Holding The Line: A romantic suspense that will get your pulse racing

Beth wiped a streak of frosting off her little girl’s face. “I always do.”

The doorbell rang.

Beth looked up. She wasn’t expecting anyone. “Alejandra, finish your cake and then go brush your teeth. It’s late and you have school tomorrow.” In her mind, Beth started listing all the chores she needed to get done before sunrise. She already knew 6am would come too soon.

Beth opened the front door.

Her breath caught in her throat when she saw him.

“Stop opening your door without asking who it is,” Torres scowled. He was wearing the same clothes but his hair wasn’t tied back any more, it fell loose around his shoulders. She fought the urge to touch it. She never knew him to have more than a shadow of hair.

“Lucky for you I didn’t ask because I’m not sure I would have answered.” She hadn’t yet adjusted to the changes in his appearance. She wondered how long it would throw her to see him with hair. She had once thought that his menacing appearance was due in large part to his shaved head but his thick dark hair did nothing to soften him.

“Who is it?” Paige called.

Beth froze. “You shouldn’t be here,” she whispered. “It’s not safe.”

“I’m dead, remember? Nobody is looking for me.” Torres still stood in her doorway. He was too big for her small house, his presence too much. He had only been to her house once, four years ago, before they had become lovers. It felt different know, he was a stranger, a stranger that knew her intimately.

“Beth?” Paige called again.

“Just a minute.” She turned again to Torres. “My sister is here. She lives here now. Not in my house but in Texas.” So much had happened since he left, details he knew nothing about, some small and some life changing. She felt protective over both; they were her details from a life she had created without him.

“Tell her I’m a friend.”

His words hit her hard, internally knocking her off balance. Beth took a breath to steady herself. “We’re not though are we?”

A look of pain flashed across his dark features. Beth couldn’t be sure if she had really seen it because it was gone in an instant.

“Tell her we work together then.”

Bitterness pierced her heart. “I’d rather not have to tell her anything. You were supposed to meet her the night you left. Remember that? I wouldn’t have to tell her anything if you had met her that night.” Pain surged in her, as new and fresh as the night he left, so much anger and regret and sadness. And under it all was a layer of shame and remorse that gnawed at her.

“Beth,” he said softly. He reached out and touched her bare arm. His palm was rough and callused. They always were, that part of him hadn’t changed.

Beth pulled away. ‘Don’t. You don’t get to touch me any more.”

This time there was no doubting the pain, it was written clearly across his face. Her heart clenched at the realization she had hurt him but then she remembered all the hurt he had caused her. And she realized it would hurt him even more if she gave him false hope. She needed him to understand, even if it meant hurting him. He needed to know why she couldn’t pretend that things would ever be the same.

“Hey.” Paige came in, still holding a piece of cake. She stopped suddenly when she saw Torres. Her brows knitted together in concern. She looked to Beth for an introduction or an explanation, anything to explain the menacing stranger standing in her doorway.

Beth cleared her throat. God she hated lying to her sister, but she had to. “Paige, this is Armando. He is working with me on the case I told you about.” The use of his first name sounded strange to her. She had never called him Armando. He didn’t even look like an Armando to her.

Paige sat her plate on the hall table and then extended her hand for Torres to shake.

A strange sensation washed over Beth as she saw her sister meet Torres, like two worlds colliding. She had wanted so badly for Torres to be able to meet her family, the night he disappeared Torres was meant to meet them for dinner. Then there was nothing more that she wanted than for Torres to become fully part of her life and meet her family, but now it felt like an icepick being stabbed between her shoulder blades.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Paige. Your sister has told me so much about you.”

Beth watched as Torres’ gaze scrutinized her sister. He was taking in each of her features. For a long moment no one spoke, then Torres shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he said. “You look so much like your sister. I wasn’t expecting that.”

Paige smiled. “Yep, those Thomson genes are strong. Have you worked with Beth long?”

Beth coughed. “Um, no,” Beth answered for him. “He just started.”

“Cool. I don’t usually get to meet the people Bethy works with. It’s really nice to meet you, Armando. Hopefully I’ll get to see you again so I can ask you all the gory questions Beth refuses to answer.”

