Please Don’t Take My Baby

‘But she’s missing dinner,’ Paula said, worried.

‘I’ll save her some,’ I said.

Halfway through dinner the doorbell rang. Clearly it wasn’t Jade, as she had a key, so I thought it was probably a salesperson on another ill-timed visit. But as with any unexpected caller it crossed my mind it might be the police with bad news, so I left my dinner and answered the door.

‘Oh, Meryl,’ I said, surprised. ‘Hello.’

‘I hope it’s not inconvenient,’ she said. ‘I just wanted to say hi to Jade and see how she’s doing.’

‘She’s not here at present,’ I said. ‘Although she’s fine. She’s at a friend’s house.’ I didn’t ask Meryl in, as there didn’t seem any point. Jade wasn’t here and we were in the middle of dinner.

‘But she’s doing all right?’ Meryl asked.

‘Yes. We’ve been home and collected some of her belongings, and I met her mother. Perhaps you’d like to call round another evening?’

‘Yes, please. Some of the staff and Jade’s friends at school have been asking after her. I don’t want Jade to think we’ve forgotten her. I’ll call round later in the week, if that’s OK?’

‘Yes. Sure.’ Then I had another light-bulb moment. ‘I don’t suppose you have Jade’s mobile number? It should have been included in the paperwork but it wasn’t.’

Meryl nodded. ‘Yes, I do,’ she said, taking her mobile from her coat pocket.

‘Great.’ I wrote the number she read out on the notepad I kept by the phone in the hall. ‘Thanks very much,’ I said, relieved. ‘I hope you don’t mind if I don’t ask you in tonight but we’re just having dinner.’

Meryl smiled. ‘I’m sorry. I seem to be making a habit of that. Shall I call round a little later next time?’

‘Yes, please. After six thirty is usually good for us.’

‘See you soon, then,’ she said, and we said goodbye.

As soon as I’d closed the front door I keyed Jade’s number into the phone. Disappointingly the call went straight through to her voicemail, so I left a message: ‘Hi Jade, it’s Cathy. I hope you’re having a nice time with your friend. Could you give me a ring and let me know what time you’ll be home? My number is –’ For it occurred to me that she might not know my number; she hadn’t asked for it and I hadn’t thought to tell her.

I’d purposely kept my message short and light, as I didn’t want to sound the heavy parent/carer. But an hour later when Jade still hadn’t returned my call I was really worried and phoned her mobile again. It went straight through to her voicemail and this time my message was firmer: ‘Jade, it’s Cathy again. It’s seven o’clock and I need to know where you are, and what time you’ll be home. I thought you’d be back by now. Please phone straightaway. I’m worried.’

I returned to the sitting room, where Adrian and Paula were, and hid my anxiety. But they too were becoming worried. ‘It’s very dark,’ Paula said. ‘Where is Jade?’ They both looked at me.

‘She’s a big girl,’ I reassured them. ‘She’ll be home soon.’

When it was Paula’s bedtime I helped her with her bath and then saw her into bed, but as I read her bedtime story my heart wasn’t in it. It was now 7.30 and there’d been no word from Jade; I knew I needed to take further action. Although I would feel a complete fool and an incompetent foster carer reporting Jade missing when she had only been with me two days, I knew that’s what I had to do. As soon as I’d finished reading and had kissed Paula goodnight I went downstairs and to the phone in the sitting room. Adrian was at the kitchen table finishing some homework. I dialled Homefinders’ number and it was answered almost immediately by Michael, one of the agency’s social workers, who was on duty and taking emergency calls. I quickly explained the situation.

‘It’s not your fault,’ he said. ‘Try not to worry. I’m sure Jade’s OK. It’s typical teenager behaviour. This is what you do: phone Jade’s mobile one last time and if she doesn’t answer, which I don’t think she will, leave a message saying that if she doesn’t phone you within five minutes you’ll have to report her missing to the police. Say that you’re worried and she’s behaving irresponsibly, especially as she is pregnant and hoping for a positive parenting assessment. She should get the message.’

It seemed harsh but I knew that Michael, like Jill, was a highly experienced social worker whose advice I should follow.

