Great Sporting Wisdom: Legendary Quotes from the World of Sport

Great Sporting Wisdom: Legendary Quotes from the World of Sport
John Scally

One of the most endearing features of sport is its perennial humour. Witness this extraordinary collection of Freudian slips, true confessions, double entendres and unintentional puns which demonstrates that sporting foot-in-mouth disease is far more rampant than mad cow disease.Players, coaches, commentators and journalists are all represented as well as some famous names who know little about sport but are always good for a quote."I wanted to be an Olympic swimmer but I had some problems with buoyancy."WOODY ALLEN"The first ninety minutes are the most important."BOBBY ROBSON"I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler."DAVID FEHERTYThe British boys are adopting the attacking position with Cox up."DAN MASKELL

Copyright (#ulink_a3d6764e-08bf-58f6-a0a3-d1ec60553b1b)

Harper Non-Fiction

An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF

www.harpercollins.co.uk (http://www.harpercollins.co.uk/)

First published in 1996 by CollinsWillow

Copyright © John Scally 1996

John Scally accepts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

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Source ISBN: 9780002187336

Ebook Edition © JUNE 2016 ISBN: 9780008193263

Version: 2016-06-20

Dedication (#ulink_2489ad11-975b-5ced-b8b5-de0885b0d965)

To Sheila, Aine, James,

Liam and Fiona Finneran

Contents

Cover (#u18992ed8-32b5-5506-aed5-df532a9eedb8)

Title Page (#ue3d9d3c0-b0fb-5aed-b764-065ab7142e0b)

Copyright (#ulink_e8bc6311-29f7-58ad-b14c-575012df1f95)

Dedication (#ulink_23ca79f0-8e32-54ae-bd4c-1ec67849ff3d)

Introduction (#ulink_20db6830-9f09-521b-aea2-be2537c00a45)

The Good, The Glad and The Wordy (#ulink_e93b3b89-2457-5e8f-8e5a-7ad8c028c7e9)

Chapter One: Athletic Aberrations (#ulink_abddfeb3-d7f9-533a-907d-fa7d03cdfcfa)

Chapter Two: Baseball Bloomers (#ulink_cd556eff-02ec-557c-a505-c7e08eaeab7d)

Chapter Three: Basketball Babel (#ulink_ce740099-5e81-5cf6-b357-f074a59b9e6f)

Chapter Four: Board and Card Games (#ulink_4dae7e2c-f3fe-5dec-b196-d0c2051806be)

Chapter Five: Boxing Barbs (#ulink_ef0087fd-8343-5e64-a31a-0655a836aa78)

Chapter Six: Pedal to the Metal (#ulink_2fee6e4e-1df3-5d43-86c0-60a22f65f9b9)

Chapter Seven: Cricket Classics (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eight: Football’s Fun and Frolics (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Nine: Golfing Gems (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Ten: Horse Racing Hoots (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eleven: Ruck and Roll (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twelve: Snooker from the Lip (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Thirteen: Tennis Theatricals (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fourteen: Sporting Miscellany (#litres_trial_promo)

Great Sporting Supermouths of our Time (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fifteen: Walker the Talker (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Sixteen: The Lowe-Down (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Seventeen: On the Great Vine (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eighteen: The Golden Foot in Mouth Award (#litres_trial_promo)

Acknowledgements (#litres_trial_promo)

About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)

Introduction (#ulink_ed47aa25-7cad-5131-9289-8cac2de5b793)

In 1906 Ambrose Bierce defined quotation as ‘the act of repeating erroneously the words of another. The words erroneously repeated.’ Down through history much has been said and written about the people and events that have shaped the sporting world. This book assembles some of the most commonly misquoted and misattributed of those sporting quotations.

Humour is a difficult thing to define. What reduces one person to helpless laughter may leave another indifferent. And what makes a funny quote? The context can be crucial.

In normal circumstances the following would not be of great interest: ‘Sharp are currently working on bringing 3D TV into your living-rooms. Mr Koshima hopes it will be so realistic that viewers will have to duck when Eric Cantona takes a shot.’