The High-Street Bride’s Guide: How to Plan Your Perfect Wedding On A Budget

Not all buffets were made equal, though – there are a few different ways that you can do this. First up: a very British classic. This is your traditional buffet – all triangle sarnies, cocktail sausages and little pieces of cheese and pineapple on sticks. Beef it up with the likes of pizza slices and Indian or Chinese snack selections – and add some jelly and ice-cream if it’s not too hot for a touch of retro fun.

Second, if your venue is the kind where you supply your own caterers, talk to them about something a bit different, or pull it together yourself. Sweetie tables have been big for a while now and aren’t showing any signs of going anywhere. They’re literally pretty tables spread with Cath Kidston-esque linen, glass jars filled with sweets and maybe a few cakes – we used our wedding cake as the centrepiece. Seriously, think how easy it would be to nab some containers (save, hire or buy from your local ASDA or Wilkinson), then raid your local pick ‘n’ mix (we miss you, Woolworths!) or snap up grab-bags of your fave sweets and go fill ’em up.

On a similar theme – but requiring more input from your caterers, who will love your ingenuity – ‘build-your-own’ bars are popping up all over the place. Featuring everything from top-your-own jacket potatoes or ice creams to fill-your-own fajitas, brainstorm fave foods with your groom and go from there. Anyone for stack-your-own sandwich with baguettes, cobs and rolls, or build-a-burger with different meats, veggie bean patties, relish and sauces?

Finally, if you’ve got chefs among your rellies who are vying for a part in proceedings, make the most of their talents instead of padding out your ceremony with a million readings. You can specify your favourite eats or just allocate some cooks sweets and some savouries, then have each one bring a labelled dish – preferably one that can be served cold unless your venue doesn’t mind you using their ovens – along with serving utensils so everyone can dig in on the day. Now that’s what I call a family feast.

Bottle It

Drinkies are a sizeable cost that you two don’t have to carry alone – it’s not uncommon for couples to put in for a drink or two per guest before the wedding breakfast, a drink or two during and a glass of bubbly for the toasts, then open up the bar for the rest of the night and let everybody pay for their own.

Keep costs down by talking corkage with your venue and bringing your own bottles, or opting for less expensive beverages like house wine, and clinking glasses with Prosecco or Buck’s Fizz over straight champers. You could even wheel out your own big-day punch or cocktail – just make it with more juices than alcohol and stick to the affordable stuff.

Little Extras

We’ll get into this in the Style Details chapter, but for now I’ll just say that you need to keep an eye out for what’s included with your wedding package. Some venues will throw in tidbits like pretty chair covers – great if you can get them, but the question is, do you really want them? Unless their seating really ruins your theme or is all-out supremely hideous, at around £3 to £5 per chair on average, that’s another £300 to £500 for 100 people. Before you put your John (or Joanne) Hancock on anything, talk about ditching the bonus bits and trimming down the bottom line.

The same goes for stationery. It’s common for an all-in package to include bits like menus and place names. Ask to see samples, and find out how much of your quote they’ll be setting you back. If they do the job and they’re easy on your margins, go with them by all means, but scout out local printers beforehand to check you couldn’t get them cheaper – and more personalised – yourself.

Then there’s VAT. It’s not uncommon for venues to quote an off-their-head price that sounds spectacular until you realise they’re not counting the tax. Be clear on whether it’s included or you could end up with a bumper bill that’s due the week before your big day.

Beyond the Norm

If you’re open to suggestions for your reception venue, or you’re looking for somewhere quirky and so you, there are ways to nigh-on cancel all your hire costs. Remember: as long as you do the legal bit in a certified room or registry office, you can do the rest wherever you want.

At one particularly lovely wedding I went to, the bride and groom had the ceremony the week before, then on the day the bride’s dad acted as registrar. He read some of his own words while the bride and groom exchanged rings and said how they really felt in front of close friends and family. In case you’re wondering: not a dry eye in the house.

Whether you have the ceremony on the day or a more intimate get-together just before then, doing the ‘I do’s’ separately to dancing the night away blows your venue options wide open.

The Grand Theme of Things

So we’ve established that you can hold your reception wherever you want once the papers are signed – and that means a friend’s house or back garden if you happen to know someone with plenty of space, and even more patience. Remember though, if you throw your bash at a mate’s place or go with the marquee option you’ll usually have more choice of suppliers, but you have to be prepared to handpick them yourself – and to sort out the cleaning afterwards.

If you’d rather stick someone else with the washing up, don’t forget you can break out your first dance at any party venue. If you’re having trouble finding anything realistic when you Google ‘wedding venues’ in your area, swap in ‘party venues’ and see what happens.

You’d be surprised how many weird and wonderful places regularly set aside rooms for celebrations: aquaria; boats; cinemas – especially indie ones; courts (yes, you read that right); galleries; libraries; museums; sports clubs; theatres; tourist attractions; unis and colleges outside term time; zoos…

But there are even more options beyond those. Sometimes options neither you nor even the owner has ever thought of. At the end of the day, where you hold your do is about where you can negotiate hire of, even if they don’t normally do it.

