Country Rivals

Lottie smiled. Sam was as bad as Gran; once she had an idea she was like a bloody terrier. There was no letting go, but this was one decision that Lottie wasn’t going to be bullied into. It wasn’t just that they couldn’t afford it – it was more than that. The whole idea scared her: all that responsibility, just her and Rory and a tiny defenceless baby. She glanced down at Alice, who had slipped her small hand into her mother’s and was standing quietly at her side.

What she’d said to Sam about Alexa was true. She’d never really known her mother, as she’d been a toddler when Alexandra had died, leaving just her and Billy. She loved her father and she knew he loved her, but she also knew she’d changed his life. Thrown a burden of responsibility on the young show-jumper that had altered the course of his future. Even now, when she was supposed to be all grown up, she still remembered those feelings she’d had as a teenager. She’d hated her mother, the woman she’d never known – truly hated her with a strength that had left her feeling sick and guilty – for leaving and turning their lives upside down.

Her only real memories came from photographs, of a laughing carefree girl, forever young. A girl who’d flitted away, abandoned her. They’d got by, but she dimly remembered the many heated arguments she’d overheard between Billy and Elizabeth, and the frequent occasions when a groom had picked her up from school. ‘I wish I was a better dad,’ he’d said when he rang her from yet another show-jumping event, apologetic that he’d missed a parents’ evening, a sports day. But he had been a good dad, a good dad trying to be a mum as well. Struggling to be everything, when her mother should have been there. How could she even think about being a mother herself when she didn’t know what one really was? She’d either be stupidly over-protective or resent the whole idea of motherhood and carry on as she always had.

‘I do love this terrace.’ Amanda ran a hand along the stone balustrade, trying to change the subject, glancing up at her through long eyelashes with a worried frown.

But there was no need. Sam had already been distracted.

‘Bloody ‘ell, look at that.’ She was staring across the grass towards the dark figures of Rory and Mick, suddenly illuminated as a Catherine wheel sprang into life, sending them dashing for cover as it spat out an uneven shower of light in all directions, like water from a hosepipe with kinks in it. ‘Girls, come here, quickly, Alice, Roxy, come on Davey.’

The fireworks had started with a bang, well, a splutter. Davey galloped up the steps, little Roxy clapping her hands in delight at the turn of speed, the giggles turning to a wail as a huge rocket exploded like a cannon, scattering an enormous shower of sparks into the black night sky. She burst into tears, while Alice clutched Amanda’s hand tightly in both of her own and looked up at her aghast.

‘They won’t get you, darling, they’re in the sky, like the stars.’

Alice’s brow was creased in a frown as she listened to her mother earnestly, and Roxy stopped the noise while she considered the new revelation.

‘If they’re stars why do they disappear? Stars stay until I go to sleep.’

‘Only a few more,’ Lottie glanced at her watch, ‘then it’s midnight and there’ll be one big bang and all over.’

‘Friggin’ hell.’ The yell from Rory carried clearly across to the terrace. ‘Run Mick, the whole bloody lot’s about to go.’ The two men started sprinting towards the house, still carrying their torches and their audience watched open-mouthed. ‘Maybe not.’ Rory ground to a halt and grinned up at them from the bottom of the steps. ‘False alarm, folks.’ But he’d spoken too soon, as with a terrific squeal the firework show started in disorganised earnest.

‘You stupid eejit.’ Mick was laughing as he doubled over, trying to get his breath back. ‘I told you to put the lid on.’

‘Lost it.’ His words were drowned out by the noise as more fireworks lit the night sky.

Roxy had forgotten her tears. Hands on hips, she stood at her mother’s side looking down at Rory, then she waved a finger. ‘I’m,’ bang, ‘vewy’ double explosion, ‘disappointed. You’ve,’ bang, ‘wuined everything.’ And with that she folded her arms and, marching to the back of the terrace, sat down.

Mick laughed. ‘God knows why I agreed to help you, you idiot.’

‘I think it’s pretty spectacular, actually.’ Rory rolled over and lay on the damp grass, staring up at the sky. ‘Synchronised displays are for sissies.’

‘Anybody for a glass of bubbly? Close enough to midnight, by my reckoning.’ Dom popped the cork as the last of the fireworks fizzled out and Lottie passed the glasses round, saving Rory’s to last.

