Confessions of a Lapdancer

Aside from my flings with Ryan, I didn’t like to mix business with pleasure too much.

Chapter Two

The celebration at Corney & Barrow proceeded in the usual fashion, with obscene amounts of champagne being bought and consumed and the boys becoming louder and more annoying with every bottle.

I managed to keep pace with them by sipping water each time I took a mouthful of fizz so I didn’t get totally pissed. At least they couldn’t accuse me of being a lightweight.

As the barman called last orders, Luke gathered the guys around him and called for silence.

‘So, Brothers – the fun has only just begun!’ he slurred. ‘You’re all coming with me to a sexy little place I know called the Pearl, where we’ll get down to the serious business of celebrating.’

‘What’s the Pearl?’ I asked Tania, thinking it was some after-hours drinking den.

‘Oh, it’s a lap-dancing club,’ she replied, casually.

‘Bloody typical,’ I said. ‘He’s probably just trying to piss me off.’

Tania looked at me blankly and said, ‘Oh, right. Well, actually it was my idea, not Luke’s.’

Before I had a chance to find out how the hell Tania knew about a lap-dancing club, Luke had come over to pat her on the behind.

‘Coming then, sweetheart?’ he said to Tania, but looking directly at me. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t have been caught dead in a strip club. I hated those sorts of places. They were nothing but exploitation. But I couldn’t ignore the flagrant challenge in Luke’s eyes.

‘Oh no, Mr Cotterill, you’re not getting away with this,’ I said. ‘You’re not leaving me off the guest list.’

‘You’ll just spoil our fun, Geri Boy,’ he said.

‘I insist,’ I said.

‘Well, I guess my hot little babe here might need some company while I’m otherwise engaged,’ he continued. ‘But you’d better not spoil the party.’

Quite why Tania couldn’t see that Luke was using her as arm candy, I had no idea, but there was no point in me tackling her about it as she probably would’ve thought I was jealous. Far from it.

How the fuck could Daryll condone all of this? But perhaps it wasn’t a surprise. However urbane, he was a bit of an old lech himself. I felt he’d thrown me to the wolves by not preparing me for Luke’s relentless barrage of snide comments but then I had to remember what he’d told me when I joined Sloane Brothers: ‘If you want to play with the big boys, Geraldine, you have to beat them at their own game.’ Was Daryll checking to see if I was capable of that?

I followed Tania and Luke out of the bar to be greeted by a white stretch limo. Luke had hired it to ferry the Brothers to the club, which I found utterly laughable.

‘Want a ride in my pimp mobile?’ he asked.

‘I’ll make my own way, thanks, Luke,’ I laughed. ‘If I’d wanted to look like a chav on a stag night I would have worn Burberry and plenty of bling.’

And with that I hopped straight into a black cab, most satisfied that I’d got one over on the arrogant bastard right in front of his boss. If Daryll wanted me and Luke to be at each other’s throats, then he was getting just that.

By the time the Brothers’ stretch had pulled up outside the Pearl, my taxi had already dropped me off and I had made friends with the club’s two enormous doormen.

I watched in disgust as Luke fell out of the limo clutching a half-empty champagne glass and staggered towards the entrance to the Pearl dragging Tania behind him like a blow-up doll.

The two bouncers on the door blocked his path, while he stood waving a bunch of crumpled tenners in their faces.

I winked to let them know this was the party of pissed-up City boys I had the misfortune to be with, and handed one a crisp £50 note. And with that we were in.

‘As you say, Luke, I always wear the trousers so put your money away,’ I said. ‘No need to bribe security. Use it to buy me some very expensive cocktails.’

‘What about some very expensive cock, Miss Carson?’ he shot back. A comment he would never have dared make sober or in the office. ‘Although mine’s out of your price range.’

Tania stood next to him toying nervously with her long, red hair.

‘Hilarious,’ I replied, moving through the club’s entrance. ‘Just get inside, I can’t wait to see an animal in its natural habitat.’

The remainder of the investment team spilled out on to the pavement slightly the worse for wear. Even Daryll looked less dapper than usual, the handkerchief that matched his shirt sitting slightly askew in his jacket pocket.

Then Ryan Buxton came bounding towards me like an overgrown puppy, all ruddy cheeks and rugger-bugger enthusiasm.

‘So, Geri, are you up for this?’ Ryan asked.

‘I’m not missing this one for the world,’ I told him, avoiding the arm he was trying to put around me.

‘I thought you hated places like this, though. You always tell me how sexist they are.’

‘I’m not a big fan, no,’ I told him, ‘but I don’t get to see the Brothers at play too often and I was as much a part of pulling off this merger as anyone else.’

‘You’re not wrong there, darling,’ he said, nuzzling my neck while no one else was looking. ‘Come in and join the fun, then.’

The interior of the club was surprisingly plush if clichéd in its style, with padded red and black leather booths, mirrored walls and mirror balls, with four or five dancing poles arranged on different levels, some with tables around them.

A petite brunette with enhanced breasts jiggling in her bikini brushed past me on her way to the stage and I flinched. What the hell was I doing in a lap-dancing club?

The things I did to advance my career …

Our bonuses were being announced the next day and my colleagues were discussing figures in voices loud enough for everyone to hear how loaded they were and how much more loaded they expected to be within twenty-four hours.

‘How pathetic,’ I said to Tania, who had momentarily been abandoned. ‘It’s all big cars, big bonuses and big dicks to them – except they probably have tiddlers!’

Tania laughed politely.

‘Oh, I’m sure there’s more to them than that, Geri. They must have some talent, after all.’

‘I wouldn’t bank on it, Tania,’ I said. ‘You haven’t been my PA long enough to work that out yet.’

Tanya turned to smile at her man and I glimpsed a steeliness in her eyes.

Daryll beckoned us to join the Brothers at their large banquette.

Not long after we arrived, one of the club’s dancers, a pretty girl with long, dark hair and olive skin who was dressed in a red spangled bra top and thong, approached our table and Luke beckoned her to one side.

‘What’s he up to?’ I whispered in Tania’s ear.

‘Oh, he’s just arranging to have a private dance.’