Country Rivals

‘Mine’s called Woopert and Alice has got Bilbo. He’s black. Mine is owange.’ Supplied Roxy helpfully.

Lottie stared at the pony. ‘We call it chestnut, Roxy.’ And then at the grinning Rory. ‘And what does Sam say?’

‘Wow, isn’t it amazing, babe? How awesome is that? My little princess riding and everything, just like a real lady.’ Rory clapped his hands together and grinned as he completed what Lottie had to admit was quite a good impersonation of Samantha.

‘Mummy says I can go to Lympi next year and I’m going to be a pumpkin.’ Roxy tugged experimentally on one rein. ‘Can you make me into a pumpkin Lottie? You can do sewing stuff and Mummy doesn’t cos it hurts her nails.’ Her face was solemn. ‘I can be owange then like Woopert. I’ve got lots of days to pwactise.’

‘Chestnut.’ Lottie corrected automatically.

‘She means Olympia Horse Show. She’s been watching YouTube videos of the fancy-dress parade.’

‘Doesn’t she mean a plum pudding then? You don’t see pumpkins at Christmas really, do you?’ She leaned in closer to Rory and lowered her voice so the girls couldn’t hear. ‘Wouldn’t it have been better to have given owange Woopert to Alice and let Roxy have black Bilbo? She can say her Bs.’

‘Your grandmother specifically said they were to be this way round.’

‘I bet she did.’

‘Said something about speech impediments should not stand in the way of life decisions.’

Lottie rolled her eyes.

‘What colour are plum puddings, Worwy?’

Rory never got chance to answer as a squeal of delight, and clapping of hands, had everybody turning round, apart from the pony.

‘Oh my God, oh wow, aren’t they just gorge? How adorable is that cute little horse?’ Rushing in on her high heels, bracelets jangling, Samantha Simcock blew a kiss in Rory’s direction then wrapped her arms around Lottie, engulfing her in a waft of very expensive perfume, which contrasted alarmingly with Lottie’s own eau-de-horse. In fact the two girls appeared polar opposites in every visible way. Where Lottie had curves, Sam was model-slim (with the exception of her very expensive boobs), her complexion was as perfectly made-up and blemish-free as a touched-up photo of a model, her clothes the height of fashion and her blue eyes as clear as a baby’s. But appearances could be deceptive and Sam was as down to earth and honest as they came, and more – like Lottie – strong willed and determined than she looked.

When Sam and her husband, England goalkeeper David Simcock, had moved into the neighbouring (and very upmarket) village of Kitterly Heath she had, for a very brief time, been lonely, but with her extrovert personality and natural warmth it hadn’t taken her long to make friends.

In Tippermere she should have been a fish out of water, but she wasn’t. Everybody warmed to Sam; she was non-judgemental and generous to a fault, which more than compensated for the fact that her view of life in the country was slightly unusual, to say the least. Sam’s dog, Scruffy, was the only dog in the village to sport a diamante collar; she was the only girl who had ever turned up at a Boxing Day meet in six-inch heels, and she flatly refused to get on a horse on the grounds that a fall might have a devastating effect on her boob implants.

Sam had hung on to her bling and embraced the countryside in her own way – complete with high heels, hair extensions, weekly manicure and Botox.

Lottie loved every outrageous inch of her friend and couldn’t imagine life without her.

‘How are you doing, babe? You and Rory are just so sweet looking after little Roxy for me. Aww, come on Alice honey, don’t stand in the doorway all shy. You get on your little horse as well, sweetie pie, and I can take a picture of you both together. Her Ladyship is so fab, isn’t she? Oh Daddy will be so proud. Our own little princess on a horse, just like the royal family and Jordan, you know, whatchamacallher, Katie.’

Lottie wasn’t too sure that the Windsors would want to be wrapped up in the same sentence as an ex glamour model, nor was she sure that her gran was ‘fab’.

‘Maybe it would be better if we all went outside?’

‘It’s a bit nippy out there, babe. Did you know you’ve got a blanket thing dangling from you?’ The stage whisper carried clearly across the room.

Lottie gave the blanket an experimental tug, wondering if ripping it off would work or whether she needed scissors. ‘They’re ponies. They’re supposed to be outside. That’s why they’ve got fur coats.’ Lottie looked pointedly from Sam’s fur to the ponies and back again. ‘And the light’s much better if you want to take a photo. It’s so gloomy in here in the winter.’

‘Aww aren’t you clever? Here you are, babe. I’ve got some nail scissors in my bag somewhere.’ She rifled through the contents of her very large tote, eventually coming up trumps. ‘Come on girls.’

‘Do you think we should wash him?’ Alice was staring at her Shetland pony, who was waiting patiently behind her in the hallway, and was looking as genuinely concerned as her mother often did when faced with a cushion that needed plumping up. Lottie had never met a child quite like her (although she was the first to admit she was no expert where children were concerned), but found her much easier to handle than Roxy, who at three years old was already as huggable as Sam was, but twice as energetic. Rory loved her.