‘Happy New Year, darling.’

She stared into his eyes and what shone back was pure optimism, love of life, and love for her. It was going to be alright. This year would be fine. They’d sort something out, work out how to raise the money they needed to keep Tipping House going until the wedding business was back in full flow. They’d come up with a plan together, and he was happy with the time he spent with Roxy and Alice. No responsibility, just fun. ‘Happy New Year, Rory.’

‘Stop worrying.’ His kissed the end of her nose and grinned. ‘It’s going to be a good year. I’ve got a feeling in my water.’

Lottie giggled. ‘Hmm, that could be all the beer you drank when you were setting the fireworks up.’

‘You could be right, but I think I deserve a New Year shag anyway, after providing such brilliant entertainment.’

‘Shush.’ Lottie put a hand over his mouth and glanced over at Roxy anxiously. The little girl had surprisingly good hearing and a habit of repeating new words at the worst possible time. Shag, she was sure, should not be part of a three-year-old’s vocabulary.

‘Sorry to break the party up, but we’d better go.’ Amanda smiled and scooped up the yawning Alice. ‘Past bedtime isn’t it, poppet?’ The little girl rested her head on her mother’s shoulder and put her thumb in her mouth. ‘Happy New Year, Lottie.’ She kissed first Lottie, then Rory. ‘Thank you for a lovely evening.’

‘Me too.’ Mick drained his glass. ‘I better get a move on. I promised to call Niamh, she’s not forgiven me yet for not making it back home to Ireland with her to see the New Year in. I need to earn some brownie points.’ He winked at Lottie, then ruffled her hair. ‘I think I’d better be checking the cheap flights out and keep her company for a few days. Happy New Year, treasure.’ He shook Rory’s hand. ‘Cheers, mate. See you all tomorrow.’

* * *

‘I can’t believe it’s so long since we last had a wedding here, can you?’

‘Peaceful isn’t it?’ Rory pulled Lottie to him and nuzzled at her neck until she wriggled and tried to escape. ‘Lovely, just us and the kids. No bossy mothers-of the-bride about. Maybe we should have one of our own?’

‘Bossy mother? We’ve got Gran.’

‘I meant a kid.’ He smoothed his hand over her stomach and felt Lottie instinctively tighten her muscles.

‘We’ve got Roxy and Alice.’

‘One of our own would be nice, wouldn’t it?’

‘Nice when you can hand them back.’ She smiled, but he didn’t miss the tightness in her voice, or the little sigh of exasperation that he was sure she had tried to keep in. ‘And anyway we’re having enough trouble looking after ourselves and the horses.’

‘You’ll be able to start up the business again soon. Stop worrying.’

‘But I do worry.’

Rory grimaced. He’d got worries of his own; worries that he’d rather hoped would have disappeared by now, before Lottie found out. But he knew that life for them would never be straightforward, they didn’t live a nine-to-five existence and didn’t want to. There would never be a good time to start a family, but people did it anyway, didn’t they? ‘Well there’s plenty of time. I didn’t mean we had to rush into it, but it’s what everybody does, isn’t it? I mean not even Dom and Amanda wasted time.’

She stared. ‘We’re not wasting time. Is that what you think? You’re wasting your life?’

‘Don’t be daft, Lots. I only meant it’s what people do, it’s just normal.’

‘But we don’t have to be the same as everybody else, do we?’

‘Well no, but … I mean, it’s the next step, isn’t it?’

‘It doesn’t have to be. I mean, aren’t you happy with it just being the two of us?’

‘Of course I am.’

‘You’re not getting bored?’

‘How could I get bored of you?’ He pulled her closer in to his side. ‘But I thought it might be fun teaching our own kids how to do stuff. And Mum was saying how she’d love to be a grandma …’

‘Oh, I’m sorry.’ Lottie looked down. ‘Look, I am sorry if that’s what she wants, I just …’

‘It’s not a problem, honest. No rush, let’s make them wait a bit, eh? Anyway,’ he grinned, ‘I know that one day you’ll love having a tiny version of me to boss around.’

She didn’t smile back. ‘Maybe, but not yet.’

‘You’re not doing my ego much good here.’

‘Your ego does fine on its own, Rory Steel.’ The smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. ‘I just want things to be right between us first.’