Diana Wynne Jones
Fact: A Goon is a being who melts into the foreground and sticks there…When the Goon turns up demanding "Archer’s two thousand", life turns upside-down. As Howard desperately tries to get to the bottom of this peculiar demand, he discovers that the town is run by seven crazy wizards (not all of whom live in the present!) and someone is trying to take over the world!Exciting, bizarre and truly hilarious!
For more information about the author and her work, visit her website at: dianawynnejones.com (http://dianawynnejones.com)
First published by Methuen Children’s Books Ltd 1984
Published by HarperCollins Children’s Books 2000 HarperCollins Children’s Books is a division of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 77-85 Fulham Palace Road, Hammersmith, London, W6 8JB
The HarperCollins Children’s Books website address is: www.harpercollins.co.uk (http://www.harpercollins.co.uk)
Text copyright © Diana Wynne Jones 1984
Illustrations by Paul Hess 2000
Diana Wynne Jones and Paul Hess assert the moral right to be identified as the author and illustrator of the work.
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Source ISBN: 9780006755272
Ebook Edition © SEPTEMBER 2014 ISBN: 9780008116705
Title Page (#ub79544f5-4ea8-5c70-bda5-f9114c508bdb)
Author’s Note (#ulink_c1881613-87f0-50d8-be84-220fd8673c91)
Chapter One (#ulink_a6eb0650-a32a-50c0-8c49-5a2acf823354)
Chapter Two (#ulink_b5380a74-5094-5af5-b6ce-d135d9d67d0b)
Chapter Three (#ulink_220a166c-56f2-5a42-8f6e-dd88d0e182d3)
Chapter Four (#ulink_ac828c7d-acb8-570a-a36a-5ffd10a7b852)
Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)
Keep Reading (#litres_trial_promo)
Other Books By (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
AUTHOR’S NOTE (#ulink_1b4542e1-6390-562d-b73e-5a4f97fbcfe8)
This book will prove the following ten facts:
1 A Goon is a being who melts into the foreground and sticks there.
2 Pigs have wings, making them hard to catch.
3 All power corrupts, but we need electricity.
4 When an irresistible force meets an immovable object, the result is a family fight.
5 Music does not always soothe the troubled breast.
6 An Englishman’s home is his castle.