The Long Road Ahead

birthday on Saturday the 26

of the month – and he said it would be her very best present if the three of us went to the farm to be there on the day. It would be a complete surprise if we all just turned up, say late afternoon after milking, and then he was going to book the Wheatsheaf for supper for us all. Mind you, knowing Mabel, I don’t think she’d appreciate that bit very much, because I’m sure she’d rather be the one providing the food – but that wasn’t for me to say, was it. Anyway I really think we should be there if we can – don’t you? I feel a bit bad, sometimes, that we haven’t made the effort to see the Foulkeses, but for one reason or another it just hasn’t happened, has it. And anyway, how did we know they’d really want us to? The war’s over, a thing of the past. Their life is back to where it was before we three turned up.

Anyway, Rog left me in no doubt that he would love us to come to his mother’s birthday treat, so I hope you agree with me and Evie that we should be there. Oh, and by the way…I can take us there in my car! I didn’t tell you at Christmas (I was keeping it as a surprise) that Miss Downs has been giving me driving lessons in her car for some time, and I’ve just passed my test. First time! I was pretty relieved, I must say, because my landlady was quite a fierce instructor! And then the mechanic who looks after her car found this second-hand Austin for me – which is a bit of a banger, obviously, but he says it’ll do me fine until I can afford something better. So we wouldn’t need to look for any other form of transport to get us to Home Farm on the 26

. Do ring and say you can come, Alice.

Lots of love to you, me ol’ dear – Fay

Chapter Three (#ulink_c946a2c4-6c84-5221-982a-3c55b83ca6da)

On Saturday afternoon, as she stood on the platform waiting for Sam’s train to pull in, Alice could feel her heart gathering pace. Because this felt like a first date! And in some ways it was, because this was the first time she and Sam were going to be together, alone, somewhere other than in Clifton. And she knew it was ridiculous, but she was actually feeling a bit shy. How could you possibly be shy with someone you’d known, and who’d known you, for almost all your lives?

But they were two different people now, weren’t they? They were two people who had finally declared their love for each other, and soon, very soon, he would place a ring on her finger to seal the fact which would tell the whole world that they had committed themselves to the promise of sharing their lives for ever.

Even as these thoughts filtered in and out of Alice’s mind, she still couldn’t really take it in. She still couldn’t believe that her dream, her dearest wish, had actually come true. She was going to be Sam’s wife.

She had already started practising her new signature…should it be just A. Carmichael, sort of dashed off carelessly, perhaps with a flourish somewhere? Or just A. Carmichael, neat and tidy, with no squiggles at all? She had always signed herself just Alice Watts, and she didn’t have a second name to add a bit of interest to her signature. Still, she was as proud to be a Watts as she was going to be as a Carmichael – and she knew that her mother would be happy for her. Ada would be so, so happy that her daughter was to have as good a life with the man she loved, as she herself had had with her merchant seaman husband Stanley Watts.

Alice automatically reached to touch her necklace which held the tiny, gold anchor, the present her mother had given her at Christmas so long ago, and which Alice had never removed from her neck. Recalling her mother’s words that she should remember her father and how brave he had been at sea, and that she, Alice, must always stay grounded – as an anchor must do – keep on an even keel, and never give up on her hopes and dreams.

Alice glanced around at the other people also waiting there on the platform for the train to arrive. Like her, they were all well wrapped up against the cold wind, though thankfully it had actually stopped raining for a few days. She was wearing her best cherry-red wool coat – the only other one she possessed was a green check plaid, which had seen better days – together with the fluffy white scarf around her neck which Gloria had given her several Christmases ago.

During the week, Alice had done as she’d been told and had contacted Eve and Fay about the dates on their respective letters, confirming that she would come to Bristol on the 13

for afternoon tea at the Royal Hotel, and that so far as Mabel’s birthday was concerned, Alice was to catch the midday train to Bristol, where Fay would be waiting to pick her up before driving the three of them to Home Farm. Eve would have caught the bus in from Bath earlier. And while they’d been talking about it, Fay had suggested that, as it was sure to be late after Mabel’s party, Alice should spend the night with her at Miss Downs’s house before going back to Dorchester the next day.

