Confessions of a School Nurse

Confessions of a School Nurse
Michael Alexander

From the people who brought you the bestselling Confessions of a GP.After sixteen years of high-pressure nursing, Michael Alexander has traded in his hospital uniform for the fresh air, comfort and routine of an International private school in the French Alps. Bliss! But it’s not long before he discovers that school nursing is not all permission slips, sniffles and gift baskets. Disastrous school trips; after hours dorm sleepovers; awkward sex education classes; culture clashes; swine flu panic; and kids with six-figure bank balances and a taste for bribery. This is nursing as you’ve never seen it before.What goes on behind the gates of one of the world’s most elite boarding schools? What happens when kids from all over the world – Russia, Africa, America, Saudi Arabia – live, learn and grow under one roof? What happens when it’s left to school staff to teach children the facts of life, and lust?Following on from the hugely successful Confessions of a Male Nurse, Michael Alexander is back with more touching, shocking and often laugh-out-loud funny tales of nursing. In Confessions of a School Nurse, Alexander tells all on boarding school life – as a nurse, parent, and Average Joe, he offers a unique perspective on this strange world.

MICHAEL ALEXANDER

Confessions of a School Nurse

The Friday Project

An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd

1 London Bridge Street

London SE1 9GF

www.harpercollins.co.uk

This ebook first published in Great Britain by HarperCollins Publishers Ltd 2015

Copyright © Michael Alexander 2015

Cover design © HarperColl‌insPublishers Ltd 2015

Michael Alexander asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

FIRST EDITION

A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.

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Source ISBN: 9780007586424

Ebook Edition © April 2015 ISBN: 9780007586417

Version: 2015-04-30

To Mum and Dad

Contents

Cover (#u8065298d-09a0-5f45-89e6-536b01680f48)

Title Page (#uc8ad71db-7769-545f-962b-89fdce7585dc)

Copyright (#uc3f6702e-3f2e-54c8-bd55-333d1b871658)

Dedication (#ua397f1fa-0c56-55be-8693-27bffb6533e1)

Disclaimer (#u6d83274f-c4d3-5da3-89fe-502a9f2776f4)

PROLOGUE (#uddda6d35-7952-5faa-887c-53c92f407d7e)

A Taste (#ue2c16bba-3c4a-5a26-b753-9e277ccd68a0)

The first day (#u9682e00d-972e-5245-91a0-3de161584c1b)

Marcus’s jewels (#u848acd28-7583-532b-93c0-6b437ea244a1)

Chapter One: The Transition (#u0fa0aa87-d5a4-5e2c-933f-2eadb1c5fe73)

Luke (#uba4ea399-6a63-5671-9113-05d62d7b37ec)

Learning the basics (#ub080733c-71a7-581c-8b1d-4e9e0a939936)

Agent trouble (#uea18f39f-54c4-5414-82cf-2f53caffdee6)

Taking the lead (#u3776a569-f5ce-5434-b3da-2852ef27b78e)

Basketball (#u1f8abb45-307b-5c7d-85d3-a22386adb349)

Checklist (#u6309eacb-fc6a-5cb5-85b1-11e356577079)

Chapter Two: Sex and Education (#u458739a9-256c-5cd3-9aea-c37b28034f16)

The talk (#uf5877ffd-441e-58fc-bc02-f99e93af9c9e)

Girl talk (#u227a2693-6035-58dd-9985-28f81b9a2c8b)

Teaching the teachers (#u4a6de331-eb4a-570c-9f4d-8c46a0922a47)

Kurt and Rachel (#uca38aa23-4634-579b-90af-9287e9250f3b)

Night-time wanderings (#ud948f52f-ca54-5f41-8455-feabd1d8503a)

The sex side of things (#ua73e4656-aee4-5f63-94e4-cbd94bdf75fd)

The crush (#ub1ff1875-76fe-53fd-98cb-ffc429b00d53)

Using your assets (#litres_trial_promo)

Long weekends (#litres_trial_promo)

Veronika (#litres_trial_promo)

Consent (#litres_trial_promo)

Dilemma (#litres_trial_promo)