‘I think you could brush him later.’ Lottie gave Alice a hug. ‘But he might turn into an icicle if we get him all wet now. Here you are, let me lift you up.’ Once in the saddle, Alice was as still, upright and elegant as her dressage rider father, unlike Roxy, who was bouncing about like one of the terriers.

‘Mummy, Mummy can we paint Woopert’s nails so they look like mine?’

It was only then that Lottie noticed Roxy’s teeny tiny nails were sparkling like diamonds. In fact they could be diamonds, knowing Sam.

‘Course we can, babe, can’t we Lottie? He will look so cute with pretty feet.’

‘They’re not real diamonds, are they?’ Lottie hoped she didn’t sound as horrified as she felt.

‘Don’t be daft, hun.’ Sam giggled, a carbon copy of Roxy’s. She lowered her voice and leaned in conspiratorially. ‘Don’t tell her but they’re diamante, like Scruffy’s collar, but she thinks they’re the real deal.’ Her voice lifted. ‘Cos she’s my little princess, aren’t you, babe?’

‘And Woopert is my pwince.’ Roxy for once sounded serious, then grinned.

‘It might come off quite quickly in the field.’ Lottie dreaded what Uncle Dom, or her gran, would say, if they spotted a diamond-encrusted pony in the paddock.

Samantha frowned, then just as quickly smiled. ‘Well we can get him a nice sparkly harness thing for his head can’t we? Like Scruffy’s collar. I mean he’s got to look handsome when we go to Olympia and ride in front of all those people, hasn’t he?’

‘I don’t think …’ Lottie didn’t know quite how to put this.

‘We are going aren’t we, babe? Dave will be so proud, just like Wembley and him playing for England. When he played in the World Cup I was so proud of him, and he’ll be just as chuffed to see his little princess on her horse, won’t he, babe?’

‘It’s not that easy. Roxy has only just started riding, and,’ Lottie floundered, looking at Rory for help, wondering just how to explain that the three-year-old might not quite be ready to star at an international horse show. Whereas she often had doubts, Sam had none. She was an unstoppable force, totally confident of her own ability to conquer the world.

‘Bit of a challenge for next year, Sam. Have to see how it goes, won’t we girls?’ Rory supplied.

Sam gave him a hug. ‘Oh, you’re so sensible and clever, isn’t he, Lots?’ She kissed him. ‘The best godfather in the world, isn’t he Roxy, babe?’ She giggled. ‘The godfather, oh that sounds bad, doesn’t it? Aww and it’s so nice of you to bring the horses inside. I mean it’s parky out, freeze the balls off a …’ She put a hand over her mouth and laughed again. ‘Listen to me, and in front of the kiddies.’

‘The horses aren’t supposed to come in the house.’ Lottie frowned in Rory’s direction.

‘Aren’t they babe? Well, why?’

‘Worwy said Lady Lizbet would let us.’ Roxy was now fed up of sitting on the motionless pony and spotting a way back onto centre stage went for it. ‘Catch me.’ And before anybody could stop her, she’d flung her leg over the pony’s withers and launched herself in her mother’s direction.

‘Isn’t she priceless? Bless.’ Sam kissed her daughter on the head. ‘Shall we take your little pony back to his bed, then?’

‘And then go shopping for nice sparkly things for him to wear?’

Sam, who could never say no to a good shopping trip, especially one that included anything that sparkled, grinned. ‘Course we can, princess.’

Lottie was pretty sure that it was impossible to buy a diamante bridle in Shetland pony size, and totally impossible to buy anything horsey with diamonds on. Pretty sure. But then she’d never seen a shaggy mongrel wearing a diamond-encrusted collar and an Armani jumper until Sam had rehomed Scruffy. Oh, what would the dogs’ home think of him if they could see him now?

‘Come on.’ Roxy tugged experimentally on the reins and the pony turned his head the other way. ‘Naughty horsey.’ Sam might be blond, busty and blingy (in her own words) but she was also ‘bloody determined’ when it suited her, and Roxy, it seemed, had inherited her mother’s genes by the bucket load. Heading round to the other side, she pushed.

Rupert sighed, then yawned, showing a good set of teeth, and shook his head and neck with such vigour that he showered Roxy with what Lottie hoped was shavings, and not as she suspected, dried flakes of mud and poo. Then he rested a back leg as though to demonstrate his complete lack of interest.

Roxy waved a finger. ‘I’m vewy disappointed in you.’ Lottie tried to keep a straight face, but one glance in Sam’s direction and she knew she couldn’t keep it up. Rupert the pony, sensing that his fun might be over, didn’t want to leave the party. ‘Uncle Worwy, make him move.’

‘Has your mummy never told you that boys don’t like bossy girls?’