Boyfriend Shopping: Shopping for My Boyfriend / My Only Wish / All I Want for Christmas Is You

“Yes.”

“Well, I’m having his and hers T-shirts made with a photo of us.” Viviana smiled proudly.

“That’s so sweet.” I felt my heart swell with envy. “I hope he likes it.”

“Sure he will. Red likes everything I do for him.” Viviana laughed. I heard a car horn blow, followed by the voice of Maya calling for Viviana.

“Viviana, Misalo and Red are here. Are you ready?” Maya called out from the top of the staircase.

“Yeah. I’ll be right there,” Viviana said.

“Have a good time.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to come along?” Viviana asked sympathetically.

“I’m positive,” I assured her and clicked the link for another video. I watched several more of Allison’s videos. One was about how to make up with your best friend after an argument and another showed her stopping random guys and asking them why they think girls are more attracted to drama than guys. One boy said that he believed it was because girls felt that if they didn’t have drama in their lives, they would die. That’s a real dumb answer, I thought. Another guy said that girls like drama because they’re complicated.

“Anna, can I ask you a question?” Paul, who was in eighth grade, sat down on the sofa near me.

“Yeah, what’s up?” I asked. He turned the bill of his baseball cap in the opposite direction so that it was at the back of his head. His eyebrows, which were thick like my own, were knitted in frustration.

“I want to buy something for this girl at school that I like, but I don’t know what to get her,” he said.

“Wait, you have a girlfriend?” I asked, utterly shocked that he pulled himself out of skateboarding and video games long enough to notice a girl.

“Something like that. I really like this girl and I want to do something nice, but I don’t know what girls are into,” he said sincerely.

“Well, what does she like?” I asked.

“I don’t know.” He slouched back against the sofa and placed his feet on the nearby coffee table.

“Have you asked her?”

“No. Then it would seem like I wasn’t paying attention to her,” he said.

“Well, were you paying attention?” I asked.

“No, but I don’t want her to know that. Come on, Anna, help me out here. If you had a boyfriend, what would you want him to get you for Christmas?” Paul wanted me to give him a quick answer to a complex question.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked.

“What’s what supposed to mean?” He looked confused by my question.

“You said if I had a boyfriend. Do you think that I’m not cute? Do you think that guys aren’t interested in me? Are you making fun of me because Maya and Viviana both have boyfriends?”

“Wait. I thought we were talking about my issue and not yours,” Paul said cautiously. He then shrugged his shoulders and turned the palms of his hands toward me.

“Get her whatever you think she’ll like, Paul,” I said. I was done talking and listening to him. I wasn’t mad at him; I was just trying to navigate the thoughts and feelings that came with not having a boyfriend to share the holidays and spend time with.

“Geez.” Paul stood up and headed back upstairs. “Why are girls so complicated?”

* * *

A week had gone by since I had last spoken with Jeremy for any length of time. When I saw him at school, I wanted to have a face-to-face conversation with him about Bernita and what I had heard about her. But she seemed to have Jeremy radar because the few times I got to see him passing in the hallway, she’d magically materialize like a witch appearing from behind a cloud of green smoke. She’d come over and try to act friendly with both of us, but I could see right through her phony ways. Jeremy was totally oblivious to the tension between Bernita and me. He actually suggested that we all hang out sometime. When he said that, I thought, Are you freaking kidding me? Please tell me you’re not that blind. Bernita and I are two totally different types of girl. Heck, we’re not even in the same universe. When he made his suggestion, Bernita and I both offered up phony smiles and blatant lies. I would have preferred to spend time cleaning out dog cages at the local animal shelter before I spent time around Bernita. Although we never officially declared war against each other, Bernita and I sensed that we were competing for the affections of Jeremy. After I realized that I couldn’t chat with him at school without Bernita appearing, I decided to give him a call one evening.

“Hey. What’s up?” I said when he picked up the phone.

“Drama.” His answer caught me off guard.

“Drama?” I sighed. “Who is bringing you drama?”

“Bernita,” he answered.

“I told you that chick was no good.” I jumped all over the opportunity to bad-mouth her. I told him that Bernita would never be the type of friend that I am to him. I told him that she was sneaky and malicious.

“Whatever.” He brushed off my comment like it was an uninvited fly at a picnic.

“What did she do?” I tried a different approach to get him to open up to me.

“First of all, she sends me text messages constantly.”

“So she’s a text-message stalker?” I laughed loudly.

“She sends me, like, fifty text messages a day. She knows my every move. I don’t know how but she does.”

“That’s your boo thang,” I teased him and was secretly happy that she had gotten on his nerves.

“She’s about to be fired,” he said.

“About to be? When did you hire her and why can’t you just do it now?” I pushed him to make a decision at that moment.

“I told her that I didn’t like her acting like a stalker and that I’m trying to give her another chance,” he said.

“Another chance? Did I miss something? Are you guys officially dating?” I closed my eyes and waited for his answer to punch me in the gut like a cold fist.

“I don’t know what we are. Right now she seems too needy to me,” he said.

I exhaled. There is still hope, I thought. “Well. Again. That’s the chick you decided to hang around,” I said, hoping my comment carried enough power to break the spell that Bernita cast so that he could see her the way I did. My comment didn’t work because he avoided acknowledging it and changed the subject.

“So what are you doing this weekend?” he asked.

“Just chilling out. What about you?” I asked, feeling a bit disappointed.

“About the same. Do you want to hang out this weekend? Maybe we could go bowling,” he suggested.

I smiled so hard my cheeks ached but I still gave him crap because I knew he had a good sense of humor. “I don’t know. Will your stalker girlfriend let you?”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” he said.