectar for Zach. He savored it like those folks on the food channel swilled choice wine. This bite, he swallowed almost without chewing, but then cringed and ran for the sink where he splashed water into his burned mouth.

“I’m sorry, son.” She got him a beer, twisted the top and put the bottle on the counter. “Now, tell me about Olivia Kendall. What does she want from you?”

His still-wary gaze reminded her of the little boy who’d once thought she knew everything. After all these years, some of that child’s vulnerability remained in Zach’s eyes. He’d hate it if he knew.

“I knew her well. I—” He broke off, his face tight. She couldn’t tell if the chili burn hurt him or if he was struggling with the words. “Apparently, I cared for her.” He looked almost ashamed. “We have a son. Olivia and I.”

While she stared, mouth literally agape, he took the bottle top from her hand and tossed it into the garbage beneath the sink. Then he maneuvered her into the nearest chair. He might be giving her time to take it in. More likely, he was embarrassed. He’d had Lily too quickly with Helene, too.

“How does a man forget a child?”

“Or the boy’s mother,” Zach said. “She was young. I know what kind of resources her family has, but I hate to think of what she went through, being a single mother because I disappeared.” He patted his pockets as if he were looking for something. “Olivia brought a picture, but I left it at home.” He pointed to the mantel in her living room. “He looks just like those.”

She turned her head slowly. She’d all but papered her house in photos of Ned and Zach. She hadn’t wanted her boy to forget his father. “He looks like you? Or your daddy?”

“So much like me you wouldn’t be able to tell our pictures apart.” He pointed toward the end of the table, at his kindergarten graduation photo above a dried-flower arrangement. “He’s that old.”

She stared at the picture, taking time to let Zach’s news sink in. Ned, as tall as Zach was now, but already more gray about the head than blond, had hoisted their son in miniature cap and gown to his shoulder. As proud as if their Zach had finished Harvard magna cum laude. Good thing, because he’d been gone twelve years by the time Zach finished college on the government’s dime.

She shook her head. “How’d you even meet someone like her? That family hardly keeps our kind of company.”

“After she told me about Evan I didn’t think to ask for details.” His haggard expression was painful to see, but he turned away, rejecting her concern for a swig of his beer. “I left on my last mission before she could tell me she was pregnant, and then she saw my picture in the news. Her father tried to get more information out of the Navy, but Kendall was the last person they wanted to see, and they didn’t know about Olivia—any more than she knew what I was really doing. She never heard I survived until she saw a report on the bank robbery.”

“My God.”

He took his chair again, his moving body pushing the heavy oak table away. “Yeah.”

“Is she looking for support?” A mother’s protectiveness sharpened her voice. For once, Zach didn’t seem to notice.

“Olivia Kendall,” he repeated, as if her name said it all.

It did.

“Still, I owe my son support.”

True. “What else does she want?”

“A father for Evan.” He stood again, his meal forgotten as he strode the creaking wooden floor. “That’s what she says.”

After Helene, it was a hard concept to follow. “Do you believe her?”

“I think so.” He lifted a troubled gaze. “I have to because I want to see him. I don’t know if Evan needs me, but I’m shocked that I’ve had a son for five years. He’s at an age where it must be obvious he’s different from other boys and girls.”

“Nonsense. We don’t live in that world anymore. People divorce now. Unwed mothers keep their children. He won’t have…”

“You see his life through an adult’s eyes. I’m trying to look through his.” He turned. “And I need to know if you can be his grandmother—if you can love him as much as you love Lily.”

“You have to ask?” He’d lost his ability to trust, along with those memories that had disappeared in his injuries. She worshiped her granddaughter. “I value every second with Lily, just as you do, and I’ll love your boy as much. Let’s ask Olivia and—” She broke off. “You said his name is Evan?” He nodded. “Let’s invite them to your gran and grandpa’s anniversary celebration.”

Seth and Greta Calvert had loved her like a daughter. They’d made her part of their family the day Ned had brought her to these mountains, and since then they’d all claimed countless other “marry-ins.” They’d claim Olivia and Evan, too, and make them welcome.

“I just hope we don’t overwhelm him.” Beth assumed Zach agreed with her plan, without giving him time to differ. “Does his mother have family I might not have read about?”

“Only her father.” Distraction distanced Zach’s voice. “She named Evan for me, Mom. His middle name is Zachary.”

Red-rimmed eyes described the gratitude he obviously couldn’t voice. He already knew how to love this child who’d appeared out of the past he couldn’t explain or defeat.

She went to him. “He’s in Chicago?”

Zach nodded.

“When do you go?” Since the day he’d come home to heal, she hated to see Zach leave the safety of Bardill’s Ridge.

“Tomorrow morning.” He looped his arm around her shoulders. “Warn the rest of the family to treat Evan and Olivia right? Remind them not to confuse her with Helene.”

“We’re all protective of you.” She hugged him briefly. He hardly ever allowed more. “If she’s good to you, we’ll love her.”

He let her go and scooped up Spike, who inexplicably began kneading his fellow loner’s shoulder. “No,” Zach said. “You’ll love her because Evan will feel more accepted if you do.” With a last pat for Spike as he set him on a padded kitchen chair, he headed for her door. “I’ll call you from Chicago.”

“Are you bringing him home?”

“Chicago is his home. I thought he’d have an easier time if we met where he’s comfortable, but while I’m there, I’ll arrange visitation with Olivia.”

“Another visitation agreement?”

He nodded, a frown creasing his forehead. “Or something like it. Olivia seems to believe we should take decisions slowly. I have no intention of losing contact with my son, now that she’s told me about him, but I figure we’ll fight the battle of how often I get to see him when it comes.”

Hardly good news, but she stomped down hard on her opinions. Zach stopped at the door.

“Everything will be fine, Mom.”

He offered the same reassurance every time he left town. He expected no answer. He was only promising he wouldn’t die when he left Bardill’s Ridge. Obviously, she knew something could happen, but he was a good son to try to persuade her not to worry.

She added some comfort of her own to her “I know” smile. When he came back they’d all find a way to live with another custody arrangement. She waved him off, and he tried to smile back, but his hard-edged face lingered in her mind after the door slammed at his back.

She slumped against the table. Apart from the fact that he’d clearly been reckless six years ago, he didn’t deserve all this. A past that wouldn’t let him alone and a child who’d been a secret from him. When would Fate let up on her son?