Love's Labour's Lost

thee.
COSTARD. I Pompey am, Pompey surnam'd the Big-
DUMAIN. The Great.
COSTARD. It is Great, sir.
Pompey surnam'd the Great,
That oft in field, with targe and shield, did make my foe to
sweat;
And travelling along this coast, I bere am come by chance,
And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France.

If your ladyship would say 'Thanks, Pompey,' I had done.
PRINCESS OF FRANCE. Great thanks, great Pompey.
COSTARD. 'Tis not so much worth; but I hope I was perfect.
I made a little fault in Great.
BEROWNE. My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves the best Worthy.

Enter SIR NATHANIEL, for ALEXANDER

NATHANIEL. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's
commander;
By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquering
might.
My scutcheon plain declares that I am Alisander-
BOYET. Your nose says, no, you are not; for it stands to right.

BEROWNE. Your nose smells 'no' in this, most tender-smelling
knight.
PRINCESS OF FRANCE. The conqueror is dismay'd. Proceed, good
Alexander.
NATHANIEL. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's
commander-
BOYET. Most true, 'tis right, you were so, Alisander.
BEROWNE. Pompey the Great!
COSTARD. Your servant, and Costard.
BEROWNE. Take away the conqueror, take away Alisander.
COSTARD. [To Sir Nathaniel] O, Sir, you have overthrown
Alisander
the conqueror! You will be scrap'd out of the painted cloth
for
this. Your lion, that holds his poleaxe sitting on a
close-stool,
will be given to Ajax. He will be the ninth Worthy. A
conqueror
and afeard to speak! Run away for shame, Alisander.
[Sir Nathaniel retires] There, an't shall please you, a
foolish
mild man; an honest man, look you, and soon dash'd. He is a
marvellous good neighbour, faith, and a very good bowler; but
for
Alisander- alas! you see how 'tis- a little o'erparted. But
there
are Worthies a-coming will speak their mind in some other
sort.
PRINCESS OF FRANCE. Stand aside, good Pompey.

Enter HOLOFERNES, for JUDAS; and MOTH, for HERCULES

HOLOFERNES. Great Hercules is presented by this imp,
Whose club kill'd Cerberus, that three-headed canus;
And when be was a babe, a child, a shrimp,
Thus did he strangle serpents in his manus.
Quoniam he seemeth in minority,
Ergo I come with this apology.
Keep some state in thy exit, and vanish. [MOTH retires]
Judas I am-
DUMAIN. A Judas!
HOLOFERNES. Not Iscariot, sir.
Judas I am, ycliped Maccabaeus.
DUMAIN. Judas Maccabaeus clipt is plain Judas.
BEROWNE. A kissing traitor. How art thou prov'd Judas?
HOLOFERNES. Judas I am-
DUMAIN. The more shame for you, Judas!
HOLOFERNES. What mean you, sir?
BOYET. To make Judas hang himself.
HOLOFERNES. Begin, sir; you are my elder.
BEROWNE. Well followed: Judas was hanged on an elder.
HOLOFERNES. I will not be put out of countenance.
BEROWNE. Because thou hast no face.
HOLOFERNES. What is this?
BOYET. A cittern-head.
DUMAIN. The head of a bodkin.
BEROWNE. A death's face in a ring.
LONGAVILLE. The face of an old Roman coin, scarce seen.
BOYET. The pommel of Coesar's falchion.
DUMAIN. The carv'd-bone face on a flask.
BEROWNE. Saint George's half-cheek in a brooch.
DUMAIN. Ay, and in a brooch of lead.
BEROWNE. Ay, and worn in the cap of a tooth-drawer. And now,
forward; for we have put thee in countenance.
HOLOFERNES. You have put me out of countenance.
BEROWNE. False: we have given thee faces.
HOLOFERNES. But you have outfac'd them all.
BEROWNE. An thou wert a lion we would do so.
BOYET. Therefore, as he is an ass, let him go.
And so adieu, sweet Jude! Nay, why dost thou stay?
DUMAIN. For the latter end of his name.
BEROWNE. For the ass to the Jude; give it him- Jud-as, away.
HOLOFERNES. This is not generous, not gentle, not humble.
BOYET. A light for Monsieur Judas! It grows dark, he may
stumble.