How about a loft or apartment that’s available for short-term rental? There are all sorts of sites that offer up people’s homes in popular cities such as London or Edinburgh – just check with the homeowner whether it’s okay to bring a fair few friends back.

Then there are photo studios – they’re often up for hire for freelance photographers and can be great if you’re after a real blank canvas. Because they’re often owned by arty types, you can find some amazing buildings with exposed brick or beams for a cool, contemporary backdrop.

Wherever you find yourself, even if they don’t usually hire out to anyone at all, if you like the space and can see it transformed for your big day, what’s the harm in asking? You’ve got the best chance of getting a green light from the manager if you stick to these three simple rules:

1. The Time is Right

When is the place you’re pitching your wedding to likely to have quiet periods, and how can you capitalise on that? If you’re after a summer or weekend wedding, for example, try university or college buildings – they don’t have the student spend while they’re all back home working summer jobs, but you can bring in a few extra bucks.

If you’re happy to go with a weekday wedding, how about a wine bar on a quiet Monday night? Just remember, you’ll have to suss out a good time to get all your decs set up and your entertainment in – many places will let you get them sorted the night before, but check to avoid delays on the day.

2. What’s in it for Them?

If your off-piste venue serves food and drink, agree a minimum spend instead of a hire price. You’re bringing them 100 people who are planning on drinking from mid-afternoon into the night – you shouldn’t have to pay another £1,000 for the privilege. If they’re not that kind of outfit, it’s time to talk about hire prices. Shocking fact: these are likely to be lower in slow periods and higher in busy ones – well I never.

Alternatively, if they’re a smaller business, think about whether there’s a skill you can offer them – filmmakers, photographers or writers could do recordings, shots or copy for their PR purposes. Bloggers or tweeters with a decent following could promote or review them. It doesn’t even have to be you – maybe a willing family member could offer their services as your wedding present.

Whatever you agree on though, make sure you’re covered. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: ensure VAT is included in the price you’re quoted, and make sure you get yourself a contract in writing.

3. It’s Not the Size, It’s What You Do With It

This is just one reason why the size of your guest list counts: it alters your venue-spotting strategy. The best way to pin down an unusual place? Look for venues with that all-important separate hire space.

Let’s take restaurants as an example. If you’ve got a super-size group of, say, more than 100, you can try your luck with asking to hire out the whole place, but in some cases you’ll find they want you to cover the cost of all the custom they’d have got in and out of the door over the periods you want them for. That can mean – and I’d sit down here if I were you – as much as £10,000 or more if you want to hire them over lunch and dinner. For guest lists of that size, you’re better off looking at a bigger building to start off with – somewhere like a university that’s built for large numbers of people, and will have a big enough room just idly going spare.

Let’s call a medium group between 40 and 100. For this sort of size you’ve got the chance to downsize to the type of medium-to-small place that has a spare floor. Leaving downstairs free for other customers to come and go as they please means you won’t have to cover the costs of what they’d usually eat or drink, and places that haven’t been hired out for weddings before will be keener to help you if they don’t have to turn away regulars.

If you can keep your numbers intimate – in some cases as small as 10 or 15, or up to 50 to 70 if you’re lucky – you can simply hire a room. Plenty of eateries offer secluded dining areas for private parties where you can celebrate completely undisturbed, and since they rarely charge, an agreement RE food and drink spend should pretty much do the trick.

The only issue with this smallest option is entertainment – check with your venue about whether they’d be happy to clear out tables and chairs for dancing and mingling when you’re done eating, or whether they have the facilities for you to pipe in some of your own playlists. If not, can you bring your iPod and hook it up to a set of speakers? Or maybe you’ve got an unexpected way to while away the time in mind – stand-up comedy, close-up magic or a silhouette artist and some good old-fashioned conversation, anyone? Check out the Entertainment section for more ideas.

Crucial Money-Saving Questions

Take this check-list along to your venue and make sure you save maximum monies.

1. If we were to hold our wedding here in the next three months/on a weekday/off-peak, say, in winter, what discount could you offer us on the standard rate?

2. Is it possible for us to bring in our own food or caterers?

3. If not, what dining options do you offer besides the three-course wedding breakfast? Is it possible to substitute that for a buffet/barbecue/hog roast/afternoon tea?

4. If not, could we serve the canapés in place of our starter, or our wedding cake in place of dessert?

5. Would you be averse to us setting up our own additional sweetie/potato/sandwich bar before the wedding breakfast/as the wedding breakfast/later in the evening?

6. Is it possible for us to bring in our own drinks, and if so, what do you charge for corkage?

7. If not, what would our costs per head look like if we served house wine instead of the more expensive selections, and Prosecco/Buck’s Fizz instead of champagne?

8. What is included with our package? Is it possible to remove the stationery/chair covers/other smaller details and reduce the price?

9. Do you have the facilities for us to use an iPod or other MP3 player for music later in the evening, or would we need to bring in a band/DJ?

10. Do you have a list of preferred suppliers who might be willing to offer us a preferential rate if we book with you?

11. Is VAT included with all the costs you’ve quoted?

Chapter 3