Alice smiled as she thought about the immediate future. Why was it that happy, exciting, special times crop up all at once, and then, usually after that, nothing much happens at all?

Number one on her present list, of course, was her engagement – absolutely no question that that was number one – but soon she and Fay and Evie were off to the farm! To see Mabel and Walter and Roger…go over old territory and see the animals, and the chickens and the dogs and the geese (though she hoped the farmer wouldn’t ask them to dig some potatoes while they were there). It was going to be lovely to see the Foulkes family again.

Finally, a sound like thunder, and a huge cloud of steam, announced the arrival of the train, and everyone stood back slightly, waiting for it to come to a hissing stop. Then, almost at once, the doors opened and all the passengers began getting off…and where was he? Where was Sam?

Alice peered around, waiting for him to materialize, and suddenly – there he was. Walking towards her with that easy, measured stride she knew so well. And Alice’s heart missed a beat. This man was hers – or soon going to be. Now he was close, looking down at her, and for a few seconds neither of them spoke. Then, in an instant, his arms were around her, pulling her into him, enveloping her, his face warm against her cold cheeks.

And for the second time, Alice felt that she was on a first date with a new lover.

What was it going to be like for them now, today? Was it going to be a comfortable, confident relationship, or a more wary one of not quite knowing what was in the other’s mind, of what was expected, or of exactly how to act? Although their feelings for each other were not a new thing, their newly established love certainly was! And in many ways there was still a lot to learn about each other. The pattern of their lives which lay ahead couldn’t possibly resemble anything that had gone before…this was going to be new territory. And that’s why she was feeling so excited – but also rather frightened. Their past was there, indelible, their future yet to come, unknowing, unknown, waiting to unfold… Was it going to turn out like a fairy tale where everything just fits neatly in place, or…

Sam had tucked her arm into his, and now they walked together towards the exit. And what do you say to a new lover, Alice wondered? Did you ask if the journey had been good, or if the heating had worked? This was so silly, she told herself…this is Sam! Just be yourself! Just say what you would have said if you’d been together last year, or the one before that! But the thing was, last year he’d been a friend, just a friend who didn’t realize how much Alice loved him, and she’d had no idea, no inkling, that he loved her. Not in that special way. The few hours they’d had together at the weekend had not been long enough to completely convince Alice that her wish had actually come true. For perhaps the first time in her life, Alice was unsure of how, or what to say.

She looked up at him, and realized that he must have been gazing at her all the time.

‘I love you,’ he said simply.

Of course! Why hadn’t she thought of that herself!

She leaned her head right into his shoulder. ‘Not as much as I love you,’ she murmured.

‘So this is where you’ve been hiding.’ Sam took off his coat and scarf and glanced around him.

‘Yes, for the last eighteen months,’ Alice said, taking his things and hanging them up with hers in the hall. ‘And I’ve been very lucky to have been given the use of this house. It belongs to the firm, of course, and is the perfect size for me – big enough, but still cosy. I’ve been able to have friends to stay because there are two spare bedrooms.’

In the bigger of the spare rooms she had made up the two single beds, making sure that both were well-aired, the covers freshly laundered and carefully ironed – well, she always made a point of doing that as a matter of course in case someone turned up unexpectedly and wanted to stay. But she’d made sure that the room Sam would be using was especially lovely – they’d not mentioned anything about him staying the night, but she’d noticed that he had an overnight bag with him, so he probably was, she’d thought.

He followed her into the sitting room, and went over to the fire which was crackling brightly over the coals. And now she came over, and he put his arms around her again. ‘I’ve got my own ideas about your engagement ring,’ he murmured, his lips close to her ear, ‘but I won’t say what they are until you tell me what you would like. It must be your choice.’

She looked up at him and smiled, and he lowered his head to close his mouth over hers. And Alice thought – if the world came to an end at this very moment, she would die happy. She would be happy for this to be the last thing which happened to her. Nothing else could ever come close.