‘And if Jade does answer her phone I’ll tell her to come home straightaway?’ I confirmed.

‘Yes, but put a time limit on it. Teenagers work on a different time scale to adults. Tell her she has to be back in half an hour or else you will have no alternative but to call the police and start a missing person.’

‘Thanks for your help, Michael,’ I said. ‘I’m sorry to have troubled you.’

‘No worries. That’s what we’re here for. Give me a ring back either way.’

Having ended the call to Homefinders I keyed in the number to Jade’s mobile, but as before the call went straight through to her voicemail. I left the message Michael had suggested and then replaced the receiver, hoping that contacting the police wouldn’t be necessary. I had just enough time to go through to the kitchen and check if Adrian needed any help with his homework when the phone rang. I returned to the sitting room, picked up the phone, and was relieved to hear Jade’s voice.

‘Hi, got your message,’ she said casually. ‘I’ll be back soon.’

‘Jade, I’ve been really worried about you,’ I said. ‘I phoned three times. Why didn’t you return my calls?’

‘I had me phone off. I’ve only just checked it.’ Which may have been true, although it was a bit of a coincidence that she’d thought to check her phone a minute after I’d left my last message. But I gave her the benefit of the doubt.

‘OK. Where are you, love?’ I asked. ‘It’s dark now and getting late.’

I heard her sigh. ‘I’m at Ty’s,’ she said, irritated by being questioned.

‘How are you getting home?’

‘Bus. Same as always.’

I didn’t like the idea of a young girl riding a bus alone in the dark, but there wasn’t much I could do – I couldn’t collect her in the car, as Paula was asleep – and from what Jade had said she was used to using the buses alone at night. However, following Michael’s advice, I said: ‘Jade, I want you here in half an hour, love. No later. Do you understand? Otherwise I’ll have no choice but to start a missing person.’

‘Fine!’ she snapped. And cut the call.

I replaced the receiver and sat for a moment, feeling a little hurt, but aware I was going to have to become ‘thick-skinned’ and be firm with Jade. Her mother had made the mistake of being a chum to her rather than a parent and I thought Jade now resented me stepping into the role of parent and telling her what to do, even if it was for her own good and ultimately for the good of her baby too.

Forty minutes later, as I sat in the sitting room with the television on low and when Adrian was in bed, I heard the key go in the front door. Relieved, I went into the hall as Jade let herself in and closed the door behind her.

‘I’m pleased you’re back, love,’ I said. ‘Isn’t it cold out?’

Jade shrugged and was about to go straight up to her room. ‘Jade, before you go to bed can we have a little chat, please?’

‘Can’t it wait?’ she sighed, irritated. ‘I’m tired.’

‘It will only take five minutes. Have you eaten?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Let’s go and sit down and have a chat,’ I said, and I went down the hall.

With another sigh Jade reluctantly followed me into the sitting room and then sat in the chair furthest away from me. I knew I must make sure my approach was not threatening or accusatory. I smiled and in a calm, even voice I explained that I’d been worried about her, not knowing where she was, as I would have been about any young person I was looking after. I said that in future, for her own safety, I needed to know where she was going, how she was getting home and what time she would be back, which seemed reasonable to me.

‘I’m not a kid,’ Jade said huffily.

‘I know you’re not, love, but at seventeen you’re still a minor and while you’re with me I’m responsible for you. Apart from which I need to know you’re safe or I’ll worry about you. It’s what parents and carers do.’

‘Mum didn’t worry,’ she said moodily.

‘I’m sure she did,’ I said. ‘In her own way.’ Although of course boundaries are a sign of caring and Jackie had admitted she hadn’t put in place enough boundaries with Jade.

I looked at Jade, perched on the edge of the chair and eager to be away. I wasn’t convinced she was receptive to what I was saying, so I upped it a little. ‘Jade, when you didn’t come home or return my calls I phoned my fostering agency for some advice. The social worker there said that soon the social services will be starting an assessment of you, to see if you are responsible enough to keep your baby. You need to make sure you behave responsibly or it won’t look good.’