The Gentleman Cadet

Having reached the Academy at an early hour, I ascertained that the cadets were then in study, or, as it was termed, “in academy.” I was shown to the room to which I was posted, and was shown a bed, which was to be mine. There were four beds in the room, these beds being turned up so as to occupy little or no space. There was one window, which had laced iron bars across it, like a prison window, whilst four cupboards were opposite the fireplace. I was told that in half an hour the cadets would come out of study, when I should see Holms, who was head of the room, and a corporal.

I waited with considerable anxiety for this half-hour to pass, and amused myself in the meantime in noting how scanty the furniture of the room was, which consisted of a table, on which was a red cloth, and four stools. The floor was sanded, and of course had no carpet, and no other article of furniture except a small rectangular looking-glass was visible.

I turned over in my mind how I should introduce myself to Holms when he came in, and at length decided I would say, “Mr Holms, I believe! I am Shepard, appointed to your room.”

Having waited a period that seemed quite an hour, I heard a bell ring, and saw about one hundred and fifty cadets run quickly out from the centre building and form into four divisions. These four divisions remained stationary until an officer went on parade, who, having read out something from a paper, gave some word of command, and the four divisions marched off, two in one direction, two in another.

One division passed the window where I was standing, but the other was dismissed at the door by which I had entered, and instantly there was the rush of feet as the whole party came into the building I was occupying. The door of my room opened, and a dark, good-looking cadet came in, and, seeing me, said, —

“Hullo! who are you?”

“Mr Holms, I believe?” I said in as polite a tone as I could. “I am Shepard, appointed to your room.”

The cadet I addressed looked at me very hard, and then burst out laughing.

“You are rather green, I fancy,” he said, “and you look deuced seedy. What’s the matter?”

“I have only just recovered from the hooping-cough,” I replied; “that’s why I didn’t join before.”

“Well, you must take care of yourself,” said Holms, “for you’re not well now.”

Another cadet now rushed into the room, to whose appearance I at once took a dislike. He had a conceited look about him, and a pale, drawn face, very different from that of Holms.

“Hurrah!” he said, “the neux has come at last! Here, Timpson, come and look at the last-joined neux! He doesn’t look much of a fellow, does he?”

A third cadet here joined us, who was a hard-looking youth, who frowned and looked crossly at me.

“He wants teaching manners,” said the cadet called Timpson. “What do you mean, sir, by looking at me like that? Take that!”

To my surprise and discomfiture, I received a heavy box on the ear which nearly knocked me down. I turned round, and for an instant I thought of returning the blow; but I recalled to mind that I had heard of a neux being all but killed who had struck on old cadet, and, instantly recollecting myself, I said, —

“I did nothing to deserve such a blow as that.”

“You’re cheeky, are you?” said Timpson. “Take that for your cheek!” and another blow was given me as severe as the first.

“Come, Timpson,” said Holms, “you are not going to bully my neux already. He’s seedy, and so let him alone. Brush your hair and wash your face, for you must go on parade in ten minutes.”

I was half-crying now, as I was considerably hurt by the blows Timpson had given me, and stood hesitating what to do.

“Here, brush me!” said the cadet whose name I found was Snipson.

I took up a brush and brushed Snipson, but did this by no means to his satisfaction.

“You’ve a deal to learn, sir,” he said; “why, you don’t even know how to brush one! Give me the brush!”

I gave Snipson the brush, upon which he said, “Turn round!” I turned round, thinking he was going to brush my back, and perhaps give me a hint as to using the brush. Suddenly, however, he rubbed the brush over my mouth and nose, whilst he seized me by the back of the neck, so as to hold me firmly and prevent my escape. The pain of this proceeding was so great that I called “Oh, don’t!” which brought forth a shout of laughter from Snipson. Holms, however, who was brushing his hair, here interfered and said, “Snipson, I’ll lick you if you don’t let my neux alone!”

“He’s mine as much as yours!” replied Snipson.

“I’m head of the room, and I won’t have this bullying,” replied Holms; “so look out!”

A bugle now sounded, which caused both Holms and Snipson to hurry on their belts and prepare for parade, for this bugle was “the warning” that was sounded five minutes before parade. On the second bugle sounding the cadets rushed out of the “division,” as it was termed, in which we were quartered, and fell in in two ranks, in front of the building, whilst I was told to “fall in” in rear, as I was in plain clothes.

