The Child Left Behind

Gabrielle was sitting on her bed waiting for a visitation by her aunt, and when she saw her framed in the doorway, her face so full of sadness and disappointment, she cried, ‘Oh, Aunt Bernadette, I am so sorry.’

Bernadette crossed the room. ‘What possessed you, child?’

‘Auntie, we couldn’t help ourselves.’

‘Tell me, was it one or several men you lay with?’

Gabrielle was truly shocked. ‘One man only, Aunt, and one I love with all my heart and soul. What sort of girl do you take me for?’

‘You know, Gabrielle, a year ago that wouldn’t have been a hard question to answer,’ Bernadette said, disappointment being replaced by anger. ‘But now I don’t know what sort of girl you have turned out to be. A girl who lies down and offers herself like some repulsive harlot is not the sort of person I would wish to be related to.’

Gabrielle recoiled from the harsh words, and yet she tried to defend herself. ‘It wasn’t like that, truly it wasn’t!’ she cried desperately, yet she knew that is how everyone would view it. The love she and Finn had shared in the farmhouse would be tainted and spoiled, and she could almost feel a coldness between her and her aunt that had never been there before.

‘And who is the boy or man who took you down in such a manner? Was he from the town?’

‘No,’ Gabrielle said, and when she saw the look of repugnance sweep over Bernadette’s face, she lifted her head higher. ‘His name is Finn Sullivan and he is an Irishman in the British Army.’

‘A common soldier!’ Bernadette cried. ‘How could you lower yourself like that?’

‘He wasn’t. He isn’t!’ Gabrielle exclaimed. ‘You don’t know him. I don’t care what you say either because I love him and he loves me.’

‘And what would you know about love?’ Bernadette sneered.

‘I know how I feel.’

‘I know how you felt as well,’ Bernadette said. ‘Full of wantonness. How did you meet this common soldier you say you love?’

There was little point in concealment. It would all come out in the end, but when Gabrielle began explaining how she climbed down the tree, even she was aware how sordid it sounded.

Bernadette suddenly remembered the sound of rustling she had heard outside her room the night before she and Raoul had left for Paris, and she said, ‘You even crept out to see him the night before we brought you here, didn’t you?’

Gabrielle nodded. ‘I had to do that,’ she whispered. ‘It was to say goodbye. I don’t know when I will ever see him again.’

Bernadette’s face was full of disgust. ‘You shouldn’t have seen him in the first place, you stupid girl. You behaved little better than a common tramp, Gabrielle. To think I felt sorry for you, cooped up in that house. I see now that your father was right. He must have known that he had a slut for a daughter.’

‘I am no slut,’ Gabrielle cried. ‘We didn’t intend this to happen and it happened the once only when we forgot ourselves. Finn is a fine man and will marry me willingly, I know, and he is a Roman Catholic.’

‘Then that is the only good thing about all this,’ Bernadette said. ‘At least it is not some heathen you will be married to.’

‘And we should be grateful to him and men like him because he is fighting for France,’ Gabrielle said, lifting her chin in the air. ‘I’m proud of what he is doing.’

‘You can take that haughty look off your face before I take it off for you,’ Bernadette said sharply. ‘You have nothing to be so high and mighty about, and the idea that he and his kind are fighting for France is nonsense. They are fighting for themselves. But that is neither here nor there. He has got you in the family way and he must be made to marry you.’

‘We wanted to marry,’ Gabrielle said. ‘I said I would wait for him, but he might not be at St-Omer now.’

‘Why not?’

‘Because they were awaiting orders for moving out when I came to Paris.’

‘Well, if they are gone someone will know where. He will have to be found and made to do his duty,’ Bernadette said. ‘We must make plans to return as soon as possible. Raoul will go to find out when the next train is and we must send a telegram to your parents so that they will expect us.’

A shudder went right through Gabrielle’s body and she said to her aunt, ‘I’m afraid of facing Papa.’

‘I’m not surprised,’ Bernadette said. ‘You have done your best to shame him—shame the whole family, in fact—but you should have thought of that sooner.’ As she got up she looked at Gabrielle disparagingly. ‘I will tell my maid that there is sickness in the family and you are needed at home, and send her in to help you pack. And we won’t bother taking any of the fancy gowns I bought for you. You will hardly fit into them for much longer anyway.’

They travelled to St-Omer that same day and arrived in the evening. The Joberts had already eaten, but when Mariette offered to make them a meal, Bernadette shook her head.

‘We had something before we left and I have news that cannot wait,’ she said.