Kill City Blues

“I just thought that you and the gentleman might be doing some business and I didn’t want to get in the way.”

“Yes, you did,” says Samael. “That’s exactly what you wanted. To stop a business deal.”

“I see. Because he’s in a suit and I’m not, we can’t just be a couple of friends eating donuts,” I say.

Samael looks at me.

“Are we friends, Jimmy?”

“Pipe down, Hugo Boss.”

I look back at Declan.

“You just hurt my feelings.”

“He’s very sensitive,” says Candy. “He might cry.”

“I might cry.”

Declan steps closer to the table. A salesman trying to establish intimacy with the mark.

“Would a million dollars soothe your wounded soul?”

Samael tsks.

“Do you really think a man like this can be bought with money?”

“Hell,” I say. “For a million dollars you can call me Suzy Quatro.”

“You’re breaking my heart, Jimmy.”

“Eat a jelly roll.” Then to Declan, “So what do I have to do for all the tea in China?”

He opens his hands like a preacher invoking the Holy Spirit or asking for a handout.

“Give me something more precious than gold—”

“I think he means me,” says Candy.

“—but that you have no use for.”

Candy does a mock frown.

“Now he’s hurt my feelings.”

“Does this thing have a name?” I ask.

Declan speaks quietly. Suddenly serious.

“Come now, Mr. Stark. We both know what I’m talking about.”

“No. We don’t.”

Samael sighs.

“He means the Qomrama Om Ya.”

“Is that right?”

Declan’s lips curl in a sly smile.

“He’s a smart man.”

“Yeah, he is. Ask nice and he’ll guess your weight. What makes you think I have it?”

“Because you were seen using it. On the child ghost.”

Oh, right.

The Qomrama is a weapon designed by old gods, the Angra Om Ya, to kill other gods. Namely ours. Turns out that the universe really belongs to the Angra and our God foxed them out of it. Now they’re pissed and they want it back. The child ghost, Lamia, was a piece of one of the Angra that leaked through to this universe, and in a pretty blue dress and with a great big knife, she came close to destroying the world.

“You got me there. I guess I did have it.”

“Did?” says Declan.

Candy nods.

“As in past tense. As in it went bye-bye, Charlie.”

Declan cocks his head. A coy move I’d call him on if I wasn’t sure it would cost me money.

“Come now. Who could take it from you, Mr. Stark?”

“A crazy rogue angel named Aelita.”

Declan doesn’t say anything for a minute, like he’s thinking things over.

“If it’s a question of payment, I can offer you more than money. A man like you must have a use for power objects. I can offer you the Spear of Destiny. The actual spear that pierced Christ’s side on the Cross.”

Samael rolls his eyes. He’s heard the line before. Candy smiles. She thinks she’s getting a new toy.

“No thanks. I already have one of those. Right between my Nunchucks of Fate and my Zip Gun of Doom.”

“I’m disappointed to hear that,” says Declan.

“How do you think I feel? I just lost a million dollars.”

“Not if you find it. If, for instance, you manage to reacquire it, I wouldn’t ask how.”