Presently, after they’d had the coffee she’d prepared for them, they put on their coats and left the house. A weak sun filtered through the clouds as they strolled along the streets, glancing in at all the shops – especially the jewellers’ shops. And suddenly Sam said, ‘Let’s go in here. They seem to have a good display.’

Inside, the male assistant – who turned out to be the owner – was more than happy to bring every one of his rings out from the locked cabinets for them to examine. None was priced, Alice noticed, but they all looked extremely expensive to her as they gleamed and glittered against the black velvet on the display panels. Then, encouraged by the man, she began trying them on, one by one.

After a few minutes, Sam looked down at Alice. ‘I know the one I would like to see on your finger,’ he said softly, ‘but you choose, Alice. I’ll look the other way for a moment while you decide.’

Alice didn’t need any time at all to decide. It was a solitaire diamond, set in a gold and platinum ring. It was bold, yet delicate at the same time, and had been the first one which had caught her eye. And as it was slipped onto her finger, it felt exactly right.

Sam had moved aside slightly, looking at something else in another cabinet, and she nudged him, holding out her hand for him to see which one she had chosen.

And at once a broad grin spread over his features. ‘Snap,’ was all he said.

Now that the best sale he’d had for weeks was about to happen, the owner insisted on making sure that the ring fitted perfectly before he very carefully placed it into a small red velvet box, wrapped it up, and passed it to Sam – who put it into his pocket.

Then they left the shop, and resumed their stroll along the streets.

Alice snuggled into him. ‘Thank you, Sam – for such a beautiful engagement ring,’ she said softly. ‘I shall be so proud to wear it.’

‘And I shall be so proud that you have agreed to wear it,’ he said. ‘That you have agreed – that you are prepared – to link your life with mine, Alice.’

For quite a few minutes neither of them spoke, both wrapped up in the significance of the occasion – an occasion which would never come again. Then –

‘I’ve booked a table for dinner at the French restaurant at the top of the town,’ he said, looking down at her. ‘I hope that suits Madam… I’ve asked that we have a quiet corner all to ourselves,’ he added.

Alice smiled. Was she ever going to stop smiling! ‘That will be just perfect,’ she said. ‘I’ve glanced in at the place once or twice – but it’s rather posh, and very expensive! Far too expensive for me to have tried.’

‘But not too expensive for us,’ he replied, returning her smile. ‘I’ve booked it for 7 o’clock – and it’s already gone 5.30. So perhaps we should go back and smarten up a bit.’

Presently, upstairs in her bedroom, Alice decided to wear the simple dress she had worn at Gloria’s wedding. It had been one of Helena’s which she’d admired – and which Helena had insisted Alice should have. ‘It’s a very youthful style,’ she’d said, ‘and it will look so much nicer on you, Alice.’

Now, as Alice slipped it on, she knew at once that it was right for this very special evening…her very special evening. The pale grey cashmere with its gently flowing style seemed to have been made especially for her figure, the small purple wool flower on the shoulder exactly right as its only addition to its simplicity. Alice owned very little jewellery, but she did decide that perhaps her drop earrings with the small amethyst stone would look good. And what about her hair? Tonight she was going to leave it loose.

She undid the thick, coiled plait which she always dressed on top, then let her hair fall in long waves which reached down to her shoulders. Then she began to brush it out carefully.

After a few seconds she stopped what she was doing, and glanced at her reflection in the dressing table mirror. And remembered that other time she’d loosened her hair…had loosened it for that other man whom fate had decided should cross her path, if only for a few hours. Marvin. The American preparing for the D-Day landings. He had been so, so sad…

A lump rose in Alice’s throat, now, as she remembered the expression on his face when he’d gently run his fingers through her hair and looked down into her eyes. And told her that she was the double of his long-time girl, Patsy, whom he adored, and who, just before his unit was shipped out, had told him she had found someone else and that she no longer loved him. Even though they had been devoted to each other for a very long time.

As, presumably, had Max and his wife been before she left him for someone else, Alice thought instinctively.