A play for 2 people. An invented life. Comedy

Semchik (with interest). How did you guess?

Olchik (calmly). And what could be more global? Don't talk about anything, everything, in the end, comes down to you, yes to us. Well … (Affectionately, with a sense of self-esteem). Mostly, of course, to us.

Semchik (agreeing). Here! That's what it's about! How nice mutual understanding is. But only sometimes. Still, if you are constantly on the same wavelength and know each step of each other in advance, then it will not be interesting. Such a relationship is devoid of intrigue, fuse! And if they are not, then the couple gets bored with each other very quickly. Mutual interest will fade and that's it. No, not that everything. If mutual respect remains, then there will be friendship, which is also valuable, but to marry a man …

Olchik (interrupts). Or a husband!

Semchik (agreeing). Yes, or a husband, a man just for the sake of getting a friend… Pshhh…

Olchik (after thinking it over). In fact, friendship is also a very cloudy instance. Today you are friends, and tomorrow you blurted out something wrong, unsuccessfully joked about being overweight …

Semchik (interrupts). Or growth!

Olchik (agreeing). Or height, but you never know. And that's all – friendship apart!

Semchik (after thinking about it). Maybe, of course, not immediately apart, but it will certainly crack.

Olchik (agreeing). Definitely. What else!

Semchik (after thinking about it). Thus, we come to the conclusion that any friendship, as well as relationships, can be unstable. No one can guarantee that marriage, or friendship, neighborhood, no matter what, will not collapse at any moment literally because of some trifle. And if so, then you need to have time to appreciate the relationships that you have, until the moment when life has not broken them in a way that suits you. So?

Olchik (agreeing). So! Especially since She is life, in any case, they will be torn apart. Nothing lasts forever under the moon. Disintegration, in whatever form, is just a matter of time. Everything has its beginning and its end.

Semchik (after thinking about it). So, it turns out that in this particular case, everything in life is properly arranged. There are a lot of men, there are a lot of women and there are a bunch of all sorts of different options for how someone can interact with whom, just choose.

Olchik (after thinking it over). It turns out everything is correct here. The most objective option is realized by life, and no matter how this option does not spoil our nerves from time to time, it is the only true one.

Semchik (busily). All right! But in any case, there is something where Her Majesty's Life has made a mistake. She's fucked up! She's screwed up! Totally screwed up!

Olchik (interrupts). You can stop practicing in the selection of synonyms, I understand you. Let's look for loopholes and think about what could be done better!

Semchik (busily). There is a suggestion!

Olchik (sarcastically). Well?

Semchik (busily). Acquaintance! What a problem. Not for everyone, of course, but for most people it is a concrete stupor. Few people know how to quickly and productively establish a dialogue with the girl they like.

Olchik (interested, with a twinkle). Or a boyfriend!

Semchik (cheerfully). Exactly! Therefore, I propose to fantasize about dating. Let's come up with something with you…, something else. Such an acquaintance, where there will be no stupid silence, mooing, lost time and opportunities, which subsequently results in regret for what was not said and done!

Olchik (interested, with a twinkle). Great. Where are we going to bring these poor devils together? In a restaurant, a movie? In transport, maybe or on the Internet?

Semchik (cheerfully). Why all these difficulties? We'll make everything easier. On the street. They met, caught their eyes …, but then....

An intriguing musical theme begins to sound softly.

Olchik (interested, with a twinkle). And then we'll come up with something now! So! Acquaintance!

The musical theme is enhanced by sound.

ZTM.

Scene 4. Introduction.

The intriguing musical theme continues to sound.

Semchik and Olchik, dressed in haste, come out from different sides. They are busy with their own affairs, their thoughts. Semchik is talking on the phone, Olchik is sorting through some documents on the go, looking for the right sheet. They are walking towards each other, approaching. They are still busy with their own affairs, but they notice each other out of the corner of their eyes, everyone carefully notes mutual interest for themselves, they go by inertia, intersect, continue their course and seem to be already diverging.

Semchik dawns on the first. He is being abandoned.

The music stops, but it still sounds. Quietly. Background.

Semchik (into the phone). I'll call you back.

Turns around, looks at the girl. Olya also turns around at this moment, looks at Semchik with interest. Something is clearly starting to rustle in her head in a very right direction. She puts away the documents, looks at Semchik with growing interest.

Carefully, as if by chance, so as not to scare them off, they approach each other.

The music ends.

Semchik (winking at the girl, assessing her, playing with facial expressions). Hi.

Olchik (interested, with a twinkle). Hello, if you're not joking.

Semchik (feeling a successful rapprochement, gaining confidence). How are you?

Olchik (playfully, with a twinkle). I haven't given birth yet, but you might be able to…

Semchik (surprised). It will work – it will work! I will definitely succeed!

Olchik (playfully, with a twinkle and sarcasm). Interesting. How can you be so sure? Have experience in creating children? How much did you get, if it's not a secret?

Semchik (a little confused). Mmmm… frankly speaking, I have no experience in this matter. In the sense there is, but in the sense there is not.

Olchik (playfully, with a twinkle and sarcasm). In the sense of no, but in the sense of yes?

Semchik (a little confused). Well, yes!

Olchik (playfully, with a twinkle and sarcasm). How's that?

Semchik (a little confused). There is experience, there are no children.

Olchik (deliberately disappointed). Whoooo… Everything is clear. So Monsieur is an empty flower?

Olchik begins to turn around and leave, but only for show. She is in no hurry to leave.

Semchik (a little nervously). What is a pustotsvet at once? Come on, stop!