I want to be rid of it but I cannot be.
What shall I do?
Bankei did not say a word,
just stared deep into the eyes of the disciple,
who began to sweat
in those few heavy minutes of silence.
He wanted to break the silence
but couldn’t gather the courage.
Then Bankei laughed and said: It’s strange!
I searched and searched but could find
no anger within you.
Still, show me a little of it, here and now.
The disciple said: It is not always here.
It comes all of a sudden, how can I produce it now?
Bankei laughed again and said:
Then it is not your true nature.
That remains with you always,
and if your anger had been part of it
you could have shown it to me.
When you were born it was not with you,
when you die it will not be with you.
No, this anger is not you.
There is a mistake somewhere.
Go away and think again,
search again, meditate again.
141. Love.
God purifies in every way.
It is not only gold that has to pass through fire
to be purified
but man too.
For man this fire is the anguish of love.
It is a blessing when this fire enters a person’s life;
it is the fruit of infinite prayers, infinite births.
It is the intensity of thirst that turns finally into love,
but unfortunately few are able to welcome it
because few can recognize love in the form of anguish.
Love is not a throne, it is a cross;
but those who gladly offer
themselves to it attain the very highest throne.
The cross can be seen, the throne cannot –
it is always hidden behind the cross.
And even Jesus hesitated for a moment;
even his heart cried out: Father, why hast thou forsaken me?
But the next moment he remembered and said:
Thy will be done.
That was enough:
the cross became a throne
and death a new life.
In the moment of revolution
between one statement and the next