When the names of the cadets had been called by Holms, who was corporal on duty, we were marched to the middle of the parade, where soon after three other divisions were marched, and we there waited till an officer came on parade. Whilst we were waiting I could not avoid noticing that I was an object of general attention. I was the only cadet in plain clothes, for the boys who had passed with me were already in uniform, and were also well on with their drill. That I had not joined with the others I soon learnt was a most unfortunate circumstance; amidst the crowd I should then have shared with others the unpleasant notice that a neux usually attracted, but now I was one only, and distinctly marked in consequence of not being in uniform.

After being inspected by an officer, parties of cadets were sent to various drills under soldiers who were corporals or sergeants. I had the special attention of a bombardier devoted to me, who commenced by instructing me in the mysteries of “Stand at ease!” and “Attention!” These commands the man shouted at me as though I were deaf, or were half a mile from him; and the commands were pronounced as “Stand at – hease!” – “’Shon!”

An hour of this drill convinced me that it was not such an easy thing to stand at ease as people imagined, and that a man taken from the plough had a very difficult task before him to learn his drill.

Upon being dismissed from my drill, I was going to walk about the parade a little, but I soon heard my name shouted by Snipson from the room I was appointed to. Upon entering the room Snipson said, “You’re a cool kind of a fellow, swaggering about on parade! You just come here instantly after you’re dismissed your drill, every day! Now get my basin filled with water?”

“Where is your basin?” I inquired.

“Where is my basin? Why, go and find it, and look sharp, or I will give you a licking?”

I glanced all round the room, but saw no sign of a basin, so concluded it must be outside. I opened the door, and saw opposite to me four large tin basins. Rejoicing in my luck in finding the basins, I stooped down and selected one, which I was about to take into my room, when I heard a shout close beside me, and saw Timpson in a great rage glaring at me. “You’re the coolest young ruffian I ever saw!” said Timpson. “What do you mean by taking my basin?” No sooner had he uttered these words than he lifted his leg and gave me a kick, in much the same manner as though I had been a football.

“Drop that basin?” shouted Timpson; “and if I ever catch you touching it again I’ll half kill you!”

“What! in trouble again?” said Snipson, who had now come to the door. “Serve you right! what a donkey you are! Don’t you see our basins are round here?”

I now saw that there were three basins on the left-hand side of the door of our room, which I had overlooked when I first went out. I lifted one of these, and, taking it into the room, placed it on the table – the only place that it seemed possible to wash on.

“Fat the basin in the proper place!” said Snipson. “You’re the greatest idiot I ever saw.”

I looked round, and, seeing only a stool, was about to put the basin there, but was warned I was wrong by the whiz of a clothes-brush close beside my head.

“You don’t mean to tell me you can’t see where the basin is to go?” said Snipson. “Don’t try to make yourself out a fool, for that won’t do.”

I now saw under the window a hanging-shelf, which I raised and propped up with two iron legs. On this I placed the basin, and then went outside for a can of water I had seen beside our door.

“That’s not my basin!” said Snipson, on my entering. “You don’t think I’m such a dirty brute as to wash in another man’s basin? That’s Holms’ – bring mine!”

“How am I to know your basin?” I inquired.

“Why, find out, to be sure!”

I was at a loss to find out, but, thinking it better to bring both in, I did so, and placed them on the shelf.

“That’s mine!” said Snipson, pointing to one of the basins; “now mind you never make a mistake again!”

I looked carefully at the basin, but could see no difference between this and either of the others, and I concluded that Snipson was joking, as they all appeared similar.

Holms now came in, and, thinking I would at once make myself useful, I placed a basin for him near Snipson’s.

“That’s not my basin?” said Holms. “Give me the other!”

I was now certain there must be some distinguishing mark, but I could see none, and was much puzzled how I should again distinguish one from the other. A bugle again sounded, and I ascertained this was the warning-bugle for dinner-parade. Our division fell in in front of the building as before, the names of the cadets were called, and we were then marched into the inner square, where an officer came, and, having heard the cadets were all present, gave the word, “Right face! quick march!”