Alejandra came running through from the kitchen. “Mama, I can’t find my toothpaste. There is just your stingy kind.”

The little girl stopped short when she saw Torres. “Hi,” she said. Alejandra stood back, no doubt weary of the scary-looking stranger in her home.

“Hello.” Torres’ eyes narrowed as he looked at Alejandra. Beth could see his mind racing, putting together pieces of the puzzle. A look of realization spread over his face dark face. “Alejandra?” he asked in disbelief. His shock was palpable. His head snapped to Beth, searching for answers.

Beth nodded. He recognized her. She had been little over a year old the last time he saw her but he recognized her. Her heart constricted painfully at the realization. It was another connection she couldn’t deny.

Beth turned her attention to Alejandra. “I bought you new toothpaste yesterday. It is still on the counter in the kitchen.”

“OK. Thanks, Mama. I am going to brush my teeth and then Paige is going to read me a book. Right, Auntie Page?”

“No,” Paige said as she scooped her up. “I am going to read you four books.”

Alejandra’s giggles filled the hallway as Paige carried her off to brush her teeth.

“You still have Alejandra,” Torres said. Shock was clear in his deep voice, the sound resonated in her. Alejandra was a tangible connection to the past they had shared. Torres had been with her the day the little girl’s family had been murdered. He was the one that brought them to safety.

Beth nodded. “Yes, I adopted her. My life went on. Lots of things happened after you left.” She stressed the last part. Torres needed to know things had changed, decisions had been made; things had been done that she could never take back.

Torres shook his head. “I didn’t leave you, Beth. I didn’t choose to be gone.”

Beth shifted from one foot to the other. “Why are you here, Torres?”

“I need to speak to you, Beth.” He took a deep breath. “I just need to see you.”

Beth looked down the hall to make sure Ally and her sister were out of earshot “Why? There is nothing to say” Beth shook her head. She had lots of questions but she couldn’t handle the answers, not yet, maybe someday. Her throat was burning. Tears threatened in her eyes, ready to fall as soon as her body gave permission, but Beth wouldn’t. She had cried enough over Torres. “No,” she amended, “actually there is a whole hell of a lot to say but nothing I want to hear.”

Torres reached for her hand and this time she didn’t pull away. “You need to understand what happened. I didn’t leave you, Beth.”

She held up her hand. She didn’t care that he left because of an email. The end result was the same, he left and her life went on without him. She wouldn’t waste time being angry or wishing things were different or feeling guilty about the choices she had made. She had made some shit choices, but they had gotten her through. “It will all be in a report. I will read it then. Look Torres, I’m glad you’re OK,” She took a deep breath to fortify herself and give her the strength to continue. He needed to know there was nothing left of them. “But I’m not glad you’re back. Please leave. I can’t deal with this now.” The words stung her but they needed said. If he stayed any longer, she might not have the strength to make him go and he had to, too much had changed. They weren’t the same people. Once upon a time she would have let herself pretend that things could work. It was how she got by, pretending, but that was a luxury she didn’t have any more.

Beth tried to shut the door but Torres didn’t move, his solid form would not budge. There was a sadness to him she could not bear. It hurt to look at him. Her pain was reflected and magnified in him, and she couldn’t fix it. “I’ll go once I explain,” he said.

She closed her eyes and refused to let herself cry. “No, Torres. I’ll read it in Jessop’s report.”

“No, Beth. I’m not a detail. You told me once you like to think of the shit in life as details that you choose to ignore. That’s what you want to do, read the report and pretend it is someone else’s life. My life is not a fucking detail you can ignore,” he rasped. His grip bit into her wrist. She would have winced but she would not let him know it hurt.

Anger ignited in her, burning with an intensity that threatened to consume her. Her eyes narrowed into angry slits. “You became a detail the moment you crossed the border into Mexico. You had a choice, Torres. You could have called me.” Every choice she made had been determined by that decision. She was as angry about that as she was about him leaving. Things would have been so different if he had just stayed.

But he hadn’t.