The Narcissist Test: How to spot outsized egos ... and the surprising things we can learn from them

The Narcissist Test: How to spot outsized egos ... and the surprising things we can learn from them
Dr Craig Malkin

What exactly is narcissism? An incurable disease set to ruin your future, a habit to be curbed, or a trait to be nurtured? And how can you tell if your partner, child, or even you are a narcissist? Dr Craig Malkin offers a new picture of narcissism, showing us why being called a ‘narcissist’ isn’t necessarily such a bad thing after all.Narcissism is all around us. We are a selfie-obsessed generation, surviving on a steady diet of watching reality shows that celebrate attention-seeking know-and-do-nothings and posting a whopping 500 million tweets a day to document our every thought and whim. But is narcissism really as bad as we have been led to believe?In this groundbreaking book, clinical psychologist Dr Craig Malkin offers a radically new picture of narcissism, defining it as a spectrum of self-importance, and explaining that everyone falls somewhere on the scale between utter selflessness and total arrogance. He reveals why it is essential to embrace some level of narcissism in order to maintain a healthy sense of self-worth. Feeling special, to a degree, can make us better lovers and partners, courageous leaders, and intrepid explorers.As supportive as it is illuminating, The Narcissist Test is the first and only book to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy narcissism, and offers clear, step-by-step guidance on how to promote the healthy kind in your partner, children, and in yourself. From advice tailored to parents, social media users and even schools, this is the definitive text to help you overcome the bad – and embrace the good – about feeling special.Dr Craig Malkin is a clinical psychologist hailing from Harvard with over two decades of experience helping individuals, couples and families.

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Thorsons

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First published in the US by HarperWave, an imprint of

HarperCollinsPublishers 2015 First published in the UK by Thorsons 2015

FIRST EDITION

© Dr Craig Malkin 2015

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Illustration on page 1: Echo and Narcissus, by John William Waterhouse, 1903

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Source ISBN: 9780007583805

Ebook Edition © July 2015 ISBN: 9780007583799

Version: 2015-06-24

For Julie Malkin

Contents

Cover (#u05cc1fe3-3106-5518-ac14-7024286aa110)

Title Page (#u6c49812f-46a4-5655-ae85-327d63e3628c)

Copyright

Dedication (#u7a1bab9e-7679-5645-b1bd-defcd2cfe3a1)

Introduction

The Myth of Narcissus

PART I: WHAT IS NARCISSISM?

1 Rethinking Narcissism: Old Assumptions, New Ideas

2 Confusion and Controversy: How Narcissism Became a Dirty Word and We Found an Epidemic

3 From 0 to 10: Understanding the Spectrum

4 The Narcissism Test: How Narcissistic Are You?

PART II: ORIGINS: HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY NARCISSISM

5 Root Causes: The Making of Echoists and Narcissists

6 Echoism and Narcissism: From Bad to Worse

PART III: RECOGNIZING AND COPING WITH UNHEALTHY NARCISSISM

7 Warning Signs: Staying Alert for Narcissists

8 Change and Recovery: Dealing with Lovers, Family, and Friends

9 Coping and Thriving: Dealing with Colleagues and Bosses

PART IV: PROMOTING HEALTHY NARCISSISM

10 Advice for Parents: Raising a Confident, Caring Child

11 SoWe: The Healthy Use of Social Media

12 A Passionate Life: The Ultimate Gift of Healthy Narcissism

Resources

References

List of Searchable Terms

Acknowledgments

About the Author